A Unique Position
by goofballandgoat
Summary: After eight years of teaching at Hogwarts together, Severus and Harry begin to discover their true feelings for one another. Will they end up together? Or will one of them end up in a body bag? SLASH IN FINAL CHAPTER.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling owns all things Harry Potter. We just like making her characters shag. And if there's anyone who needs a shag after the War, it's Severus Snape. Just sayin'.

A/N: Slight A/U; Snape LIVES (E?WE?) Otherwise cannon compliant (and by cannon-compliant we mean there were many trips to and from the bookshelf). NON CON NECK FONDLING!

He had arrived at The Great Hall early as if that would some how make the evening go by faster. As he took his place at the high table to wait for the feast to start he couldn't help himself from remembering the devastation the room had held a little over ten years ago. Couldn't stop himself from seeing the bodies of his friends laid out on the tables, lives laid down so that he, The-Boy-Who-Lived, could fulfill his destiny. He rubbed his scar absentmindedly though it hadn't so much as twinged in years . His gaze rested instinctively on the spot where Voldermort had fallen, where Harry had destroyed 'The Dark Lord' with a simple _Expelliamus_, where he truly became 'The Chosen One'. Now he was The-Man-Who-Just-Wanted-To-Get-Some-Bloody-Sleep. The nightmares were back.

The professors began taking their seats around him giving him odd looks. Usually he was running late or just on time. He hadn't realized that the seats had been reassigned until he found himself hugged from behind by the new Transfiguration Professor, Hermione Weasley, who promptly took the seat on his right. He was saved from having to talk much as Hermione's excitement in starting her new job and being back at Hogwarts kept her going a mile a minute. He was happy for her, but still a little unsure of living so closely with her and Ron again. He had grown fond of the solitude he'd found at the school.

The Headmaster walked in and took his seat to the left of Harry only a moment before the students arrived. Harry was grateful he wouldn't be forced to interact with him beforehand. He tried instead to focus on The Sorting. He quickly conceded that he couldn't be asked to do so this year and allowed his thoughts to turn inwards again, to the months that immediately followed 'That Day'. He attended more funerals than anyone should have to in a lifetime. (He now owned enough black robes to rival Severus's collection.) Then there'd been the celebrations, awards ceremonies, and speeches. He knew and accepted that it was important that he participate, but he'd wanted nothing more than to tuck himself away at Number 12 and deal with his grief privately. He made it almost to Halloween before he did just that.

Harry belatedly joined the applause as The Sorting concluded and the Headmaster stood up and said, "Well, get on with it already," and sat back down again. The food magically appeared and Harry did his best impression of Ron at meal times to dissuade Hermione and, more importantly, the Headmaster from engaging him in conversation. He kept his eyes on his plate silently willing everyone to leave him alone. The Headmaster was a master Legilimens, not that he would need it to discern what was wrong with him. He was the only one who knew that Harry still occasionally suffered from nightmares. He was the only one of Harry's friends who truly understood what it was to be haunted by one's past. Everyone else seemed to have buried those demons long ago.

That was possibly the biggest shock he'd received during 'That Time'. Severus Snape did not die on the floor of The Shrieking Shack. Unbeknownst to them, Fawkes had arrived just after he, Ron, and Hermione left. Snape's devotion to Dumbledore was finally rewarded with a chance for a real and free life. Snape spent the first month of his new life under 24 hour guard at St. Mungo's while he healed and his status was sorted out. He was cleared, but not before his wand had been snapped in two. At least there hadn't been any Dementors around to indulge in more irrevocable justice. He saw Severus once during that time. He'd said nothing only offered his hand, which Severus finally shook after a moment of consideration. Then they'd both turned and walked away from each other.

After he was finally able to pull away from the public eye he tried his best to create his new life. His OWN life. He wasn't very successful. He and Ginny gave it a go, but they'd both been through too much and the people they'd become did not quite fit together. Ron and Hermione had lived with him for awhile and they were still close, but Harry had officially become the third wheel and they moved out a month after Ginny. He'd spent the following year trying to figure out what he wanted to do. Nothing appealed to him. He had several offers to play Quidditch, an offer from the Ministry to go straight into Aurror training (an offer Ron had accepted with alacrity) and George offered him a management position at Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes. He'd thought long and hard about all of them, even taking Hermione's suggestion to write out pro/con lists. In the end he'd declined them all and spent his days rattling around Grimmauld Place. His nights were often spent indulging in large quantities of Firewhiskey.

Then, two years almost to the day after Voldermort's demise, Harry had received an offer from a man he'd never expected to hear from again. Harry had heard rumors that The Board of Governors had finally persuaded Severus to return as Headmaster, but he'd never imagined that Severus would then turn around and offer him a post. The fact that said offer was couched in a challenge and a vague death threat (Snape had referenced Quirrell) hadn't dimmed Harry's excitement one bit. It was like getting his 1st Hogwarts letter, only better; this time he knew he was going home. That it was one final triumph over Tom Riddle had been icing on the cake.

That thought made him realize that the cake that had been in front of him a moment ago was now gone and that Severus had stood up to begin his start of term speech. Harry knew that it would be a good one, as always, but he didn't hear a word past the introduction. Instead he thought about how much had changed between him and Severus. Their first two years back they'd behaved with cool civility towards one another, and if they didn't out and out avoid each other, they succeeded in spending very little time together. That changed during the third year. One afternoon, completely out of the blue, Severus asked him to tea. They chatted for quite awhile. After that they began stopping in the halls or after meals to have a quick word. That eventually led to more teas and the occasional drink. They became closer still the fifth year when he became Deputy Headmaster after McGonagall really and truly retired. Having known each other for almost twenty years by then, they were finally friends (a fact from which Dumbledore derived far too much delight) and there was little he didn't feel comfortable discussing with the older man, though by unspoken agreement the past was the one subject that never came up. There was nothing more to say about it, really.

As the speech wore on he also thought about what hadn't changed. Having sensed his impatience, Severus had decided to go on a bit this year. It wasn't until Hermione's attention began to flag that he relented and ended his speech. Harry applauded and then slipped out a side door as soon as he was able to politely do so. He knew that Severus was expecting him in his office for what had become the traditional start of term drink, but he just didn't have it in him tonight. He was exhausted and Severus's solution would be to talk him into taking Dreamless Sleep. He'd taken it in the past, but now he was much too aware of the downsides. It was addictive, easy to build up a tolerance to, and when taken for extended amounts of time left him feeling no better than if he'd tried to drown himself in Firewhiskey.

It took him twenty minutes to reach his chambers undetected. He could have been there in five, but he'd gone out of his way to ensure he wasn't seen. He'd even managed to avoid Peeves whose favorite lyrical inspiration was still Potter, though the lyrics had improved since Severus had inferred his earlier attempts were mediocre. He breathed a sigh of relief as he entered his rooms, until he realized someone was already there. He figured it was Hermione, but drew his wand anyway before entering the sitting room. Sitting in one of the chairs by the fire reading a book was Severus, who made it look as if it were something he did all the time. Then again, Harry couldn't be sure that it _wasn't_ something he did all the time. It would certainly explain a lot.

"Put your wand down, Potter, and pour yourself a drink." Snape said indicating a bottle he'd clearly brought with him. "Elf made wine, I believe you might find it to your liking." Realizing arguing would be pointless he divested himself of his teaching robes, sat down in the matching chair, and poured himself a drink. Severus waited for him to settle before raising his own glass in salute. "To the start of a new year."

They toasted and Harry finished his glass in one go. He expected to be questioned, but Severus just continued reading.

Severus knew that his continued silence annoyed Potter, but he really could not help himself, especially not when Potter still made it so easy. He didn't ask what was bothering him because he already knew. That was, in fact, why he'd taken the time to break-in in the first place. Surprisingly, it had taken some time. Harry took his personal security just as seriously as Severus took his own; he had only just gotten settled himself before Potter walked in. Severus idly turned the page he wasn't really reading and waited for Potter to engage him. It was something he knew the younger man would not be able to resist.

"Do you do this often, sir?"

Severus casually marked his place in the book and placed it on the table between them. He looked up at Harry. "Do what, exactly?"

"Break into other people's quarters just to ign-, annoy them."

"Am I annoying you?" Severus drawled. "My apologies. I meant only to pay you a visit as a friend to confirm you're feeling well."

"I don't see how you're going to accomplish that by reading a book, and what would you call someone who broke into your quarters only to read in front of you if not annoying?"

Severus fought a smile as Harry poured himself another, rather liberal, glass of wine. This would certainly be an interesting (though highly illegal) experiment when all was said and done. He hadn't thought Harry would accept the drink so readily, nor that he would drink as much as he seemed to be inclined to this evening. He considered warning him, but opted instead to answer the question. "Intellectually curious."

"And just what is it that you're so curious about?"

After a sigh, Severus picked up the book and held it up for Potter to see. It was the new Herbology textbook. "Alright, so I was killing time until you got here. Then you came in, took a seat and ignored me until inquiring about my habits. 'Do you do this often?'," Severus mocked. "No greeting whatsoever."

"I wasn't sure what the appropriate greeting for a trespasser was," Harry said before tipping back half his drink.

Potter was intentionally being a brat and it amused him to no end that he could still, even after all these years, get under Potter's skin. Severus topped off his own drink. "It looks like I should get some of this while I still can," he remarked. "No matter. For the greeting I mean. How are you sleeping?"

"I'm not as you bloody well know," Harry said before finishing off his drink and pouring another.

Severus looked on, amused. "I could help you with that you know," he said, watching the young man avidly as he began his third glass.

"You know how I feel about those types of potions."

"Indeed. Yet you seem to have no problem drinking yourself into a stupor."

"It's just a few glasses of wine, this will hardly lead me into a stupor." As if to prove the point he finished off his drink with a flourish. Then he promptly passed out. Severus retrieved the glass from his limp fingers and placed it on the table. Pulling out a journal and quill he made a few quick notes before getting Harry to bed.

Harry woke up the next morning still exhausted and wondering how and when he'd gotten into bed. He also tried to remember when he fell asleep. He remembered getting back to his quarters, sitting by the fire, having a glass of the wine Severus brought. That thought brought him up short. _"Snape, that lousy git," _Harry thought angrily,_ "No. Severus respects me more than that. He wouldn't dose me. Not __**now**__ anyway." _He realized he was dying for the loo and got up to take care of business. Pulling himself out of bed was harder than he would have imagined. He felt slow and heavy. _"I didn't drink that much," _he thought to himself as he stumbled to the en-suite.

Business taken care of he made it half way to his bed before he glanced at the clock and saw what time it was. He'd slept through breakfast and his first class. If he hurried he might just make the last half of his second class. That was easier said than done. He was aided by an adrenaline kick when he thought of what Severus would do when he found out he'd overslept on the first day of term. He got dressed, throwing on the first things that came to hand. Grabbing his teaching robes, he walked as quickly as he could manage to his classroom on the fourth floor.

He paused outside the door realizing he was slightly dizzy. He took a deep breath and put on his teaching robes before joining his class. He'd anticipated pandemonium. What he found was Severus giving a lecture on The Unforgivables.

"Professor?" Severus said interrupting himself.

"Thank you for covering my class Professor Snape, but I can take it from here." The last bit came out a little slurred as he stifled a yawn.

"I appreciate your dedication, but I assure that won't be necessary. Please take the day. You are clearly unwell." Severus gave him an appraising look and Harry wondered if he looked as bad as he felt. He also wondered what else might have lain behind that look. "Now who can tell me about the _Cruciatus _Curse?" Severus asked, addressing the class once more.

"May I have a word with you _Headmaster_?" He put just enough emphasis on the last word to ensure cooperation. Severus still hated it when Harry feigned his respect. Really, one would think he would have grown out of that.

"Very well," he responded curtly. Harry just smiled at him, as well as he could when he was stifling yet another yawn. Severus strode towards the door gesturing for Harry to precede him. Seveus closed the door directly upon entering the hall just as Harry was casting a _Muffliato_.

"What can I do for you Potter? I'm very busy."

"And I am in the unique position to alleviate you of one of those burdens."

Severus smirked at that remark as Harry swayed a little on his feet. "Are you?"

Harry looked at the man in front of him who did not seem at all surprised at his condition; if anything he was amused. "You dosed me?"

Severus raised his eyebrow in mock astonishment. His uncharacteristically pursed lips betrayed his flippancy. "That's quite an accusation, Professor Potter, one you should take care to consider seriously before you make. The repercussions of such an action are quite severe. I don't generally let these things go easily." Harry swayed once more on his feet, grabbing the door frame to steady himself. "I suggest that you retire to your chambers before you pass out in the hall and embarrass yourself completely."

"This isn't over, Snape." Harry scowled at him once more before turning on his heel and heading back to his rooms. He kept himself going by thinking of what his next move would be. Over the years he'd embraced his Slytherin nature, learned that there was, in fact, something to be said for not rushing in and reacting. Not that it always stopped him. Some habits were hard to break.

His thoughts didn't get much further than that, but it got him to his couch before he passed out again.

Severus retired to his chambers much earlier than usual that evening. Teaching Defence to imbeciles was far more exhausting than he recalled. How Potter tolerated it day in and day out remained a mystery.

Perhaps Potter's foul mood was the result of such experiences. After all, he'd responded to an act of kindness with a very public display of ingratitude. By no means were Potter's actions any different than they would've been when he was a boy and Severus expected nothing else, especially after his display the night previous. Decorum and privacy, however, he'd have thought a person of twenty-eight years would have learned to appreciate. Apparently not.

By his third glass of Meade, Severus was completely certain he handled the Potter situation fairly. After all, he'd followed Potter out of the room before he questioned _Potter's_authority over a Headmaster's decisions. Mutual insolence wouldn't do for either of them, particularly in the wake of the event that had altered his feelings in favor of Potter.

As he finished his Meade, Severus stared absently at the fire crackling before him. He often visited the Pensive to relive with pristine clarity the precise moment he realized how much more there really was to Harry Potter. It sometimes helped him to sleep at night, to learn that there was someone else in the world on his side (which at the time was particularly astonishing as he and Potter had managed to avoid dealing with each other beyond what their positions demanded of them, and then only perfunctorily.)

The event itself was … _uneventful_.

_Though it was hardly his responsibility, everus still found himself lurking in the corridors, seeking misbehaving students. In truth, he was more interested in their gossip and behavior than he was in whether or not they were wandering halls at hours deemed unacceptable by people like himself. So between classes he silently eavesdropped on everyone._

_Pervertedly, he still enjoyed handing out the occasional detention, though he knew them to be virtually useless as a form of punishment. What did it matter if they were wandering the halls, anyway? The war was over. Hogwarts remained secure. If he wanted, he could lock himself in the dungeon and experiment all day long and everything would operate equally smoothly; he was a presence, not an administrator. He liked it that way. He knew he deserved the break._

His pace slowed as the teachers corralled the last of the students into the classrooms. He heard chuckling around a corner and hid behind a pillar. "I heard he's a poof," came a first male voice.

"_He's a right git is what he is. A greasy, filthy . . .."_

"_Gentlemen," an older voice interrupted. Severus immediately identified it as Potter's. "Whom are you talking about?"_

The first boy began to stammer. "It was . . . we . . .."

"_I hope it wasn't Professor Snape," Potter said in a warning tone. Severus peered around the pillar in time to see the guilty glance the boys shared. He knew that look well enough to know that he was, in fact, who they were discussing (not to mention he'd never heard of any of the other professors referred to as greasy, though he often wondered how their hair would fare if they were locked in a dungeon all day brewing potions with dunderheads.) Harry seemed to be following the same line of reasoning._

"_So it was Professor Snape."_

The more foolish of the two took this opportunity to speak up. "Why do you even care? Everyone knows you hate Snape."

"_**Professor**_ _Snape may not be my favorite person, nor I his, but he is one of the best men I know as well as one of the best Headmasters this school has ever seen. You would do well to remember that in the future and behave accordingly. 100 points from Gryffindor."_

Severus remembered how difficult it was to wrap his mind around Potter standing up for him, let alone taking points from his own house. More difficult was understanding how much further he went.

"_But Professor! You don't understand . . .."_

"_A piece!" Potter insisted. "Good luck in the common room tonight, Messrs." With a smirk he bowed the students out of his presence before continuing on his way._

Severus pulled himself out of the pensieve. That had been the turning point in their relationship. That was the day Harry did something Severus had never expected of him. He had truly and utterly surprised him. After that, Severus began going out of his way to learn more about his D.A.D.A Professor. What he learned only fed his respect and interest in him. True, Harry would never be the intellectual that Severus was, but he was smarter than he'd previously given him credit for. He also had a very unique way of looking at things that made him invaluable as a sounding board, often pointing out avenues that he himself wouldn't have considered. He was also one of the few people that would still play chess with him. Most became frustrated with never winning. Potter just became more determined to succeed where so many others had failed. As a result Severus now had a partner whenever he fancied a match.

He looked at the time. It was early yet and he wondered if the young man was still too annoyed with him to play a match now. Come to think of it, he hadn't seen him at dinner. Was he even awake? That he might still be feeling the effects of the sleeping potion was a slightly disturbing thought. Then again he had, however unwittingly, taken quite a large dose. Severus had never taken that much and he still had almost a foot on Harry. _"Perhaps I should go check on him." _He thought to himself,_ "Or maybe I could get Professor Weasley to do it. Of course then I might have to explain exactly what might be wrong with him. No, best to do it myself."_ With that he got up and went in search of Potter. He'd hand out a few detentions to make up for the inconvenience.

It didn't take long to get to Potter's quarters, but it did take longer to get into them that night. Not only had he remembered to charm his apartment for intruders, but he'd made some improvements as well. He made a mental note of that to add to his observations. Being able to maintain mental faculties even under 'the influence' so to speak, was a definite plus and a vast improvement over Dreamless Sleep, which was akin to being in a coma. That was a promising development indeed.

Severus did get in, eventually, and when he did it was to find Potter passed out face down on the couch. He breathed a sigh of relief as it was apparent the young man was still breathing, and very deeply at that. Erring on the side of caution, Severus checked his pulse as well. All was normal. He thought about waking him, but wasn't terribly inclined to learn what his reception would be so, instead, he once again put Harry Potter to bed.

Harry woke in his bed just before dawn, wondering for the second morning in a row how he'd gotten there and dying for the loo. _"Perhaps Hermione stopped by sometime yesterday," _he thought. He suddenly realized he was feeling better than he had in a long time. Even when he didn't have nightmares he was a light sleeper and usually didn't manage more than six hours a night, another habit left over from the war. This morning he felt refreshed and eager to start the day. He jumped out of bed and headed into the bathroom.

After taking a long shower he headed to The Great Hall early. He hadn't eaten for over a day and was starving. Luckily breakfast was the longest meal time due to the extreme discrepancies in everyone's schedules in the morning. Early though he was, Severus was already finished with his own breakfast when he took his seat.

"I'm glad to see you're feeling better as I cannot excuse you from classes today," Severus drawled as he stood up. "Enjoy your breakfast, Professor."

"Stupid git," Harry said to himself as Snape walked away. He began once more to plot his response to Snape's machinations. He had thought of and disregarded a number of ideas and moved onto his second plate of food before Hermione joined him. Ron must still have been on assignment.

"Where were you yesterday? Professor Snape said you weren't feeling well when I asked, but he didn't elaborate. What happened? I can't imagine what would have kept you from attending your classes, especially on the first day."

Harry had let her go on amused by the obvious influence of Molly Weasley on his best friend. She'd make a wonderful mother one day. "I spent yesterday asleep on my couch and then in my bed. As to what happened, I'm not sure I could tell you." It wasn't strictly the truth, but he was disinclined to tell her exactly why he'd been asleep for thirty six hours. "As you can see I'm much recovered and ready to attend my classes."

"'Much recovered'? When did you begin speaking so formally?" she asked looking slightly puzzled.

"Severus's influence I suppose, I hadn't really noticed it myself," Harry replied, smiling at the face Hermione made at his use of Snape's first name. No one questioned now that he had been a hero, but not everyone had warmed up to him the way Harry had over the previous six years.

"Is it wrong that I'm still somewhat weirded out at the thought of using his first name?"

"Only if he's given you leave to use it." Harry laughed as she blushed. Clearly Severus had extended that courtesy to her. "Give it awhile, you'll get used to it. He's not the same man he was when we were students."

"I know, I just keep thinking about how much harder we made his life back then."

Harry took Hermione's hand in his own. "Let it go love. He has."

"Speaking of letting go, why don't you let go of my wife's hand?" Harry stood grinning at his friend and gave him a hug.

"I thought you were still on assignment."

"Got back last night," Ron said, taking the seat on the other side of Hermione and loading up his plate with more food than Harry had managed on two. He and Hermione shared a look before bursting out into laughter. "What?" Ron said before taking a huge bite of sausage.

"Just like old times," Harry said rising from his seat. "I'll catch you two later. I need to go over my lesson plans before class." They said goodbye and Harry left the Great Hall, excited at last about starting a new term. Every year became slightly more challenging as the older students, the ones who remembered the war and it's impact on their families and the wizarding world in general, matriculated out and younger students took their places. They didn't remember and felt no loss from the deaths of family members they hadn't been old enough to know.

He got to his office to see that Severus had taken it upon himself to tidy up, knowing it would annoy him. He had a system and it worked for him no matter what anyone else thought of it. He felt better once he reached his desk and realized that the man had also left him detailed notes on the subjects he'd covered with each class and what homework he'd assigned. Something else that never changed - only Severus would assign foot long essays on the first day. Harry thought back to his own first day in Severus's class and smiled. That had given him an idea.

Classes flew by that day, but during the breaks Harry meticulously worked out the details of his plan. He spent lunch in his chambers getting everything ready so that he would be able to strike that night. It was a risky plan, but Harry was confident that Severus would take it in stride. After all, who else would be brave or foolish enough to do what he was going to do? He finished his day in an even better mood than he'd started.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling owns all things Harry Potter. We just like making her characters shag. And if there's anyone who needs a shag after the War, it's Severus Snape. Just sayin'.

A/N: Slight A/U; Snape LIVES (E?WE?) Otherwise cannon compliant (and by cannon-compliant we mean there were many trips to and from the bookshelf). NON CON NECK FONDLING! (eventually.)

"Headmaster Snape" put in an appearance at every meal in the Great Hall though he seldom sat through to the end of them. If he could have it his own way, he'd take most of his meals in the potions dungeon, but . . .. "_You __**can **__have it your way, idiot,"_he pointed out to himself, but that didn't matter. It was only appropriate to join the students for a period of time each day whether he planned to speak to them or not, so he never missed dinner.

He _would_rather take his meals in the dungeon and spend more time brewing. After a brief few moments drinking wine and eating bread, he left the Great Hall and disappeared for some meditative solace. Potions was a thorough distraction from the world, and tonight he needed a distraction. He couldn't quite figure out what it was, but something was very definitely off. Unfortunately, he couldn't find the distraction he was looking for and called it quits without really accomplishing anything.

He got back to his chambers and stopped suddenly, sensing another person. He must have been distracted earlier, because no one should've been able to get past the charms he put on his door. The fact that he must have forgotten to cast them when he left this morning was an unpleasant thought, but there were few people, open door or not, who would let themselves in. All the same, he pulled his wand before entering his sitting room and he found Potter sitting on his couch reading a potions journal.

Severus was unimpressed. "Good evening, Potter. What a delight to see you so comfortable. May I get you a drink?"

"I brought my own." he said, pulling a rather large flask from his pocket. The boy was clearly taking a page out of Moody's book. "You're more than welcome to have some if you'd like."

This sort of challenge was one Severus could readily meet. _Potter wouldn't possess the nerve to slip anything in one of my drinks._ He nodded his appreciation. "I will, thank you." Severus conjured himself a glass and allowed Harry to pour him a generous helping of clear liquid before taking a seat in his favorite chair. "Your drink, your toast."

Harry raised the flask, "To honest friends." he said before putting the flask to his lips.

Severus drank deeply from his drink, Muggle vodka by the taste of it. He winced. "Not a particular favorite of mine," he remarked just before finishing it off. "In fact, I find it one of the most unpalatable Muggle drinks." He put his glass on the table and leaned back.

"Giving up already?" Harry said putting the flask to his lips again.

Severus raised an eyebrow as he moved to the sofa to sit beside Harry. "Because Muggles don't know how to brew alcohol?" He reached over and took Harry's flask, then drank from it directly. "No."

Harry regarded the Headmaster curiously. "Where did you go during dinner?" Harry took the flask back and put it to his lips once more.

"I was in the dungeons. Brewing. Or trying to," he mumbled, disappointedly. "I felt no inspiration tonight, though. After awhile I was just reorganizing the shelves. So I left."

"Inspiration?"

"Yes, fool, inspiration," he replied, annoyed. "Creativity, vision. Imagination." He cleared his throat and looked down at the floor. "I didn't have it so I left. You're smart enough to figure such things out on your own, Harry."

Harry sat back and regarded him thoughtfully."Where do you normally turn for inspiration?" he finally asked, then added after some hesitation, "Why do you think you lacked it tonight?"

Severus stared at Harry. "No one's ever asked me anything like that before," he replied. He licked his lips and regarded the flask in Harry's hand with a hint of suspicion. "So I don't know . . .." He stared just past Harry's shoulders intensely, certain something was odd about their conversation. It was well beyond typical. "I think the inspiration might just come from the world around me. Sometimes it shuts me out. Then this happens."

"_What are you saying?"_ he thought in frustration. _"Just let it go where it will."_ Two conflicting considerations, provoked by Potter. No surprise there. It didn't help that Potter was looking at him as if this was the most interesting conversation they'd ever had. Harry put the flask back in his hand. He looked down on it. "_Is Potter trying to get me dunk as some sort of revenge? Surely even he knows my tolerance far exceeds his own."_

He took another drink from the flask and then because he simply could not help himself, "Surely even you know my tolerance far exceeds your own."

"_Of course he knows that, idiot." _he thought to himself, and then it hit him._ "He's given you veritaserum."_ An excessive quantity of veritaserum, from the feel of it. Annoyed with himself, he took care not to speak and began thinking of a way out other than the obvious move of simply removing Potter from his presence.

"Figured it out, have you?" Harry leaned back and smirked at him. _Smirked_. "Why did you dose me the other night?"

He put his hand over his mouth to keep himself from responding, focusing his mind on the problem at hand. _"Occlumency, perhaps?"_ He'd never considered it before. Of course, he seldom found himself on the receiving end of veritaserum, and never without his knowledge and complete consent. Living life as he had done, sometimes complying with the administration of veritaserum was a necessary inconvenience. He thought about it some more. If he kept his mind clear of thoughts he'd rather keep to himself, then there was no reason to think they would spill out of his mouth. Luckily, Potter had changed the subject, giving him the opportunity to test his new theory with little risk of revealing anything too personal. He thought long and hard before he removed his hand to answer him, smiling as he did so.

"I was in a unique position to alleviate you of some of your burdens."

Harry smirked. "Clever, sir. Now I'll ask you again, why did you dose me?"

"I dosed you, Potter, because I cannot afford to have my Defense Against Dark Arts Professor showing up in class unable to perform a simple disarming spell due to lack of sleep." He replaced his hand quickly before other reasons came out as well.

"You are aware of my reasons for not indulging in such potions?"

"Yes, I am." He paused, concentrated on blocking out those thoughts that he did not wish have come out of his mouth that night (or ever, really). He thought instead on why Potter was so adamant about not taking them, namely the side effects and addictive qualities.

"Why did it last so long?"

"You drank a much larger dose than I'd planned to administer." The words came out slowly as he concentrated on what his response would be if Potter hadn't dosed him. "I hadn't anticipated your enthusiasm for elf made wine. Indeed, I don't believe I've ever seen you so thirsty." Harry had the decency to blush at that remark. "I'm lucky I have any left."

"The potion was in the wine? I didn't taste any potion in the wine."

"You didn't taste it because I designed it to be tasteless." They were beginning to stray into a murky area, but now Severus wanted to see how much longer he could combat the effects of the truth serum. If it became too difficult he could always just cast a silencing charm on himself until the effects wore off or go back to Plan A: toss the whelp out on his ass. He was also pervertedly curious as to where Potter might want to take this if he continued to play along. After all, he knew that anything revealed tonight would be treated as a confidence.

"You designed?"

Severus put his hand on his mouth and nonverbally _Accioed_ his journal and self inking quill. He turned to the next to last page and made a few notations before removing his hand from his mouth. "Yes, I designed. I myself have...sleep...issues and have spent a great deal of time researching a non habit forming sleep potion." He made another note in his journal. Harry looked as if he didn't know which questions he should be asking next. Severus wondered if Harry had ever actually planned on getting any answers at all or if this had been little more than a score evener. If that was the case, who knew where it would to lead? Oh yes. This was going to be fun, indeed.

"You're taking notes?"

"I've a new theory I'm testing out." His efforts were getting easier; answers were coming out short and to the point.

"A new theory?"

"Yes."

"Care to elaborate sir?"

"Not at this time, but you could help me by telling me the ratio of veritaserum to vodka, and the brewer of course." Severus made another note then looked over at Harry expectantly.

Harry considered this for a moment before answering, "Absolut, I think."

"No you dunce, the veritaserum." Apparently Occlumency does not protect you from making smart ass retorts.

"Oh. You want to know who brewed the Veritaserum? I hadn't realized that's what you were asking." Potter's smirk made another appearance. Eyebrow raised, he answered. "You did. As for the ratio . . .." Harry raised his arm to his neck and rubbed it awkwardly. "I didn't really measure and I've put an Un-Detectable Extending charm on the flask, so I don't really know."

Severus rolled his eyes. "Of course you don't."

"Oh, give me a break!" Potter replied in exasperation. "I didn't know this was going to turn into a science experiment!"

"What did you think was going to happen?"

"I don't know!" Potter exclaimed. "I guess I assumed that you'd toss me out on my ass as soon as you'd realized what I'd done."

"Well I didn't and you're not going to get this opportunity again, so I suggest you make the best of it." Severus said before slapping his hand once more across his own mouth. Where in the world that declaration had come from he didn't want to ponder, but he was having fun. Severus waited patiently for another question. Finally it came and it was not what he was expecting, Harry had in fact decided to 'make the best of it'.

"Tell me why you invited me to tea that day."

"Which day?" He knew perfectly well which day, but this definitely fell into the category of things he never wanted to talk about.

"The first time you asked me here to tea. Why did you invite me to tea that day?"

"Y..you...you're a Professor in my school," he mustered after some consternation.

"I'd been a Professor in your school for more than two years at that point. Not to mention you rarely have tea with any of the professors. Why did you ask ME to tea THAT day? What changed?"

Severus sat staring at Harry, unable to move for fear of letting slip anything regarding the memory of that day. Occlumency was beginning to fail him, but he still managed to provide an excuse. It only opened up another question, though. "Your performance was impressive."

"My performance?" Harry grinned at him, "Just what performance are you referring to Headmaster?"

Severus looked away. The brat was going to win this little game, he realized, but he wasn't ready to give up just yet. "You punished students adequately . . . excessively, actually – even by my own standards." _"Why are you even speaking?" _he asked himself. He should be keeping his mouth shut. Instead, he was trying to make up lies. He wasn't just compelled to tell the truth, he was compelled to respond whenever he was spoken to. No torture or coercion for answers that may or may not be true. It was just a simple draught. It was an impressive batch of veritaserum. A really, _really_ impressive batch. A potion like this, he realized, could end war if used appropriately. It could also be used to eliminate privacy, control people, and _start_ wars. He was suddenly _very_ relieved he didn't brew for the Ministry. Their ethical track record was abhorrent. He hoped Potter still had the bottle so he'd know what batch number was used.

"What punishment are you referring to, sir?"

Severus bit his lip and swallowed, his mouth suddenly dry. Occlumency be damned, he decided as he took another sip of the vodka. Potter would be merciful. When he grew uncomfortable, they would stop. "You deducted two hundred points from Gryffindor because two teenage boys were _picking_ on someone. You impressed the Slytherin. Which makes up quite a great deal of me, as you know."

"I only did what was right."

"It was right to deduct 200 points from Gryffindor because two teenagers called me names you yourself have repeated probably a hundred times?"

"You deserve the respect you've earned."

"I notice you weren't terribly inclined to dish it out while I was actually earning it."

"I was a git back then."

"Truer words have never been spoken."

"Now, on the other hand..." The young man trailed off, not finishing the sentence.

It hadn't been a question, but once again he found himself speaking before he could help himself. "Now you are an intriguing young man. You've shown greater depths than I imagined you could possibly possess, you prove yourself not only as a teacher, but as a person on an almost daily basis. I am...grateful for your...friendship." Without waiting to see his reaction, Severus looked down and began making copious notes in his journal.

Harry leaned back and watched the man methodically document this "experiment" as it had turned out to be. Not only was he seemingly going to get away with dosing Professor Severus, but the man had given him carte blanche to appease his own curiosity. He also seemed to be terribly amused by the whole thing, happy almost, that this was the tack he had taken. Even after tapping into his inner Slytherin Harry'd still managed to bungle his attempt at revenge. "_I really should just stop trying_," he thought.

But then he remembered why he'd thought of the little plan in the first place and realized that he still didn't have the answer to the question he'd originally asked. Sure, Severus wanted him alert when surrounded by hormonal teenagers wielding wands and yes, he'd probably been very interested in noting how he would respond to his creation, but Harry couldn't shake the feeling that there was something else. Something he was missing. He decided to press his luck again.

"So why did you dose me the other night?" He said it casually, hoping that he would finally catch Severus completely off balance.

Severus looked up from his journal, lips parted. It took him a moment to answer. "You needed help I could provide." His face was expressionless. "You shouldn't be miserable."

Harry stared at him, trying desperately to read anything in Severus's face. He replayed their conversation in his mind. Severus said he had "issues" too. He knew he would not get a wholly truthful answer but there was one question which he felt needed, indeed had, to be asked. Though he did his best not to dwell on it, it was a question he'd had for a long time.

"Are _you_ miserable?"

Severus let his eyes travel slowly back down to his journal. The silence filled momentarily with the sound of a quill scribbling on parchment. It took forever for him to answer. "You need to go now."

The next month went by business as usual. By mutual unspoken consent the 'potions incident' was not discussed (not that this stopped Harry from thinking about it obsessively) and wasn't long before the two of them fell back into their easy comaraderie. September passed by more quickly than Harry had thought possible and the first week of October brought the first Dueling Club meeting of the year. He and Severus had begun the club the same year Harry had become Deputy Headmaster, ostensibly to train the newer students who hadn't been involved in The Battle of Hogwarts, but really they'd just wanted an excuse to work out their frustrations in a socially acceptable milieu. It got a little bigger every year as did the demonstration he and Severus provided at the first meeting.

Harry was actually a little nervous about this years demonstration. He knew he could defend himself. What he was less sure about now was whether or not he could attack his friend after the admissions he'd made. He knew Severus had said more than he'd planned or wanted to. The dismissal Severus had given to Harry's final question during the veritaserum incident had been just as much of an answer as anything else that might have come out of his mouth. Not only that, but Harry had had a very odd day. Not bad, just odd. He'd finally received his invitation to Ginny's wedding. He'd known that she'd gotten engaged and was sincerely happy for her, but it only highlighted his own growing sense of not quite belonging anywhere.

Harry was so deep in thought he didn't see Severus walking out of The Great Hall. He ran straight into him. Severus caught him before he could fall, holding him close to his body. They'd only been so close together once before (Harry caught Severus when he slipped on some ice in Hogsmeade). Harry's breath caught in his throat as he realized how much he missed the man's arms. Unfortunately, students were beginning to show up, and Severus let him go and stepped away from him. Harry looked up into his eyes but could discern nothing.

"Have a care about where you're going, Potter." Severus moved to pass him, but Harry prevented this.

"Where are you going Headmaster? The meeting is supposed to begin in five minutes."

"I forgot something." he said looking more than a little uncomfortable. Severus wasn't someone who normally forgot things and Harry couldn't think of anything that Severus might have forgotten that he would need for the meeting.

"What did you forget?"

"What does it matter, Potter? It's something I need for the meeting and I'm going to retrieve it." He tried again to leave, but Harry put his hand out. Severus stopped just shy of contact. "Would you _please_ get out of my way?"

"Not until you tell me what you forgot."

Severus looked down at Harry, grimacing. It pleased Harry endlessly to know he could easily get under the man's skin, as well as he knew him now. "It's really none of your business what I've left behind."

"Maybe I can help you find it," Harry suggested.

Severus's eyes rolled. "Stop acting like a child and let me go, Potter."

"What'd you lose?" Harry badgered.

"I've _lost_ nothing! I merely need to go to my office and retrieve something I need . . .." Severus sighed. "Why am I arguing with you? Get out of my way before I move you myself."

"That wouldn't be very nice, Professor. There are students around. Imagine the example you'll set?"

"I need my _wand_, Potter." Harry didn't think the man meant to say that as loud as he did, not than anyone else heard him. Still, wands are not something you leave behind, especially if you were Severus Snape.

"How did you forget your wand?" He asked incredulously.

"I was distracted," Severus ground out, trying once more to get around Harry, who simply put his hand up not quite touching Severus's chest.

"Must have been some distraction."

"Indeed, it was."

"Good thing I'm in a unique position to alleviate you of the burden of going back to your office." With a lazy flick of his wand he _Accioed_ Severus's wand and handed it to him with a small bow. "Sir?" He said holding it out. Severus snatched the wand and stormed into The Great Hall. "You're welcome," Harry called after him.

Severus turned around briefly and threw Harry a look that hadn't graced his face since Potter was a student. Harry had thought it funny, but only now was he realizing how foolish he'd been to prick Severus's ego just before a duel. If he hadn't been planning revenge before he almost certainly was now. Unfortunately, Harry had no choice but to march to his fate, whatever that might be.

The Dueling Club was open to sixth and seventh years, and only if they maintained O level marks in all of their classes. This was meant to give students a goal, but also served in keeping the membership down to a reasonable level. Usually only twenty or so students qualified. Even so, it was a miracle that more people didn't get hurt. There was also the strict code of conduct contract that all of the students had to sign. Even under the eyes of two of Britain's most powerful wizards, teenagers will be teenagers (hormonal, reckless, and arrogant) and will try to get away with what ever they can. The two Professors had learned that the hard way, and now no one dared break the rules for fear of having IDIOT written across their face in acne like boils (Hermione had been kind enough to pass the spell along to Harry).

He walked in and was surprised by how many students had qualified this year. Severus called the club to order as soon as Harry walked in, slamming the doors shut behind Harry with a wave of his wand. Not expecting it, Harry jumped at the sound. Severus just smirked a little before beginning the speech he recited every year at the first D.C. meeting. Harry knew it by heart so contented himself with joining Severus on the dueling platform and looking suitably serious until the last line; "Now Professor Potter and I will give you a little demonstration." At that they turned to each other and bowed. Harry did not like the glint he saw in Severus's eye before they turned to walk to their respective ends.

Severus took his position with a purpose. _"This is going to be delectable,"_ he thought, still angry. Angry at Potter for being such an impertinent, cheeky brat, but also at himself. He'd revealed far more than he'd wanted to that night in his chambers and Harry's interest hadn't helped. The young man had been empathic, something no one had ever shown him before. He'd wanted to tell him more, to spill his guts, to tell Harry everything he really thought of him. He wanted to tell him how important he'd truly become. But he hadn't said any of that, he'd told the young man to leave. He couldn't allow himself to indulge in the fantasy that Harry would treat the admissions as more than a commodity. Not that he was successful in this regard, which only angered him more and caused him to be terribly distracted.

Case in point: forgetting his wand. His _wand_. Severus never forgot his wand (what self respecting wizard did?) and then the very reason he'd forgotten his wand fell into his arms. He'd held onto him far longer than necessary, to boot, but he simply could not help himself. An opportunity like that would never come his way again. Naturally, Potter would go on to ruin it by teasing him about forgetting the wand in the first place. Teased. Him. Now the Boy-Who-Lived was going to pay and it would be Severus's pleasure to collect the debt.

He turned to face his adversary and bowed once more as etiquette demanded. Then he nailed Harry with an _Expelliamus_. The look on Harry's face as he watched his wand sail in a graceful arc to Severus's extended hand was all that he had hoped it could be. He desperately wished Dennis Creevy were here to document the moment. For all that Harry relied on the spell himself, he hadn't been expecting it then, and looked as if he'd just been told that Dumbledore was straight. Severus smirked. Tucking Harry's wand into his pocket, he gave a brief explanation on why that would be the most important spell they would ever learn. He then had the returning seventh years pair with the new members to practice, before he began walking around to monitor their progress.

Harry clearly wanted to say something about his unreturned wand, but was wise enough to keep his mouth shut and began moving through the practicing pairs as well. Severus knew this was a spell that would take most of them the night to master, so he let his thoughts roam once more.

It wasn't that he didn't trust Harry, he just didn't have a good track record. In school his friends were people who understood the value of information, (Slytherins, in other words) and future Death Eaters. He'd then joined The Dark Lord, a 'man' who not only invited your confidence, but in his early days was charming enough to encourage it as well. Once you'd revealed your secrets, he would torture you with them both to ensure your cooperation and for his own perverse pleasure. Indeed it had been his experiences with The Dark Lord that had driven him to master _Occlumency_. He'd seen how others had suffered for their transgressions, a few had gone mad, and he'd vowed he would never give The Dark Lord that type hold over him.

Of course, _Occlumency_ hadn't done him any good at all when he'd turned to Dumbledore and willingly spilled all of his secrets. Sure the old man had listened to him, been sympathetic even, but then he'd held that knowledge over his head for almost seventeen years. The fact that Dumbledore was motivated by 'The Greater Good' had not done much to alleviate the frustration of handing one mad man a weapon Severus had vowed never to hand to another. He'd also, if he were honest with himself, felt betrayed to a certain extent. He'd never trusted The Dark Lord. He _had_ trusted Dumbledore. Regardless, the result was the same; twenty years of living a life that wasn't truly his own. He would not be making that mistake again.

He turned his attention back to the students when he was almost hit in the face with a flying wand. Only a few of them were succeeding, and those that had were becoming a little overzealous in their spell casting. Severus noticed Harry helping a particularly hapless 6th year (who Severus was not entirely sure wasn't a Longbottom) in a corner. He was standing behind him with his hand over the student's, guiding him through the wand movement. Harry then whispered something in his ear and stepped back. Severus watched in wonder, barely fighting a smile, as the student disarmed his partner effortlessly.

Harry picked up the expropriated wand while the other students swarmed the whelp to congratulate him. Harry then looked Severus in the eye and pointed the wand at Severus's chest. Severus reached into his pocket wrapping his fingers around both of the wands he held there. Harry smiled at him and returned the wand to it's owner. Just then the charmed hour glass tolled the hour concluding the meeting. Severus strode purposefully out of the hall leaving Harry to dismiss the students, a tedious task as they always asked to continue or for more demonstrations.

"_Why didn't he attack me? Or at least try to get his wand back?"_ Severus thought to himself as he made his way to his chambers. The brat had thrown him off guard again. He simply couldn't fathom it. No one ever remained voluntarily wandless around him. No one. He hadn't even asked for it (not that Severus had given him the opportunity). He wrapped his fingers around Harry's wand once more and listened for footsteps behind him. He made it to his quarters having heard none.

Severus had time to remove his robes and pour himself a glass of Mead before a knock on his door finally came. He opened the door and Harry walked past him, heading to the sitting room, removing his robes along the way.

"Please, come in." Severus said closing the door and following Potter who was holding the Mead up to the light by the time he got back to the sitting room.

"Is this safe?"

"Depends on what your definition of 'safe' is," Severus said taking his favorite chair.

"I'll take that as a yes," Harry said, conjuring a glass and pouring himself a healthy measure.

"That's rather brave of you." Severus smirked.

Harry sat down on the couch stretching his legs out a bit. "Nice move tonight, by the way," Harry said, raising his glass in salute before taking a sip. Severus inclined his head, acknowledging the compliment. The evening was becoming odder by the moment. He knew the attack would come soon and that Potter was intelligent enough to stall for the element of surprise, but he couldn't seem to brace himself for it. Beyond any sense of reason, he was a little _afraid_ of what might come next. Perhaps he'd gone too far this time. He'd embarrassed Harry in public . . . in front of _students_, no less . . .. What if Potter's retaliation was more significant this time?

But what would Harry have to gain from attacking him?

No, it couldn't be that bad. Could it?

"I suspected you would appreciate it." Harry smiled as he closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the couch. Potter would always be something of a brat, he realized. He wasn't particularly uncomfortable with that probability. It was obnoxiously charming. Very, very obnoxiously charming. "So, Potter. Why are you here?" he asked with a sigh.

"What do you mean?"

"I want to know why you're here," Severus sneered.

Potter look up at him with a puzzled expression on his face. "I had a...weird day and wanted to have a drink with my friend."

Not quite convinced, Severus raised his head arrogantly and looked down on Potter. He was supposed to be angry. He was supposed to retaliate. Instead, he was casually reclining on the couch, his explanation coming across as quite genuine. "I suppose that would be . . . nice," Severus replied tentatively.

"It's good to know you enjoy my company so much," Harry quipped settling himself more comfortably on the couch. "Nice. I'd like to think I at least warrant 'entertaining'."

Severus sighed. "You're as entertaining as any other foolish Gryffindor." He finished off his glass and refilled. "Top you off?" he asked, holding up the bottle. He _wanted_ Harry to stay awhile. Offering more alcohol when Harry's glass was hardly touched, he hoped, would be an adequate way of expressing that.

"Not now, thank you. How was your day?"

His deadpan failed him and a look of utter confusion fell across his face. It was the first time in a few years he'd betrayed an emotion so effortlessly. "How was my day?" He recovered his expression. "That line of questioning is an exercise in futility, Potter. We might as well talk about the weather. Nothing of significance happened to me today. How was _your_ day?" he asked, an eyebrow raised, challenging him to come up with one interesting answer, one event worthy of discussion that he'd experienced that day.

"I received an invitation to Ginny's wedding."

That was, indeed, worthy of discussion. He couldn't discern the tone with which Harry divulged the information. This was unfortunate as he was counting on that to determine how to proceed. "Who is she marrying?"

"Lee Jordan. He and George became very close after the war, so by default became closer to all the Weasleys," he said dispassionately sitting up to look at Severus.

Severus wasn't sure how to respond. He tread as lightly as possible. "Do you regret leaving her?" He realized as soon as he finished speaking that he didn't know the details of his separation. For all he knew she had left _him_.

"We left each other. And no, there's nothing to regret. What we had was great, but it wasn't forever. For all that we were forced into adult situations, we were kids and had no real understanding of the changes the war would wreak." He stopped to sip his Mead. "As much as I love her, as much as she loves me, we just don't understand each other well enough anymore. We tried, but it wasn't meant to be."

Severus nodded. "I see," he continued hesitantly. "Why, then, is her marriage bothering you?"

"It's not really bothering me, it's just...so final. That part of my life is truly and irrevocably over. Ginny being single was one of the few things that was the same. I don't know, I guess I'm just feeling lonely," he said taking another drink.

He stared at Harry for a few seconds then looked down sharply. _"I'm just feeling lonely."_ Severus had literally never heard another soul utter anything quite like it. He felt the same way when he told himself the truth. He didn't, though, more often than not. He _couldn't_. He'd sworn to himself when he was still a student that he wouldn't get caught up in such inconsequential minutia.

He stared at his hands and mustered a response. "You have friends on staff," he suggested.

Harry smiled wistfully, "True, but only two of them understand me and one of them no longer has the time for me she once did."

Severus frowned and looked up against his will. It wasn't hard to avert eye contact, however, once he remembered how uncomfortable he was even looking away. "If you want company, I don't mind you stopping by more often for a drink." He drained another glass and filled it again. "I won't pretend to understand you, but I'm not opposed to having you here more often."

"Thank you, I appreciate that." He finished his drink and held out his glass for Severus to refill. Severus obliged him before taking a seat at the other end of the couch. Harry had closed his eyes and was leaning back again. Severus hadn't seen him that relaxed in long time.

He stared at Harry for a long time, enjoying a comfortable silence which came out of the blue. His own nervousness had disappeared with Harry's acceptance of the invitation. Now he was just trying to fight the thoughts that acceptance provoked. Part of him imagined Harry might spend considerably more time with him. Perhaps it was possible to . . .. No. It wasn't.

But Potter was still with him, drinking, wandless. Severus couldn't help wondering . . . "Why haven't you asked for your wand back?"

"Because I don't need it right now, but I would appreciate if you gave it back to me before I leave."

Severus nodded. "Of course. In fact," he began as he crossed the room. He found the wand and brought it back to Potter. "Here it is," he finished, holding it out to Harry. "No sucker punches," Severus warned, still unconvinced Harry believed he didn't need revenge.

Harry took the wand back and pocketed it. "Oh, I forgot I had these." he said pulling some candy out. "Would you like one?" He held his hand out allowing Severus to choose a piece first.

Failing to make heads or tails of Harry's offer, he simply accepted, putting his drink down before taking a piece. "Thank you." He unwrapped it and popped in in his mouth when it became evident Potter expected him to do so. He was overtaken by a most peculiar sensation before being turned, however briefly, into some sort of bird.

Harry laughed out loud. "Canary Cream." He popped a piece into his own mouth and was briefly transformed into a macaw.

Severus couldn't help himself; he smiled. "A Weasley product I assume?"

"Whose else?" Harry replied as though it were obvious. "Something told me you'd enjoy that much more than anyone might've expected," he said, grinning. "I'm glad I was right about that." Harry leaned back again, content it seemed in simply being there. "You know Severus, it wouldn't kill you to let people know you have a sense of humor."

"It might. I've seen first hand of what George Weasley is capable." This statement earned him another laugh and Severus felt extremely pleased with himself for being the reason. This night had turned out far better than he could ever have imagined. The two of them settled into a companionable silence. Severus was just about to retrieve the book he'd been reading when Harry spoke up once more.

"Would you go with me?"

"Go with you?" Severus responded not entirely sure what was being asked of him.

"Yeah, to the wedding, I mean." Harry was beginning to mumble, a sure sign he was embarrassed. "I would just rather not go alone. I think it would be less . . . I don't know . . . weird if someone were there with me. There's an open bar and I'm sure people would like to see you again. Who knows? We might even have fun."

"I wonder if it wouldn't be more awkward bringing me along," Severus admitted. "Not that . . .." He stopped and thought it over for a second. Perhaps it would be fun. Perhaps there were people who actually wanted to see him (though this seemed unlikely to him, given his projected image). Whether they wanted to see him or not, he certainly wasn't going to confess to an insecurity so profound. "On second thought, I don't see why not."

"Excellent. It's a month from next Saturday."

Severus nodded, feeling a series of odd palpitations in his chest that momentarily took his breath away. _"Am I really this nervous?" _he wondered. Indeed, he was, nervous and flattered. He tried to stop himself, though, as his mind was already wandering to further possibilities. They weren't going out in any "official" capacity; Severus was just a friend spending an evening with his friend's friends. He reminded himself how important it was to keep that in mind. "I'll mark it on the calendar."

"It's a date then."


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling owns all things Harry Potter. We just like making her characters shag. And if there's anyone who needs a shag after the War, it's Severus Snape. Just sayin'.

A/N: Slight A/U; Snape LIVES (E?WE?) Otherwise cannon compliant (and by cannon-compliant we mean there were many trips to and from the bookshelf). NON CON NECK FONDLING!

The day of the wedding dawned cold and cloudy. Harry was excited about seeing all of his friends together, especially with the integration of Severus. He had taken the Headmaster up on his offer and they now spent several evenings a week and part of the weekend hanging out together. They talked a lot, but not all the time. There were significant periods of silence and Harry found he didn't mind this. He found it oddly comforting, in fact. For as companionable as they were, too much time with Ron and Hermione made him lonely, filled though it was with chatter. They would always be his best friends, but they'd moved on in a way that Harry hadn't yet been able to do.

After the break-up, Harry tried to go back to dating, but the activity was a nightmare. There were plenty of witches (and wizards come to that) who would gladly go out with him, but none of them seemed to want to _get to know_ him. They only wanted to be seen with him in public. They didn't understand (nor did they care to understand) why he'd rather stay in. No one wanted Harry Potter, they all wanted The Chosen One. It didn't take long for Harry to simply give up on companionship. Recently, though, he'd begun to miss it.

Harry took extra care while getting ready. He wasn't entirely sure why he thought it important to look so nice, but he did. He even managed to get his hair to lay straight. Of course by the time that actually happened he was running late. Severus was already at the Entrance Hall. Harry was glad the man's attention was on the house points and that he missed Harry's initial reaction to seeing him. Severus was wearing green dress robes. GREEN. It was the first time Harry had seen him in anything other than black and the effect was striking. He was pretty sure his jaw might actually have dropped, but he recovered himself before he was seen.

"You're late, Professor Potter," Severus drawled in jest. Then he looked at Harry curiously. "What have you done to your hair?"

"Do you like it? It's the reason I'm late actually," he said grinning like an idiot. He could not get over how well the man looked. "What have you done with your robes, Professor Snape?"

Severus buried a smirk. "They're new," he said through lightly clenched teeth. "As for the hair," he started. "One grows accustomed to certain things." He reached over and messed up Harry's hair. "I liked it. It was nice."

Harry caught his breath when Severus began running his hands through his hair. It was something he'd always been a sucker for and Severus seemed to be a master at, his long fingers lightly grazing his scalp. It stopped as suddenly as it started and Harry slowly let out his breath. _"I wish he hadn't stopped,"_ he thought to himself. He wondered where that thought came from. "Well, I could get used to those robes, sir. They're very . . . nice," he finally managed to get out.

Severus looked down, surveying his robes. "Quite," he responded. He put his hand on Harry's shoulder and shoved him toward the door.

They apparated to The Burrow with little time to spare. The back yard had been transformed into a fairy tale with a magical marquis. It was like entering a meadow in springtime giving the appearance of still being outside with lights strewn everywhere creating an ethereal glow. Even after all this time magic like this still took Harry's breath away. There were chairs laid out in rows and people were already being seated. They were approached by Ron who insisted that they sit with the family. Judging from their initial reactions Ron had not seen fit to warn them who his escort would be that evening. Luckily the wedding began before more than pleasantries could be exchanged.

The ceremony was short and to the point. Ginny was beautiful, positively radiating with happiness. Arthur beamed proudly. Lee looked like the happiest man on the planet with his best man George placing a close second. Hermione, Molly, and Fleur were all in tears by the end of it. In short, it was perfect. Then the real party began as a dance floor appeared, the chairs were moved to the tables set around the perimeter and music started playing.

They made their way to the bar for a drink. The tables were filling up rather quickly and there was already a line at the buffet. Severus handed Harry his drink. "Why don't you find us some place to sit while I take care of the food." He shoved Harry for the second time that night towards a table in the corner. Harry grinned and made his way to The Chosen Table and secured seats for himself and Severus. He was shortly joined by Hermione.

"Is the Headmaster really wearing green, or is it a trick of the light?" She asked incredulously while adjusting her hair.

"He's really wearing green," Harry confirmed, "I think they're nice. Don't you?"

Hermione looked over to where Severus was fixing their plates. Harry used that as an excuse to do the same. Watching Severus deftly balance the two plates in one hand as he filled them brought him back to that moment when the man had run his fingers through his hair. He wondered again at his wish that it had gone on longer. It wasn't the first time he'd found himself attracted to a man, but he'd been surprised to have that reaction to _Severus_. He really did need to get back in the game, but the last thing he needed to do was alienate one of his best friends by allowing himself to succumb to a crush on them.

"They _are _nice," Hermione said, turning back to Harry just as Severus began making his way over with the food. "I wonder what inspired him to suddenly adopt color in his wardrobe?" Facing Harry, she didn't notice Severus's approach and jumped a little when she heard his response.

"Green's my favorite color," Severus offered as he put a plate down in front of Harry and took the seat beside him. "And how does one introduce something such as color gradually?" Severus replied, mildly defensively.

Hermione looked thoughtful at that and finally said, "I never thought of it like that, and I guess that as a man it would be harder to sort of ease into it using accessories or something."

Leave it to Hermione to analyze and dissect such an innocuous topic as Severus's wardrobe as if they were discussing a potion.

"Indeed," Severus replied with a small smile. "I suppose I could see where it might come as a bit of a surprise," he admitted.

"A bit, yes," she said, "But I like it. You look very handsome tonight, Headmaster." She blushed at that last bit, but Harry realized she was right. Severus did look quite handsome, especially as he was also blushing (though he tried to hide it with his hair). _"Stop that,"_ he scolded himself. Luckily they were all spared the task of saying something when Ron showed up, three plates in hand, taking the seat between Severus and Hermione.

"Can you believe this spread? This is almost as good as Hogwarts. I don't think I've ever seen such a huge cake. I wish I had more sisters. This is the best wedding I've ever been to! OW!" Ron exclaimed as Hermione kicked him under the table. "Not what I meant, luv," he said, taking a bite of chicken. He'd barely swallowed when he looked over at Severus, "Nice robes, mate."

Severus looked over at Ron and glared at him seriously for a few moments. His deadpan broke quickly as he watched fear spread over Ron's face. Harry and Hermione joined in the laughter. "I'm oblivious to something again, aren't I?" Ron asked. Hermione nodded.

Severus sat alone at the table watching Harry dance with Luna Lovegood who was dressed in a most violent shade of violet. He took that as his cue to refill his and Harry's drinks. Luna Lovegood was hardly competition. _"No. This isn't a date. You are just his friend."_ He was waiting for his drinks, watching Harry again, when Minerva appeared suddenly at his side.

"It's nice to see that you and Potter have finally gotten over your differences," she said, quietly startling him. "Nice to see that you've finally learned to relax. I think that might be the first time I've ever succeeded in sneaking up on you, Severus." The bartender handed Severus his drinks and looked at McGonagall inquiringly. "Firewhiskey, neat."

"It still amazes me that a woman as dignified as you can drink me under the table when it comes to Firewhiskey."

"I'm older and have had more practice," she replied, elbowing him in the side. Harry was leaving the dance floor and Severus's eyes followed even as he pretended to give his former colleague his complete attention. "Go on Severus, it's time you enjoyed yourself." With that she took her own drink and left him to return to his date. _"Friend,"_ he reminded himself. He reached the table before Harry only to find himself face to face with George Weasley. They just stood there awkwardly staring at each other for a moment.

"Lovely wedding," Severus finally managed.

"Yeah." George replied. "Um, well..."

"I'm sorry about that, by the way," Severus said, indicating where George's ear used to be with out really looking at him at all.

"That's OK. Thanks for not killing me."

"You're welcome."

They stood there for a moment longer, George seeming to size him up, Severus looking anywhere but George. After a moment George stuck out his hand. Severus looked at it and then looked at George. He put the drinks on the table and hesitantly shook the young man's hand. He was surprised to be met with nothing but a firm grasp.

"What, no buzzer?" Severus smirked.

"Nah, Mum banned all wheezes from the wedding," he replied absentmindedly.

"Remind me to thank her," Severus drawled. George burst into laughter as he realized with whom he was having this conversation. Harry, Luna, and Ginny walked up just as he was settling down. Without thought, Severus handed Harry his drink.

"Oh, Professor!" George said quickly. "I forgot! I have your award. I need to make sure I get it to you."

Severus looked back at George curiously. "Which award is that?"

"Order of Merlin, of course! First Class!" he added with enthusiasm. "When you didn't show up to the presentation I, uh, accepted on your behalf. You missed a helluva a speech."

Severus scowled at the entire idea of the award. "Feel free to take your time with that. I'm no longer concerned with meaningless political endowments. I would, however, like a copy of the speech if it's available."

George laughed again. "You're right Harry, he's not the same man he used to be." George said wiping tears from his eyes. Severus was saved from having to reply to this by Ginny who, grabbed his hand. "I believe this is my dance Professor Snape."

"I don't really dance, Miss We-Mrs. Jordan," Severus said trying to politely reclaim his hand.

"Neither does Harry, but that doesn't stop him." Severus looked over to Harry who had sat down with Luna and was watching the exchange with a goofy grin on his face.

"Yes, but perhaps it should."

"It's my wedding day, Professor Snape, are you really going to say no?" Severus sighed in resignation and let his former student drag him onto the dance floor. At least it was a slow song.

They danced in silence while the young woman studied him intently. He was beginning to grow uncomfortable when she finally said something.

"I'm glad you came to my wedding, Professor Snape."

"It has been entirely my pleasure, I assure you." She gave him a crooked smile in return encouraging him to continue, "I hope you're not sick of hearing it, but you look absolutely radiant today."

"A woman never gets tired of hearing that Professor Snape."

"It's Severus, please. You are no longer a student or a child Mrs. Jordan," he said somewhat stiffly.

"Alright Severus, but only if you call me Ginny. Or at the very least, Ginerva, but you're the only person who's allowed to call me that," she warned him, laughing at the look he'd had on his face when she suggested he call her Ginny.

"Very well then. Ginerva," he replied. The music ended and Severus's eyes unconsciously scanned the crowd looking for Harry. He spotted him just where he left him, still talking to Luna and George, who looked quite comfortable together.

"Yes, they're quite a pair aren't they? I'm very curious as to where that will lead." He looked down at her unaware that she'd so easily followed his attention. She looked up at him and held his eye, her own twinkling as if sharing an inside joke with him. "They aren't the only ones I'm curious about." Severus felt the color draining from his face; Minerva working things out was one thing, one of his former students quite another. She gave his arm a reassuring squeeze. "Don't worry. No one else sees and I won't tell, but if you break his heart I _will _break your legs." With that she flashed him a dazzling smile and went off in search of her new husband. Severus smirked at her retreating form. _"The girl has brass, I'll give her that,"_ he thought to himself as he wended his way back to his table.

He had barely made it off the dance floor before he was intercepted by Arthur and Molly Weasley. He'd seen them only a handful of times in the intervening years and always at a distance. He'd never felt comfortable approaching them knowing all he'd put the family through over the years. He was saved from having to say anything as he was pulled into a very fierce hug by Molly.

"Thank you so much for saving George, I don't know what we would have done if we'd lost both of them. And for taking care of the children when you were Headmaster! It would have been so much worse if you hadn't been there. I don't even want to imagine! And I'm sorry I was so short with you all those times." He was startled by her outburst. He knew he wouldn't be shunned tonight, but he had never dreamed of the acceptance he'd actually received and was at a loss at how he was meant to respond. Arthur took pity on him and gently pulled his wife off of him.

"Let the man breathe, Molly," he said, extending his hand, which Severus shook. "Thank you for coming tonight Severus. It really means a lot to all of us. If we'd known you'd be willing to attend we would have sent you your own invitation."

"Thank you," he said slowly, unsure of what he wanted to say exactly. "I might have been concerned any invitation I was awarded might have been merely a courtesy. It's nice to know it would have been sent in earnest."

Molly took his hands in hers, "You are welcome here anytime you want. We always have dinner on Sunday nights and we'd be pleased to see you at Christmas this year as well if you're free."

Severus nodded, surprised that anyone might consider he had Christmas plans. He further surprised himself. "I look forward to it." Molly beamed in delight and he hastily excused himself before she hugged him again. He headed back to the table. George and Luna were nowhere to be seen and Harry was doing his best to fend off the advances of an overly persistent witch.

Harry was becoming increasingly uncomfortable as the witch who'd sidled up to him was failing to take the hint he was not interested. She'd been asking rather suggestively about scars he might have acquired during the war, her chair far too close and she was leaning over him, rubbing her breasts on his arm. "I'm surprised _you _came alone," she said running her finger up his arm. "You do realize that you don't have to be alone." He tried to scoot over in his chair, but she just followed him and he was afraid he might fall off he scooted any farther.

Neither of them had noticed Severus come up behind them. He reached between them to pluck his glass off the table. "You do realize he _isn't_ alone, do you not?" he asked as he sat down in the empty chair beside Harry. "You may leave now," he said with a casual wave in her direction, not bothering to even look at her again. She glared at him a moment before she left. "You're welcome," he said.

"Thank you," Harry said, smiling while he chewed his bottom lip. He hadn't out and out said as much, but that type of situation was exactly why he'd wanted to bring a date. He looked over at the man who'd accompanied him. Severus was leaning on his elbows casually surveying the thinning crowd. He wasn't a handsome man, but there was something that Harry now had to admit he found appealing. They had grown closer over the month and Harry wondered if that wasn't in fact behind his growing attraction. If so, was that a bad thing? Harry leaned back and draped his arm around the back of Severus's chair. "What did Ginny say to you? I thought for a moment she might have upset you."

Severus spoke slowly. "Not at all," he replied. "She's a very pleasant young woman. And an exceptional witch."

"Yes, she is," he said, deciding to ignore the fact that Severus hadn't answered his question. "I noticed you weren't able to avoid Molly. Did she deplore how thin you've become?"

Severus looked a bit ill-at-ease as he responded. "Oddly enough, she didn't." He cleared his throat and picked up his drink. "I spend so much time in the dungeon, you know. The heat and the way things smell . . . not always conducive to eating. And I get carried away, as well. I spend a great deal of time working," he said, defensively.

"Just wait, before you know it she'll be sending you pies on a weekly basis," he said reaching for his own drink, which Severus slid into his hand. "Even now that I'm back at Hogwarts I haven't been able to convince her that I get enough to eat."

Severus nodded. "I'll take extra care to eat, then. I'm not big on pies."

Harry laughed. "Just do what I do," Severus turned to look at him. "Give them to Ron. He can't get enough of them. I've often wondered if he didn't have an undetectable extending charm put on his stomach at some point." That earned him a smile. Harry liked being able to do that. Severus went back to people watching. He looked relaxed and Harry was glad. He'd been a little afraid that Severus would feel uncomfortable being around everybody again. Every living member of The Order had been invited and all had stopped Severus at one point or another. Severus wasn't generally comfortable with sentiment and might have easily been overwhelmed, but it seemed that everybody was showing restraint in the hopes of keeping him around.

The more he thought about it the happier he was that he'd asked Severus to join him this evening. Contrary to what he expected, Severus seemed to be enjoying the event. Harry never thought he'd be the catalyst for Severus's integration back into society. He certainly never thought he'd see Severus dance. There was a time when he'd jerk away if anyone so much as touched him. Harry wondered if he could convince Severus to dance with him. Another slow song came on and he figured now was as good a time as any to find out. He stood up and held out his hand.

"Will you dance with me Severus?" he said giving him his best smile.

Severus looked up at Harry then surveyed the room. After a glance at the floor, he stood up and addressed Harry awkwardly. "That might appear somewhat unusual," he replied.

Harry shrugged and took his hand. "So?" He pulled lightly on Severus's hand; the man stood firm.

"Harry," Severus sighed. "Ginerva strong-armed me into dancing with her. I really would rather not," he explained, treading lightly, it seemed.

Harry was disappointed but didn't want to press the issue. He looked around the thinning crowd again. It seemed the party was coming to a natural conclusion. He sighed. "Well let's go home then. If you're not going to dance with me there's no point in staying." He jokingly offered his arm to Severus who merely gestured for him to precede him, which he did.

They soon found themselves outside of the grounds of Hogwarts. Severus remained quiet during the walk back to the castle. Several times Harry considered starting up a conversation, but Severus seemed to be content with the silence. He didn't get the impression anything had been spoilt by their final interaction at the wedding, which was an incredible relief. He couldn't afford to lose the only friend who really . . . got it.

"Did you enjoy yourself?" Harry asked as they entered the castle.

Severus turned to him and, after a moment of hesitation, nodded. "It was . . . agreeable."

Harry scoffed. "I think you mean _brilliant_," he insisted. Severus gave him an odd glance. "Oh, come off it, Severus, you had a good time."

Severus stopped walking and stared at Harry for a moment. "Alright. I think it may have been more fun than anything I've ever done, honestly. Which is a little . . .." He cleared his throat. "Let's just leave it. I prefer not to preoccupy my mind with how much fun I _haven't_ had."

Harry's stomach sank. Severus's admission was as bitter as it was sombre. He wished he'd had a better sense of when to stop pushing Severus, but after so many years, he still hadn't quite figured the man out. He believed Severus would forgive him, though. He always did. But how? He'd pay Severus a compliment, he decided, something significant and something honest. He could forget making any statements of regret. Severus would only hear pity and that was an emotion he sincerely loathed.

"That never occurred to me," Harry said, and it truly hadn't. "It's just that I have so much fun with you."

Severus's head tilted curiously. "Thank you. Now if you'll excuse me, I should get back to my chambers," he said, turning away.

"I'll walk you," Harry offered before thinking.

Severus stopped and turned back. "I'm capable of finding my way back."

Harry laughed. "I just thought we could talk a bit more before we went our separate ways. Perhaps have a drink?"

He wished Severus didn't look as un-enthused as he did when he replied. "Alright." He turned away again and walked quickly toward his chambers. Harry had to take two steps to every one of Severus's in order to keep up. He might have found himself half a mile behind if he hadn't. He was surprised he wasn't winded by the time they reached their destination.

He followed Severus in and went to the cabinet in the corner where he pulled out two glasses and a bottle of Firewhiskey. He poured and turned back to Severus who had already settled into his favorite chair and was unbuttoning the collar of his dress robes. Harry stared as Severus absentmindedly pushed the collar wide exposing the scars on his neck and the very top of his chest. As though sensing he was being watched, Severus slowly looked up and met Harry's eyes. He quickly made to bring his collar together. Harry hurried forward, depositing the drinks on the table. He took Severus's hands away from his collar and pushed it wide again.

He knew Severus was uncomfortable, but had no problem justifying his actions, if only to himself. _"He needs to relax and learn to trust people,"_ he thought. That justification also made it easier to swallow his sudden compulsion to touch the man. Then, almost as if it had a mind of its own, his right hand reached out and he felt his fingers tracing the scars along the left side of Severus's neck. The man sat frozen, his expression giving away nothing. His hands had drifted back to his lap. He stared at Harry.

Harry brought his eyes back to Severus's. For a moment he thought he saw something there, but then they were closed to him once more. Harry nervously licked his lips and leaned forward slowly, giving the man plenty of time to stop him. He didn't. Harry moved his hand up to Severus's jaw and gently kissed him. He pulled back hoping to see something - anything - in Severus's eyes to indicate how big a mistake he'd just made.

"Why did you do that?" The man sounded almost as if he were afraid.

"Because I wanted to know what it felt like," Harry said simply. "I just wanted to."

"I think we should call it a night, Potter," Severus said looking away from him. Harry stepped back, hurt. He hadn't imagined that he'd simply be dismissed like that, but he'd pushed far enough tonight, perhaps far enough for the next year, and acceded to the man's wishes. As slowly as he could get away with, he showed himself out.


	4. Chapter 4

Severus sat staring at the fire, nursing a glass of Firewhiskey. Though he never would have imagined drinking enough at the party to get carried away, he still made a conscious effort to avoid letting drink provoke any stupid mistakes like the one Potter made. Again he was reminded of how young and impetuous Potter still was (and, it was beginning to seem, would always be). It was infuriating sometimes, but it'd never been as maddening as it was that evening.

It was a mistake to admit to a dull life in front of a man like Harry Potter. The result would naturally be a kiss for pity, and pity was a sentiment Severus despised above all others. He sighed. He should have just told Potter he'd had fun (it was true, anyway). He should have simply agreed with anything Harry had to say so that they could part ways and move on with their lives. He wished for the first time in awhile that he still felt the same apathy toward Potter he had when they first began working together. Disappointments were harder to come by when one was an expert brewer of potions spending one's life holed up in a dungeon. Spending so much time with someone like Potter - someone so companionable and intriguing, someone so fascinating and handsome and . . . _confident_. . .. That was what thrust on Severus this absurd attachment which so often caught him outside of his element. Unfortunately, that was also what had turned his evenings of friendly conversations and healthy competition and even companionable silences into a necessary activity. He finished off his drink and poured another.

Potter had too much to drink. Plain and simple. He was young and sociable and he couldn't seem to find anyone who wanted what he had to offer outside of celebrity. Having a modicum of self-respect, he'd chosen to eschew pursuing shallow relationships, but he wasn't the type to be content to do without sex. Severus always realized this about him but he hadn't considered the possibility Potter might be tempted to pursue a one-off with him if he were drunk enough. The fact that he would hurt his feelings. How could Harry, after the amount of work they'd done to make things right - to go _beyond_making things right - consider risking throwing it all away for nothing?

And, of course, he was growing more infatuated with Potter by the minute as a result of that kiss . . . that _mistake_. Where were they to go from there? How does one bounce back from something so unsettling? Most importantly, how was Severus to go back to business as usual with Potter? Unfortunately, the most sensible route seemed to be to call off their visits and literally go back to business as usual. That was the very last thing he wanted not just for their relationship, but for _himself_.

He drained another glass and grew less angry, though he certainly wasn't making himself any happier. For once things were changing in his life for the better - _genuinely_ for the better - and agreeing to go to some inane party turned out to be detrimental to his progress. He knew better than to make such a careless error.

He poured a quarter of a glass, drained it, then filled the next glass nearly to the brim. He stood and removed his robes and relaxed on the couch. "Why are you so bloody persuasive?" Severus moaned to the irritating vision of Potter in his mind's eye. For no particular reason, he stared at the hands of the clock on the wall and let his mind wander back to the kiss. It didn't take long for it to wander to other places; the couch he was laying on, the bed, the floor . . . _hisdesk_.

He took another drink and tried to clear his head of any inconvenient thoughts. It wouldn't do to become physically obsessed with Potter, as well.

"_? Thatwouldbeinteresting."_

Giving up, he drained another glass and let his hand travel down to his belt. Potter would wake to regret kissing him and they could go back to the way things were before - nods in the hall and pleasantries. What Potter didn't know about what Severus thought about wouldn't hurt either of them.

He closed his eyes, licked his lips and got on with it.

Harry didn't see Severus at all on Sunday. He wasn't at any of the meals (which was unusual) and he didn't respond when Harry knocked on his door (which wasn't so unusual). So instead of talking to who he wanted to be talking to, he ended up hanging out with Hermione and a very hungover Ron. While entertaining, it wasn't nearly as entertaining as what he wished to be doing. Luckily Hermione was more than willing to carry on the conversation with minimal input from the boys as she recounted every single detail of the wedding. Harry let his mind wander.

Severus hadn't _stopped_ him from kissing him, but he hadn't really kissed back either. Harry didn't think that Severus had been mad. If he had been he simply would have hexed him. As unpleasant as that might have been, at least he would have known where he stood with the man. Not that Harry was all that sure where he wanted Severus to stand in regards to him. He drew his attention back to the conversation when he heard Severus's name mentioned.

"Someone was actually hitting on Snape?" Ron said as if it were the most ridiculous and repulsive idea in the world.

"_Professor_ Snape," Harry couldn't help himself from saying. "And why wouldn't someone hit on him? He_is_ a war hero and a lot less scary than he used to be."

"Still mate, he's not exactly..." Ron trailed off unsure of how to complete his sentence.

"I think Ron is trying to point out that the Headmaster it not the most, uh, handsome of men." Hermione said blushing ever so slightly

"I wouldn't have put it quite like that, but yeah," Ron agreed with his wife.

"He's not ugly though, especially now that he's relaxed a bit and isn't scowling all the time." Harry couldn't prevent himself from defending his friend (or whatever he was now that Harry had kissed him). _"Itwasn'tabadkissasfarasfirstkissesgo,"_ he thought to himself.

"Still, it's Sn- Professor Snape. I guess it's just weird to think of him in that way," Ron replied.

"I suppose so," Harry conceded. "So what happened?"

"Well, as I was saying, Severus was at the bar getting a drink. While he was waiting one of Fleur's cousins walked up and started chatting to him. She pulled out all the stops - full Veela charm to the front - and he just acted oblivious. It was if they'd been talking about the weather when he left her there. She seemed very put out." Hermione ended the story triumphantly.

"He turned down one of Fluer's cousins?" Harry asked somewhat surprised. He knew Severus didn't date much, but he was a man; needs and all that.

"I knew it. He's gay," Ron declared. "Either that or too repressed for his own good."

Harry wasn't sure how to respond to that so he just laughed a little when Hermione started giggling. Shortly after he retired to his own chambers. He was now even more confused than he'd been before.

Monday was hectic, like Mondays tend to be, and the day seemed to go by faster than any time turner. He was exhausted by the end of it, but still looking forward to his monthly meeting with Severus to discuss how the school year was going and tend to administrative matters. It would be the first time they'd be alone since Saturday night and Harry was hoping that he might be able to get Severus to talk about it. Harry needed to know whether or not to get his hopes up at all. The past few days had been more frustrating than any he'd had in a long time.

Harry got to the Headmaster's office early, summoned a pot of tea and with no real thought poured a cup for each of them before taking a seat in front of the desk. He looked up at Albus's portrait. Where the other portraits generally pretended to be asleep during these meetings, Albus had no compunction on joining in whether he was asked to or not. If nothing else the man took excellent notes which had often come in handy.

"How are you tonight, Albus?" Harry asked.

"Doing very well Harry, thank you for asking," Albus replied. "And yourself?"

"Oh, you know me," Harry answered noncommittally. Even though the man was dead Harry still couldn't lie to him and often had to repress the urge to spill his guts every time he spoke with him. Of course Albus's presence would make it that much harder to talk to Severus about anything personal. Both of them were still too weary from their past dealings with the man to ever take him back fully into their confidence. Severus especially.

"I certainly do, my boy," Albus replied, giving Harry a look that spoke clearly that he knew quite a bit.

Harry was saved from responding by Severus's arrival. He paused briefly in the doorway taking in the scene before sitting at his desk. He picked up his tea cup and was about to take a sip before he stopped to look at Potter.

"Is this safe?"

"Yes." Harry took a big sip of his own tea and did his best to avoid Albus's eye. He really didn't need to know that they'd taken to slipping potions into each other's drinks.

"Then we should get on with it," Severus stated as he picked up a quill and looked at Dumbledore in his peripheral.

Harry was startled by Severus's abruptness, usually they chatted a bit with Albus before getting down to it, but it was Monday for Severus as well and perhaps the day had been as hectic as his own. Besides, it would be easier to talk in private later and the faster they got their work done the faster they could leave. There wasn't much to cover this month; everything was running smoothly, there'd been no major injuries, and the Board of Governors was well pleased with how things were going under Severus's leadership. All in all, the meeting took less than half an hour. In all that time, Severus never looked him in the eye once.

Once the meeting adjourned, Severus gestured for Harry to follow him to his quarters using the back entrance from his office. Harry took that as a good sign. It made sense not to speak in front of the former headmasters and now they were going to have a chance to do it properly. Not only that, but the venue would be far more conducive to finishing (or at least moving forward with) what he started on Saturday night.

Severus entered the room, crossed to the fireplace and stood behind the chair. With a bit of effort, he managed to project the aloof arrogance he was known for. He was surprised quite truly that he was able to pull it off fairly easily. It'd been so long since he'd felt the need to behave as he was. "I think it's best if we suspend our evenings together for awhile."

"Why?" Harry asked, sounding hurt and confused. "I enjoy spending time with you, and I thought you did as well."

It was awhile before he could gather his thoughts well enough to conceive of a polite way to tell Harry they needed to stop seeing one another. The answer he provided was meant to appear a polite brush-off. "December is a very busy time for me. I just won't have much free time before the first of the year."

"I see. Will you be able to join me for a drink tonight at least? There are things I'd like to discuss with you and I'd rather not wait until the first of the year," Harry said carefully.

Severus shook his head. "I'm afraid it will have to wait."

"Is this about Saturday night?"

Again, he was caught off guard and couldn't process what to say in a reasonable period of time. He finally figured out how to be diplomatic. "I had a good time Saturday and I think that's enough for awhile." Severus looked away and continued. "I wouldn't want to...well, it's enough for awhile."

Harry stared at the man, absolutely dumbfounded. "It's enough for awhile? Are you serious?" Severus watched helplessly as the young man sat himself on the couch looking very much like he was planning on taking up a residence of some duration. "Did you not enjoy our kiss?"

With great effort, Severus gave away nothing of his feelings as he replied. "Leave it alone, Mr. Potter."

"No."

"Then get out."

"Dammit Severus! Why can't you just tell me what you really mean? I'm tired of guessing! And I may not be a master Legillimens, but I know you well enough to know you're not telling me everything. These may not be lies you're telling, but they certainly aren't truths!" Harry burst out. Then almost as an afterthought he mumbled, "Why don't you trust me?"

The deadpan was growing more difficult to maintain. He came closer to Harry and spoke with a still jaw. "The truth is I'm as tired of hinting as you are of guessing." He was inches from Harry, teeth clenching, as he snarled, "Now go away."

Harry sat there for a moment longer staring up at him. Severus saw every emotion that crossed the young mans face and clenched his fists at the effort it was taking to keep his own face impassive. Finally the boy sighed, got up, and showed himself out.

Harry left Severus's quarters more confused and dejected than any sixteen year old could hope to emulate. He knew that there was more going on than the man had let on, but he couldn't wrap his mind around what it might be. He roamed the corridors aimlessly taking his frustration out on the students foolish enough to be out after curfew handing out detentions and docking points with abandon. He wasn't paying attention to where he was going and found himself in a corridor he'd never much paid attention to before. He knew of it's existence, but had never bothered to explore as no one ever seemed to use it. He'd often marveled that it was the only place on the Marauder's Map were people _weren't_. With nothing better to do with his time and too many thoughts to try to sleep, he decided tonight would be the perfect time to find out what was down here.

He opened doorway after doorway. The rooms were unused classrooms, a number of them filled with assorted odds and ends. Old desks, chairs, books, there was even a particularly decrepit suit of armor in one. The last room however was almost completely empty except for a large mirror. Harry walked in after some trepidation. He was pretty sure he knew which mirror it was, even though he thought he'd seen it destroyed as a first year student. He approached it from behind unsure if he wanted to look into it or not. He used to know what the reflection would be, but now he wasn't so sure.

Then again, maybe it could help sort out what he was and wasn't actually feeling. It showed one 'the deepest, most desperate desire of our hearts'. That's what Dumbledore said, anyway, and he was usually right about these sorts of things. He said also that it had driven men mad. But it might be able to show him if Severus figured into his deepest desires or was just a passing fancy. But could the mirror tell the difference? Harry didn't know and his curiosity was such now that he couldn't have turned back even if he'd wanted to. Screwing up his courage and closing his eyes he stepped around to stand in front of the mirror.

He opened his eyes slowly then jumped when he did indeed see Severus's reflection behind his own. He turned around just to check, but Severus was not actually standing behind him. He turned back to his reflection and Severus's, who seemed to be chuckling a bit at his actions. Then the Severus in the mirror turned to his reflection and began kissing him. It wasn't the gentle touching of lips that Harry had instigated, but rather a full on assault of the senses. Just watching what kissing, really kissing, Severus might be made Harry more than a little hard. He couldn't help but continue watching as Severus's and his reflection became even more intimate.

He ripped himself away finally realizing how difficult it would be to walk to his rooms now, particularly if he wished to remain undetected, which he very much did. There was no way he'd be able to explain away the tell tale bulge in his robes. He pulled out the Marauder's Map to check that it was all clear and then walked as quickly as he was able to his chamber where he finally relieved the frustration the Headmaster had been causing for three days now.

Later that night, after a rather long shower, Harry sat in a chair by the fire trying to wrap his mind around the events of the last three days, what he'd seen in the mirror, in particular. Was it real? Could it be made real? Harry hoped the answers were yes. Severus hadn't answered his question about the kiss which means he hadn't been opposed. If he had, he simply would have said so or made some snarky comment about Harry keeping his hands to himself. Instead, he was again kicked out uncerimoniously. Severus only did that when Harry was getting too close to something Severus didn't want to share. He usually only abstained from sharing if he thought whatever it was would be seen as a weakness.

Did Severus think of him as a weakness? It would certainly explain his pulling away now. Now that Harry thought on it, he realized that Severus had never really let anyone close and the few he had had turned it against him, or walked away. How to prove that he wasn't going to do either of those things was the question at hand. He sat in front of the fire thinking about it for a long time. Unfortunately, the only solution he could come up with was rather unappealing; go along with Severus and act as if the past few months had never happened. He didn't like it, but he didn't want to do anything that might ruin the relationship irrevocably. For the time being, Severus was willing to see him again in January. That gave him a month to plan.

"_,"_ Harry thought to himself, still frustrated and exasperated with his friend. _"OfcourseifIknewthat, Iwouldn'tbeinthismess."_ He decided to go see Hermione and Ron. It wasn't too late, plus he and Hermione both had a planning period first thing Tuesday mornings. They could afford to stay up a little later than usual. He hoisted himself out of the chair and went to his hastily discarded robes in search of his wand. That's when inspiration truly struck. There on his sleeve was one of Severus's hairs. He grabbed his wand and ran all the way to the Weasley's chambers.

He arrived at the Weasley's out of breath and had to take a moment to catch it before knocking on the door. It took a moment, but Hermione finally answered the door.

"Harry, what's wrong?" she asked, the concern apparent on her face.

"Nothing. I just fancied a chat," he said, realizing that maybe it _was_ too late and that maybe his friends were otherwise occupied (as he himself would be if it were currently an option). "Sorry, I know it's late, I'll just catch up with you tomorrow." He turned to walk away.

"Harry, you're obviously upset about something, why don't you come in and tell me about it?" She gestured for him to come in. He followed her into the tiny kitchenette Hermione has insisted be installed in their quarters. Harry didn't blame her; the way Ron ate it helped to keep food close to hand. He took a seat while she put the kettle on and pulled out some biscuits. It wasn't long before he had a cup of tea in his hand and Hermione was sitting opposite him, the look of concern on her face reminding him very much of Molly Weasley. "Now tell me what's going on, Harry," she said.

Now that he was there he wasn't sure what to say. She was the only one he could go to for the potion he needed, but he couldn't very well tell her about why he needed it. Especially as he was suddenly struck with the realization that she might actually be able to help him with his problem if he told her about it. Not all of it, but enough to give her a theory to work from. He could ask for the potion later under the guise of needing it for class.

He took a sip of tea and a deep breath before he finally spoke. "I think I'm in love with Severus," he mumbled.

"What? You know I can't understand you when you mumble," she said reasonably.

"I think I'm in love with Severus." This time he made sure to enunciate every word; he didn't want to have to say it a third time. Hermione's eyes grew round as saucers and Harry understood a moment later why.

"That is definitely something I could have remained oblivious to," Ron said from behind him. Harry buried his head in his hands. Ron had a vague idea of Harry's open-mindedness and Ron himself was tolerant, so he knew that any objection he had would be based purely on prejudice. He hadn't planned on telling Ron until and unless there was something to tell. He certainly hadn't planned for him to find out like this. "I'm just going to get some biscuits and go."

"You know you're only allowed to eat in the kitchen," Hermione said indignantly. "You get crumbs everywhere otherwise."

"But he's talking about shagging Snape!"

"_Professor_ Snape," Harry and Hermione said in unison, laughing. Hermione stopped laughing first. "If you have such an objection to the conversation you can wait to eat your biscuits."

"But I'm hungry _now_."

"Then you'll just have to decide what's more important." Apparently it was his hunger that was most important to him as he grabbed the tin and took a seat as far away fro the two of them as he possibly could. Hermione just rolled her eyes and Harry did his best to ignore his disgruntled friend. "So. Severus, eh? I must admit I didn't see that coming."

"Neither did I, quite frankly, but now it seems like the most natural thing in the world. To me at any rate. I'm not sure what he thinks of the whole thing."

"Have you tried talking to him about it?"

"Sort of. It didn't go well," he said, blushing at the thought of kissing Severus.

"Sort of?" Ron popped in, "How do you sort of talk about being in love with someone?"

"Well, I kissed him," Harry said blushing. "After we got back from Ginny's wedding."

"You can't go around just kissing people like Snape!" Ron said matter-of-factly.

"Look Ron," Harry started, but Hermione put a calming hand on his arm and turned to her husband.

"Just because you don't think Professor Snape is attractive does not mean that others agree with you and wouldn't actually mind being, um, intimate with him."

"That's not what I meant Hermione," Ron replied more calmly than Harry could have pulled off just then. "What I mean to say is that Severus is a really, _really_ private guy. He's reserved. He's the kind of guy you have to test the waters with first. You can't just jump straight into kissing. He probably thought you were just after a one night stand."

Harry just stared at Ron. He imagined Hermione was doing the same, but couldn't be asked to check. His friend had made more sense with that one statement than he had in the entire time they'd known each other. Perhaps being around Hermione all the time was finally rubbing off on him.

It was Hermione who broke the silence first. "I think he has a point Harry."

"Always the tone of surprise," Ron teased her.

"Well, how do I test the waters, as it were?" Harry asked nervously. Sure his friend could help him, but Harry knew this was not a conversation Ron would choose to have if he could help it. It might actually be more awkward than when he had first started dating Ginny.

"I'm afraid you're on your own with that one mate." With that Ron shoved two more cookies in his mouth and left the room.

"You know Harry, I might have a book that will help you. I'm not sure because I haven't gotten around to reading it myself, but the Headmaster loaned it to me at the beginning of the year. Said I might find it interesting. Hold on." Hermione got up and hurried from the room. Leave it to her to know a book that might solve his problems. She came back shortly with a thin, leather bound volume titled _CharmsforCharming._ He took it from her hesitantly.

"_Severus_ loaned this to you?" he asked, unsure of why the man would own such a book.

"It belonged to his mother, he said. Apparently it was all the rage back in the day. There're also spells written in the margins. . .," she added with a wink.

"What ever happened to not using spells that you find handwritten in books?"

"It's different now that we know who wrote them. I also asked him point blank if there were any that should be absolutely avoided and he said, 'No. They are all innocuous.' He even wrote out a parchment for me explaining what each one does. It's tucked into the last couple of pages."

Harry checked, and sure enough there in the back in Severus's own hand was a list of spells and their uses. He looked up at Hermione who was positively beaming. "Thank you, this might come in handy."

"Your welcome. But if he ever asks where you got it I'm going to lie and say that you took it without my knowledge." Harry laughed at how frightened she looked at the prospect of Severus finding out that she'd lent him this book. They had another cup of tea while they discussed work before Harry excused himself and went back to his own rooms. The book could be a great help, but he was intent on his other plan as well. Tomorrow he would go to the library and look up exactly which spell might make it happen. And if he ran into Severus, he would just pretend as if nothing had happened, just like Severus said he wanted.

The next morning Harry asked Hermione for some Polyjuice potion for a lesson he was planning. Apparently she was already brewing a batch for Ron who used it for work and said she'd have some to him by Christmas. Harry left smiling from ear to ear. This would accelerate his plan by weeks.


	5. Chapter 5

Severus spent the remainder of term hiding in one place or another. He avoided most meals in the Great Hall and made as little use of the corridors as possible. He suspected almost certainly Potter was stubborn enough to corner him and press him to talk about it before he was ready. Oddly enough, the few times he did encounter him, Potter was distant. Distant enough that Severus found it easier to accept the likelihood that anything that happened 'that night' was, in both of their opinions, a mistake (albeit for different reasons).

The unease between himself and Potter had him seriously considering apologizing to Molly and explaining that he was needed at the castle, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. Molly seemed ecstatic about having another person for Christmas. Her excitement didn't seem at all diminished when he received an owl from her a few days prior insisting he arrive on Christmas Eve.

He did as requested (as he realized now he would always be doing for Molly). He apparated just outside of the Weasley's. Despite the cold, he was hesitant to knock on the door. Harry would be inside and he would have to deal with the awkward avoidance that he knew would ensue (he 'knew' because he would see to it.) A few moments of consideration had him believing the most sensible thing to do would be to go back to Hogwarts. Did anyone _really_ expect him to show up? No matter. He'd promised Molly. He knocked on the door and George answered.

"Sev...er...Profes...um, well you made it," he said with a ridiculous grin on his face. "Let me get your bag." He took his bag and Severus found himself being herded into a very warm, aromatic kitchen. "Mum, Sn-"

"Severus," he said, cutting off any repeat of their earlier exchange.

"Severus is here!" the young man shouted.

"I'll be down in a minute! I'm still getting his and Harry's room ready. Take him in the living room and let him sit down!" he heard Molly call from somewhere up above. George grinned at him and showed him to the living room.

Harry was already there, sitting with Ginerva, Lee and Hermione. Potter and Hermione were trying to teach Ginny and Lee a muggle card game. Ron sat in a corner beating Arthur at a game of chess. Arthur saw him come in and waved him over.

"Severus, glad you could make it," he said shaking his hand. He looked down at the board and up at Severus. "Mind taking over?"

"Not at all." He took the seat Arthur had just vacated and tried to see what he could make of the dismal mess in front of him. Either Ron was very good at this or there was a reason Arthur hadn't gone farther in the ministry. "Who's move is it?"

"That would be yours, sir." Ron replied nervously.

"For the last time Ronald, call me Severus." he said looking down at the board. He prodded one of his knights into action. "Your move."

Ron looked down at the board in surprise. He clearly hadn't expected for him to sacrifice his rook so readily. Then things got interesting. The remainder of the game lasted a good twenty minutes and ended in a draw. Severus was impressed; the youngest Weasley had never struck him as being that intelligent.

Perhaps he had a new chess partner on his hands. Molly bustled in just as the game was concluding. He stood up to greet her and was pulled into another rib crushing hug. This time, however, he did make an effort to almost hug her back. It was still something that was alien to him and he wasn't sure he would ever get used to such frequent displays of affection.

"I've got your room all ready. You'll be bunking with Harry in Charlie's old room. He wasn't able to come in from Romania this year. Harry dear, why don't you show Severus where you'll be staying?"

"Yes ma'am," Harry said as he jumped up to do her bidding. "If you'll follow me Severus." Harry grabbed his bag and lead him up several flights of staircases to a room shoved in an odd corner of the house. Harry opened the door and tossed the bag down on the bed.

Severus surveyed the room, intentionally avoiding Potter's gaze. "You'll take the bed," he told Harry as he went to look out the window. "I'm content to sleep on the floor." It was pitch dark out and there was really nothing to be seen outside if it was the middle of the day. He hoped Harry would just leave him alone so he could take a few moments to reorient.

"Suit yourself," he said and then left.

It would be ridiculous, he realized, to ask to stay in another room, but part of him really did not want to spend the night in the same room as Potter (even if it was a Trundle bed). It'd drive him mad, he was sure of it. Fortunately, he always brought along a sleeping potion to avoid embarrassing nightmares. He would take that directly before bed.

He only spent about ten minutes in the room and then went back downstairs. He stood at the bottom, awkwardly scanning the room for someone to pass the time with. There was no shortage of options. Determining who he might be able to ease into conversation with would prove tricky, however. Certainly any of them would talk to him, he just wasn't looking forward to uncomfortable interactions. Perhaps Hermione would rescue him.

Instead it was George who came over and took by the arm leading him to the kitchen table.

"It helps to get a seat early. That way you're by your favorite dishes," he said as he rearranged the plates around the chair he'd picked out for himself.

"Grab the ham while you're at it." Severus smirked as he stood behind the chair next to George's. It wasn't long before he heard Molly herding everyone into the kitchen. George pulled him into his chair.

"You'll lose it otherwise," he said. Severus wasn't sure how serious he was being, but there were an awful lot of people in the kitchen. In addition to the Weasleys and their spouses, himself, Harry, and the Lovegoods, were there. He was a little surprised they all fit. After everyone had found a chair, they all dug in. It was an odd feeling for Severus to be included. He was brought out of his reverie when George pointed out that Molly was about to say something about the lack of food on his plate, so he also began helping himself to the banquet before him.

He had to admit Molly's cooking was excellent and he'd ended up having several helpings, (not that anyone escaped Molly's table with only one helping). Everyone lingered over their deserts and coffee, the conversation becoming general until the guests who weren't staying the night left, and the others began wandering off to bed. He was just about to grab his book when he felt someone's hand on his shoulder. He looked over to see Ginerva standing by his chair.

"What can I do for you Ginerva?"

"I was wondering if I could speak to you in private," she said, then leaned closer and whispered, "I need a certain kind of potion."

Severus could very well imagine what sort of potion that would be. She came from a rather fecund lot. He stood up offering his arm. "Yes, of course." He allowed Ginerva to lead him up the stairs to her room. He preceded her in and was surprised when he heard her lock it. Surely she didn't expect Molly to be upset about it. When she turned to face him he had a sinking feeling that he had been had by the youngest Weasley.

"What happened?"

This girl was far cleverer than he might ever have given her credit for. Where she'd gotten it from he couldn't imagine. "When?" he asked.

"What happened between you and Harry, and don't try and lie to me, I grew up with the twins." She said stubbornly.

He raised an eyebrow, impressed. "Has Potter told you anything?"

Ginerva snorted, "Harry doesn't exactly talk to me about these things. Besides, he never listens to my advice anyway. Come on Severus, give me the dirt."

"If he hasn't told you," he began, afraid his very valid point wasn't going to go over well at all, "then I'm not comfortable telling you."

"I want what's best for Harry, and as you're what's best for Harry - even if he's too much of an imbecile to realize it yet - it is my duty to pass along to you the wisdom I accrued while dating him. I have information you can't get anywhere else."

Severus sighed. "Ginerva, nothing happened. Really. And has it not occurred to you that I'd be at least as uncomfortable talking to you about those things as Harry?"

"Who else do you have to talk about them? You're obviously not talking to Harry about them, and to the best of my knowledge nobody else knows, correct?" she asked, clearly waiting for a response.

She was really missing the point, but she was making some good points of her own. Why should he trust her, though? Their friendship was very new and, having never talked with anyone about the things she was interested in, he wasn't sure he could even really talk to her. Even if he could, he wasn't sure he'd ever be able to face her again.

"You can obliviate me afterward, if you'd like," she said breaking into his thoughts. He hadn't realized he'd let his guard down enough to be read. He didn't realize Ginny was any good at Legilimency. She was starting to look impatient.

He nodded. The terms were very agreeable and easy to accept; he couldn't imagine she was the sort of girl to go back on her word. He cleared his throat and began. "After your wedding, we got back to the castle and then to my chambers for a drink. He was already tipsy when we left. I can't say to what extent the drink he had with me further effected him, but he was without inhibition long enough to kiss me."

"Harry is never that much without inhibition. I once saw him . . . well I'll let you ask him why he doesn't drink vodka anymore, regardless." She paused here a little embarrassed at almost revealing one of Potter's secrets. "We were no longer together anymore and he could have had his pick of literally anyone in the bar. He ignored them all. If he kissed you, it's because he wanted to," she finished looking quite sure of herself.

He nodded. "I believe he wanted to. What concerned me was that it was drunkenly provoked. He's a friend and I've learned I need that. I wouldn't jeopardize it by following along as he got carried away because he was . . . randy on a Saturday night, frankly. I could've been anybody. He never sees anyone. I'm sure you know that."

Ginerva sat down on the bed. He joined her only after she grabbed his hand and yanked hard. The girl was stronger than she looked. "I do know that and I also know why. Did it never occur to you that he just needed the drink to get the courage up? Harry isn't always the brightest wizard when it comes to these things."

"I'm not bright about it, either, Ginerva," he explained. "But I don't need alcohol to know what I want. And I certainly know better than to assume it's an effective means to bed someone you intend to take seriously."

"So you're saying if he had kissed you stone cold sober you would have just gone along with it?" she asked doubtfully. "Something tells me we'd still be up here having this same conversation. I swear men make all of this far more complicated than it should ever be."

"We certainly _donot_," he defended on behalf of himself. "The fact of the matter is, if he kissed me sober it would've been different. We wouldn't be up here talking because there would likely be nothing to talk about. I'd have sent him on his way, I could have been firm with him because I'd have known he was in his right mind. Having been drinking, I had to give him the benefit of the doubt." Severus stood again and crossed to a chair on the other side of the room. "This isn't simple. Not for me."

He sat staring at the foot of Ginny's bed where an old trunk sat, covered with various stickers of Scarlet and Gold. The whole room looked as though Godric Gryffindor had thrown up on it. It wasn't unlike Harry's chambers at the castle, he realized. Somehow, that made it a little easier to tolerate.

Severus sighed. "I shouldn't be involved with someone whom I employ."

"You're just as bad as he is," she said, clearly disgruntled. "First off, you _are_ complicating this. Second, you can't claim alcohol as an excuse and then say his sobriety wouldn't have made a difference. Third, it _is_simple. You want him, he wants you. There's no reason the two of you can't be having lots and lots of sex right now. Fourth, there is no rule stating that a Headmaster cannot date a teacher. You're just being stubborn and self deprecating," she said irritably, throwing her hands up in the air. "I don't know why I bother. _Clearly_ you're intent on being miserable."

He sat quietly, observing her in the wake of her little outburst. Silence reigned for a long time while he went back to looking around her room. _"Impassionedoutbursts, rashdecisionsandscarlet. Somuchbloodyscarlet,"_ he thought as he considered Gryffindors and his ever-developing appreciation for them, always with the undercurrent of slight annoyance. _These_ would end up being his friends. He was surprised and pleased to acknowledge it. _"."_

"I'm not intent on being miserable," he finally said.

"Prove it," she said, staring him straight in the eyes. "You said you know what you want. If that's true and you really want to be happy, you should find a way to get it. Otherwise I'm going to have to assume that you really _do_ enjoy wallowing in your own misery."

That would've been a fair assumption. Truthfully, he believed he would miss his misery just a _little_ if he were happier. But the time he'd been spending with Potter before the wedding had him happier than he'd ever been (as far as he could recall) and he hadn't missed a moment of his misery.

"You said you have information I can't get anywhere else," he reminded her. "Let's hear about that."

"OK," she said leaning back as if he were one of her girlfriends. He half expected her to start doing something with hair; _"That'"_, he thought to himself.

He listened to her talk about Potter for almost half an hour. Much of what was revealed had always been obvious to Severus, but there were bits of information here and there which would come in handy. Why Potter preferred the left side of the bed, for example, though it didn't matter, because Severus preferred the right. None of the handy bits were relevant to winning Potter over, but nothing Ginerva said led him to believe there was anything to worry about in that department (to the contrary, she kept insisting Severus had already won.)

"Why, exactly, didn't it work between the two of you?" he asked, apropos of nothing.

"It was different after the war. We were different. Somethings just aren't meant to be," she said matter of factly. "Speaking of things that aren't meant to be, I really would appreciate it if you could arrange that potion for me. Lee and I aren't in any hurry."

"It's nearly ready," he informed her. "I will pay you a visit in January with a draught. I'd brew more, but it loses potency if it's left to sit for more than a few days. So we'll have to meet once a month." He stood, ready to approach the door. "You're making a very responsible decision, by the way. The last thing the world needs right now are Weasley/Jordan hybrids running about," he joked.

"Tell me about it," she said rolling her eyes. "Especially given my family's penchant for twins. Merlin help us all." She laughed and Severus had to fight the urge to laugh with her, though he did grant her a smirk.

"Well it's late," he said rising to leave. "I should be getting to bed."

"Aren't you forgetting something?" she said standing as she did.

He turned back to look at her, "I've decided not to Obliviate you, you may prove useful in the future and I am disinclined to repeating myself."

"Very well," she said walking him to the door. She opened it and Severus had just stepped into the hall when she grabbed his arm and pulled him back into the room. Being constantly man handled was going to take some getting used to. "I almost forgot. Harry is an absolute sucker for having his hair played with. Do that and he'll do anything you want." Severus didn't like the look in her eyes when she said this, but it was possibly the most valuable piece of information she'd given him. He had a lot to think about it.

After that last admission Severus left. He ran into Lee in the stairwell who threw him a commiserating look before heading to the room he had just vacated. Once more the man found himself on the verge of laughter. All of this was so foreign to him, yet comforting at the same time. He knew that not everyone here actually _liked_ him, but they all seemed to care about him, somehow felt that he should be under their protection. It was a new and strange feeling for him, but he rather thought he could get used to it.

He slipped quietly into the room he was sharing with Potter, so as not to disturb him or encourage conversation. He needn't have bothered. Potter, sleeping on a trundle bed, was dead to the world. There was a vial of Severus's potion sitting on the nightstand. He was glad the brat had finally seen the sense in getting a good night's sleep.

Severus stood there staring at him for quite awhile. Potter would never be handsome, not in the traditional sense, but he was obnoxiously adorable and could be charming when he made the effort. And then there were those eyes. They were not Lily's eyes. They were Harry's and contained depths that Lily's never had, nor could have, a fact of which Severus was very much aware. No, Harry was neither of his parents. In truth, he was the best of both of them, and so much more. Harry was his own person and had easily outstripped his parents in every regard.

Severus pulled himself from his reverie as Harry shifted a bit. He stiffened, wondering what his fate might be if he were caught, but Harry did not wake. If anything, he looked even more comfortable than before. He was laying on his back now, his face to the ceiling. He almost looked at peace. Severus just stared and before he could restrain himself he reached down with one hand and ran it through Harry's hair. The young man leaned into the touch, but did not seem to wake. He caught himself before he could get carried away and got into bed as quickly as he could manage.

Severus woke up the next morning to a most unusual sensation. There was something on his feet. He sat up quickly knocking something off the bed, right into Harry's face.

"Ow," the young man cried, sitting up and rubbing his head. "Happy Christmas, Severus," he said tossing a present at him. Severus then realized what had been on his feet. Christmas presents. He'd never really gotten any before. He and Dumbledore occasionally exchanged the odd gift or two, - Minerva on occasion, as well - and, of course, Potter had insisted the past few years, but nothing such as this. He looked over at Potter who was already unwrapping his pile. "Go on. We'll be expected at breakfast soon." So Severus slowly reached out for the present he'd initially kicked off the bed.

It was from George. Severus had a sinking suspicion he knew what it was and unwrapped it very slowly. It was not his medal, as he had feared, but a framed copy of the acceptance speech. Severus could not refrain from chuckling a bit before moving on. There was a book from Hermione (Ron had also signed the card though Severus doubted he had much to do with it), another book from Ginerva, a bottle of elf made wine from Bill and Fleur and Arthur had bought him a new journal. He thought that was it when he noticed one last lumpy parcel tangled up in the covers. He opened it to discover a hand made jumper in Slytherin green.

"I got blue this year," Harry said pulling his jumper on over his pajamas. "Go on, it's tradition to at least wear it to breakfast. Molly will be terribly disappointed if you don't." With that Harry was out the door, not even bothering to change into proper clothing before heading downstairs. Severus was at least going to put on a pair of trousers. Even so, he wasn't more than five minutes behind Harry, which was just long enough to be the last one down to breakfast. Only Molly and Arthur had bothered to change out of their night things. Everyone else had simply thrown on their jumpers and headed to the table.

His delay had cost him his choice of seats and the only one left available was the one between Potter and Ginerva. He knew there was no way to get around it, so he took his seat with as much grace as possible. Molly put a plate in front of him that no one could ever hope to finish.

"You're too thin Severus," she said. Harry began to snigger until Molly put an equally large plate in front of him. "You're no better young man. It doesn't matter how much food the house elves make if you can't be bothered to show up to meals." Harry threw a murderous glance at Hermione who was busy picking lint off her sweater. "Eat." she commanded. Severus happily tucked in, enjoying being mothered for the first time in his life. Potter started eating slowly, while simultaneously trying to pull his wand out of his pocket without anybody noticing.

"I know what you're doing Potter," he said softly, feeling his hand still between them. "Wait until later. She'll be expecting it now." Potter nodded his head infinitesimally and brought his hand out from under the table. Severus went back to his own breakfast, he was about to interject in a debate Ron and George were having about Quidditch when Hermione leaned over the table and said quietly; "Thank you for the book Severus. It's one I've been dying to get my hands on for a long time."

Severus froze. He had no idea what to make of that statement. He hadn't brought any gifts and he hadn't thought to receive any. Quite frankly, he hadn't thought about gifts at all. It was a custom he wasn't well acquainted with. Why would she mention a gift she hadn't received? Was she chastising him for not thinking about it? Before he could even begin to fathom a reply Potter responded for him.

"Hermione, I told you. Severus doesn't want you making a big deal about this," he said, as if he knew exactly what she was talking about.

She blushed and looked down before saying, "I know and I'm sorry Severus, it just really meant a lot to me and I wanted you to know."

"Well, now he knows," Harry replied. "Will you pass the bacon Hermione?"

She turned to locate the bacon.

Potter leaned into him and whispered in his ear, "Tell her she's welcome and I'll explain everything later." Hermione turned back to them handing Harry the plate of bacon.

Severus cleared his throat. "Ahem, you're quite welcome, Hermione. I know how much you like to learn." Hermione blushed again and Severus returned to his breakfast, hoping to avoid any similar conversations with the others. As soon as he was politely able, he went to his room and waited for Potter.

Harry took his time over breakfast, in part because he was enjoying himself and partly because he knew Severus was waiting. He wanted to torture him just a little bit and in all honesty, he wasn't sure how the other man would react when he explained what he'd done. Finally he couldn't put it off any longer and went upstairs to get dressed.

At first he thought the room was empty until the door closed behind him and locked. Not that it would have helped if it had been unlocked; Severus was standing in front of it. He crossed his arms and glared at him. Harry did his best to keep his face impassive and stared right back. Harry counted it as a small victory when Severus broke the silence.

"Would you care to explain to me Potter what Professor Weasley was talking about at the breakfast table?" he drawled, sounding almost as frightening as he had on Harry's first day of school.

"Only if you agree to hear me out before responding," Harry replied, sounding a lot calmer than he actually felt.

"Hear you out," the man sneered back. "Just what on earth have you done?"

Harry sat down at the foot of Charlie's old bed. "Now that tone of voice isn't going to get you anywhere, Severus."

Severus looked like he might actually explode. "Potter!"

"Severus?" he said cheekily.

Severus stalked towards him stopping only inches away. "Tell me what I want to know."

"I will, as soon as you sit down and promise to listen to all I have to say before responding," Harry said bravely. He'd played by Severus's rules for a month. Now Severus could play by his, if only for one day. They stayed like that for several moments before Severus sighed and sat down on the trundle bed. Harry knew better than to accept that as an agreement to his other stipulation. "I want your word Severus, you will let me finish before you respond."

Severus glared out and crossed his arms again. "Fine, Potter, you have my word that I will let you finish."

"Very well then," he said pushing his glasses up. "I bought some presents for people and said they were from you." Severus opened his mouth. Harry put his hand up. "You gave me your word." Severus closed his mouth and contented himself with a murderous stare. "I knew that people would want to get something for you and they did. I also knew that this wasn't something you would be...used to and that it wouldn't occur to you to expect it. I also knew that you would feel embarrassed when you realized that it hadn't occurred to you to get anything for anyone else. So in the hopes of sparing you this discomfort, or the anxiety you would have put yourself through had I mentioned it to you earlier, I simply took the initiative and took care of it for you. I put a great deal of thought into this before I did it, but I really thought it would make today easier for you. I know that this," he gestured to encompass everything, "can take awhile to get used to."

He'd watched Severus's face the entire time and knew that he had won the argument. Severus was no longer adept at hiding his feelings in front of Harry. He cleared his throat and nodded. "That's true enough." Finally, he moved to the bed and sat at the edge. "I should probably know what was purchased at some point. I don't suppose you made a list? And I'll need to reimburse you."

"There's really no need for that," he said taking Severus's hand in his own. "That was my Christmas present to you. Besides, what are...friends...for?" Being this close to him, on a bed no less, it was all Harry could do not to give in to every sexual impulse he was fighting, the least of which was the urge to kiss Severus until the man accepted that they ought to be together. Ron, however, had given him some sensible advice and he intended to follow it. He settled for the fact that Severus had not removed his hand from his own.

Severus was staring at their hands resting together on the bed. "I'm not a hundred percent sure yet," he half-joked. He took his hand away from Harry and clasped his own together, allowing them to rest in his lap. "Thank you for helping me."

Harry sighed and stood up. Without conscious thought either way, he began to change.

"Perhaps I should leave," Severus said moving to the door.

"Suit yourself," Harry said to him as the man paused in the doorway. He didn't meet his eye and soon he was gone. _"Thatwentratherwell,"_ Harry thought to himself. Hermione had made good on her promise and included a vial of Polyjuice Potion with his present. Tomorrow he would find out, for better or worse, what Severus's deepest, most desperate desires were. From there he could plan what he was going to do.

The next night Harry retired to his chambers early. Severus was avoiding him again and he didn't want to get caught up with Ron and Hermione in case it distracted him from his evening's goal. He waited until after curfew. There weren't many students still in the castle, but he didn't want to take any chances. Then after checking the Marauder's Map he left.

It took him less than five minutes to reach the room. He looked around to make sure no one saw him and then slipped in, locking the door behind him. He approached the mirror from behind. He pulled the potion out and stared at it for a moment before uncorking it and adding Severus's hair. The potion was pleasant, turning a very deep shade of green and smelling vaguely of sandalwood. It tasted bitter, though, like a strong cup of coffee. Still, it was worlds better than Goyle.

Transfiguing into someone as tall as Severus was always fascinating. Things looked different from so much higher in the air. Having previous experience morphing into some one taller than him, he hadn't worn anything under his robes. Even so, he was still terribly uncomfortable wearing his own.

On the one hand, he didn't want to be uncomfortable, on the other Severus was a very private man. Of course he was pretty sure that he would, in the near future, have plenty of opportunities to see Severus naked, preferably in bed. _But_, said a doubtful voice, _youmaynot. Nowmightbetheonlytimeyou'llhavethisopportunity._ With that thought he slowly unbuttoned his too short robes and shrugged them off his shoulders.

He glanced down at his body. Severus was covered in scars. Harry ran his fingers over them, wondering if Severus remembered where each and every one of them came from, just as Harry remembered his own. Goosebumps sprung up in response to wandering fingers. He stifled a moan as they slid over his ass. _"You'regettingdistracted."_

Reluctantly he stopped touching and bent down to pull his wand out of his robes. He then cast the most complicated and powerful Confundus Charm he had found on the mirror, praying all the while that it would actually work.

Irrationally paranoid, he glanced around the room several times before he walked around to the other side of the mirror and stopped in front of it, eyes closed. His heart raced while his mind tried to process the facts. He was about to truly know Severus's feelings. He would have the most intimate understanding he'd ever had of anyone.

Grinning, he opened his eyes and met Severus's. The smile before him was the biggest he'd ever seen on Severus's face and this provoked an even bigger grin. He began laughing, closed his eyes and covered his mouth. Once he collected himself, he opened his eyes and adjusted slowly to the sight before him.

He watched a series of events unfold, all involving himself and Severus. They took their meals side-by-side in the Great Hall or at a small table in Severus's chambers. They took walks around the grounds, alone, at all hours. Severus preferred night to day for walking, it seemed. There was a lot of time spent, just the two of them, doing little more than reading. Sometimes they read to each other.

They were in Severus's chambers, on the couch, Harry laying with his head in Severus's lap. Severus read aloud as he twisted his fingers around Harry's hair and scratched his head.

The goosebumps sprung up again. Harry had never realized that such an innocuous idea could be so erotic. His own reflected fantasies were shallow and childish compared to the ones he was viewing now.

Severus put the book down and let his hands roam over Harry. They appeared to be light, occasionally non-existent, caresses, the kind meant to tease and entice. Such a simple pleasure, yet it was arousing as well. Harry could not fight his growing erection.

Then the scene shifted again. They were in Severus's private study, a room he had only been granted access to once. Severus had Harry bent over his desk like a naughty school boy. Naughty, indeed.

This was a whole other side of Severus's desire. It was rough and demanding. How Harry hadn't made it to those fantasies himself yet was a mystery, but he would certainly have them now.

He looked down at Severus's cock and stopped his hand just shy of grabbing it. _"Howfaristoofar?"_ he thought to himself._ "Doesit__**really**__matteratthispoint?"_ Harry was finding it impossible to focus on anything other than the obvious. And though they never followed through to any completion, the scenes in the mirror kept shifting, becoming increasingly intense. It seemed that Severus was just as ruthless in the bedroom as he was everywhere else.

He didn't want to wait for Severus to give him the opportunity he had before him; free and unfettered access to his body. Once that thought entered his mind there was no room for any other. He gave over to his desire and let his hands roam over Severus's pale form. The realization that he would feel every touch that he wanted to give to Severus was almost enough to send him over the edge, but he was determined to use his time wisely and gave over to exploring Severus's body inch by sensuous inch.

Severus watched in horror as Harry pleasured himself to Severus's fantasies, a horror compounded by the fact that Harry was now an exact replica of himself. It was unnerving. It was also disturbingly erotic. Severus was torn between his anger at such an obscene intrusion upon his privacy and the lust that was threatening to overpower his common sense. Had Harry looked like Harry, Severus would not have been able to restrain himself; as it was, he was able to hold himself in check. But only _just_.

Severus had gone down to Potter's chambers to talk to him. He was halfway there when he saw Harry sneaking through the halls. He had cast a Disillusionment Charm on himself and followed the young man. He knew where they were heading as soon as Potter turned down the corridor. Severus had sometimes wondered how long it would take him to find it. Harry had looked around before letting himself in and locking the door behind him.

Severus was not concerned; there were a few doors even 'The Marauders' had never known about. He walked around the corner and let himself in through the hidden entrance, just as the brat downed a vial of Polyjuice Potion and, after not nearly enough hesitation, disrobed. This left Severus confronted by the sight of his own ass, which Harry took no time in fondling. Disturbing, but hardly worrisome. The Mirror of Erised was too powerful a magic artifact to be fooled by Polyjuice potion. Then the arrogant, invasive, insolent boy cast a spectacularly powerful Confundus Charm on the damned thing. If he hadn't been so shocked and furious, he would have been impressed.

Severus found himself standing against the door feeling completely powerless as Harry made free with what was essentially _his_ body. He wanted to strangle him, slowly, Azkhaban be damned. He wanted to take the boy and show him exactly what it meant to be punished by Severus Snape. He wanted to bloody get off so desperately (he hadn't been so hard in ages!) it was worse than being a teenager. But he couldn't do any of these things, - not yet at least - so he just stood there, silently waiting for Potter to finish so that he might escape.

The young man took his time and didn't stop until he began morphing back into himself. He sighed and got dressed slowly before stumbling through the door with the most idiotic grin on his face. Severus lifted the Dissillusionment Charm and fell to his knees. He was in physical pain from the strength of the emotions rolling over him. "How DARE he?" Severus actually said out loud. The young man had just casually stolen from Severus the one weapon he'd promised himself no one would ever have again. Harry now had the power to damn near destroy him. How could he combat such knowledge?

Well there was _one_ problem he had the power to eliminate and, unseemly as it was, he eliminated it right there.

Severus had completely given himself over to his anger by the time he reached his office. He'd rather be in his quarters, but Potter would be able to get in if he really wanted, and Severus didn't think being in the same building with him, let alone the same room, was a good idea. His office, however, could be completely barred against intrusion. He glanced at the portraits. "If you value your frames, I suggest you leave. NOW." They were no fools and hurried as quickly as they could to canvases unknown. All save one. Dumbledore watched, amused, as Severus stalked around his office slamming things around He poured himself a drink. Severus looked up only after he had drained the glass. He wasted no time in pouring himself another. "Bugger off you old queer," Severus sneered at the old Headmaster.

"What would be the fun in that? Especially as I'm not particularly attached to this frame." Dumbledore replied merrily. Severus made an obscene hand gesture as he drained his glass again. Albus chuckled a bit. "That's highly unlikely Severus."

Severus scowled at him, pouring himself another drink. He sat down in Harry's chair, as he had come to think of it, and looked up at the old man intently. He didn't exactly trust the old man, but they had almost been friends once. Besides, if he insisted on staying, he might as well make himself useful.

"I'm going to kill him," Severus finally said. He didn't doubt that Dumbledore would know who he was talking about.

"That would be a shame after all our efforts to keep him alive for so long."

"You'd want him dead if it were you," he insisted. "I hope," he added, not wanting to think about the old man's proclivities. "He's really done it this time. I knew he was an arrogant, conceited, impulsive, thoughtless, disrespectful, indiscreet, idiotic, reckless, childish, foolish, perverted brat, but I _never_thought he could do something so, so... I don't even know how to describe the invasion of privacy he has just visited on my person!" He drained his glass once more. "I'm going to kill him. Trust me, it will be more merciful than he actually deserves."

Though far from convinced Potter deserved to die, Dumbledore appeared to understand the degree to which Severus was infuriated and to respect that it was clearly a serious matter. "Do you care to discuss what's happened?"

"I want to forget what happened," he said wearily. Albus didn't respond, but simply sat there and watched. Severus knew he was waiting to see what else he would reveal if left to his own devices. And Firewhiskey. He would never tell anyone - much less Dumbledore - what he had witnessed. It was too humiliating. The whole bloody fiasco that was his supposed relationship with Potter was just too damn humiliating. All the same, he couldn't keep himself from saying, "He betrayed my trust, Headmaster."

Dumbledore would know what that would mean to him and would gage the level of betrayal by Severus's response. "I know this isn't what you want to hear, but I think killing the boy would be counterproductive to your aims, Severus."

"What would you know of my aims? It could be argued that you're the reason I'm in this mess, sending that bloody chicken after me, when you knew damn well that I was prepared to die." He poured himself another drink simply to have something to do.

"I didn't send Fawkes to anyone. You called him there because deep down you knew you deserved a better life than the one you lived." Albus responded calmly.

"I'm still going to kill him," Severus insisted insolently.

"How very Gryffindor of you." Severus scowled, his fingers itching to grab his wand and hex the portrait. "Well, I believe I am in the unique position to alleviate you of some of your burdens."

"Indeed?"

"Why don't you try talking to Harry about it?"

"Harry doesn't know that I know about his escapade. He was unaware of my presence," Severus trailed off. That made him pause. "Even if he did know, this is not something one can simply drop by and chat about," he said defensively pushing his doubts aside. The man in the portrait eyed him shrewdly.

"What you need to do is get away and think."

Thinking was the last thing Severus felt he should be doing, especially if those thoughts involved Potter. "And just how are you going to help me achieve what you're suggesting? As the Headmaster I can't just up and leave any time it strikes my fancy."

"As a matter of fact, you can. If I'm not mistaken you still have about twenty five years worth of holiday and sick time accrued. You've never in your entire tenure taken time off for yourself. Perhaps now might be a good time to experiment with that." He always did have a way of looking at things. "And I can help you by advising Harry if he needs it, which I doubt, should something come up."

"I **donot** want Potter in my office."

"There is no reason he has to come here. I am more than capable of walking to his."

"Where would I go?"

"Wherever you want."

Severus returned to his quarters via secret passage. He made his way to his bedroom, casting every anti-intruder and privacy spell he knew. He was in no shape to meet anyone, let alone the one person who had the balls to barge in anyway. He locked his door and for good measure levitated his wardrobe so that it was blocking the door as well. He knew he was over reacting, but he didn't care; as long as he could simulate privacy, he was content.

He sat down the bed and thought over Dumbledore's advice. He'd always thought the notion of taking time off to be self indulgent. If you were going to face your problems why not do so immediately? Why go away first? The best time to collect intelligence was in the immediate wake of an event. People were more likely to slip up then.

But of course Potter had no idea that Severus had seen him. As such, who knew what Potter's reaction would be? Who knew what sort of liberties he might now feel entitled to make? Or worse, what if he decided he didn't want Severus anymore? Having managed to avoid the blasted mirror ever since it took up residence in the castle, he couldn't be entirely sure what Potter had seen. He'd never been an easy man and he was not an easy lover. What if it were more than Potter was willing, or wanting, to take on?

The more he thought about it, the more he saw the wisdom in the old man's logic. He couldn't predict his own response because he had no idea how Potter would respond and the brat had an annoying habit of throwing Severus off his guard. For the first time in his life, Severus realized that the one person who was most likely slip up and reveal too much was him. If he stayed, he would only succeed in handing Potter more ammunition. No, he would leave and he would leave tonight. Now all he had to do was decide where he was going.


	6. Chapter 6

Harry awoke the next morning with a sense of pride that didn't shame him nearly much as it should have. He'd acted as a Peeping Tom. He'd interfered in Severus's business by what was perhaps one of the most odious methods imaginable. He knew he should apologize but there was no way he was having that conversation. "I nicked your hair so I could Transfigure into you." That alone would probably leave him running to the Ministry for work. He didn't want to know what adding the part about The Mirror and its little surprise would result in.

Severus would get no apologies.

He would, however, be sought after for the better part of the day. Naturally, he was nowhere to be found and this didn't surprise Harry at all. Severus went well out of his way to avoid Harry before Christmas. He'd had no reason to think things would change upon his return but he certainly hadn't thought Severus would disappear from the face of the Earth. After searching high and low (even visiting the places he and Severus walked in the mirror) he'd begun to suspect Severus was hiding in plain sight.

As he knocked on Severus's Chamber door, Albus said his name.

"Albus!" Harry replied, startled. "I had no idea you were there."

"He isn't here, Harry."

"How can he not be here? I've looked everywhere else!"

"He's no longer in the Castle," Albus explained. No longer in the Castle?

"So he's in Hogsmeade?" Harry asked.

"Probably not."

"Well, where's he gone, then?" Harry was becoming more irritated with the vagueness of the conversation by the second. It was annoying enough that Snape was avoiding him; he didn't need Albus's ambiguous answers.

"Regretfully, he left no forwarding address," Albus replied. He actually _sounded_ regretful, and Harry could imagine why. Severus wasn't the type to leave the _Dungeons _much, let alone leave Hogwarts for any significant length of time.

"Did you see him leave?"

"No, but we did speak last night. He was upset."

"Upset?" More bloody vagueries.

"Yes. At you, unfortunately."

"_At me?_" Harry was confused. They hadn't seen each other the day before and things were civil at Christmas. When could he possibly have pissed off Severus?

"Yes. He came into the office and told me he was going to kill you, as a matter of fact. Reminded me of the old times," said the old man with a touch of nostalgia. "You'll be happy to know, I advised him against that," he added.

"Did he say why he was going to kill me?"

"He said you'd violated his privacy. In a rather spectacular fashion if his reaction was anything to go by."

"_Impossible," _Harry thought. "_He can't know . . .."_

"I must admit, I'm a bit curious. But from the sound of it I don't want to know."

His heart was pounding against his chest. He was even shaking. How could Severus have been there? No one saw him go into the room. He made sure no one was lurking about before he removed his clothes. _Could he have been there? _Impossible.

Only it was possible. Severus's knowledge of the castle rivaled his own, and there was no way to be certain that he had not been in the room with him. Of course if he had, Harry now would have to talk to him about it after all. That was not a conversation to which he looked forward.

"You deduced wisely, Albus. You do not want to kno,." Harry said, his heart sinking. This is not something Severus would easily, if ever, forgive. "Do you know when he'll be back?"

"I regret again, that I do not know."

Harry frowned. All the work he'd done to smooth over the years of mutual spite was undone. Severus would hate him the way he did when he thought Harry was an arrogant bully just like his father. Unfortunately, the evidence was beginning to suggest he _was_ like his father. Only worse. Much, much worse.

He had to fix things with Severus and he had to fix them _fast_, but how does someone apologize for something like that? And to _Severus Snape_? It was times like these his Slytherin side emerged; there was not enough bravery in the world to convince the Gryffindor to face the situation. No, the Slytherin self-preservation was standing front and center begging Harry to visit the Ministry the next morning and get the hell out of Hogwarts.

But he didn't want to leave. He _wouldn't_ leave. Hogwarts was his home and he was happy there. This, of course, meant he'd have to do absolutely whatever it would take to win Severus's trust back. Reluctantly, he accepted that there was probably only one person he could bear to ask to help him out of the mess.

"Thank you, Albus," Harry said. "I'll be on my way, then."

Harry didn't wait for a reply before turning on his heel and heading to his chambers. He got there in record time. Without any thought at all, he grabbed some Floo powder and threw it in the fireplace.

"The Burrow!" he said before stepping into the flames.

Harry felt that all of the fates were against him once he'd realized he'd arrived just before dinner and would be forced to endure at least an hour of family time before he'd be able to get the advice he needed. Luckily after years by Snape's side he'd learned how to hide his emotions. The only one who might be able to discern his emotional state was the person he needed to talk to, which would work in his favor as she'd be impatient to find out what was wrong.

Quidditch dominated dinner conversation which made everything seem to go by quicker. As the last of the family finished up their dinner, Harry asked Ginny if she'd be willing to talk to him about something private.

"I was wondering why you hadn't asked yet. There's obviously something bothering you." She smiled. "I can't imagine _what_ it could be . . .." Harry followed her upstairs to her room. She shut the door. "What's going on?" she asked with extreme interest.

Harry looked down at the floor, uncertain of how he could explain to her what happened. Obviously he wouldn't give her details, but could he even bring himself to admit to anything he'd done? After an hour of steeling himself for her wrath, he felt only slightly prepared to endure it, but he'd have to. The best route was the direct one. "I'd tell you to sit down but I'd rather you fell over. I need the laugh. So here goes: I'm pretty sure I'm in love with Severus."

"Figured that one out ages ago," she smirked.

Half of him wanted to deny that she could possibly have known but he knew it was pointless to do. She knew. He could tell by looking at her. "What gave me away?" he inquired.

"Your happiness," she said simply, shrugging and sitting down on the bed. "So what have you done now?"

"It's a long story," he began. She shot him a look that let him know there was _absolutely no way_ she would be spending her night trying to drag more out of him. ". . . which I think I'll tell. We kissed after your wedding. It seemed to me like he might have enjoyed it. I wanted to know how he felt about me. So I found one of his hairs on my robes . . .and well, I may have gotten some Polyjuice potion from Hermione..."

"For the love of Merlin's saggy left nutsack," she said putting her face in her hands. "What else?" she asked resignedly.

"After I Transfigured into him, I went to the Mirror of Erised, charmed it, and . . . snooped."

She was on him before he realized, pummeling him with her fists. They were little, but she had six brothers and had obviously been taught how to throw a punch. As much as it hurt he was glad that she had forgotten she was a witch. It took him a bit, but he finally got her restrained.

"Have you finally gone insane or are you just that childish and stupid?" she spat out trying to free herself. Unfortunately that's when she remembered she was a witch and non-verbally summoned her wand and treated him to one hell of a stinging hex. She pulled free and turned to face him. She locked the door with a spell. He knew he had no hope of escaping as she pointed her wand directly at his chest. "You have ruined all of my efforts."

"Efforts?" Harry asked, confused. "What efforts?"

"My efforts to speed along this bumbling attempt at a courtship you're both failing at spectacularly. Those efforts. Sev and I had a really good talk on Christmas and now, because you can't be bothered to think through your actions, you have probably destroyed any chance that he would follow through. Do you have any idea how difficult this must be for him? The only people he's ever trusted either abandoned him or used him and left him to die," she said, stating the obvious. "I assume he knows?"

Harry nodded hesitantly. "Since when are you calling him 'Sev', anyway? And having talks? What's that all about?"

"I was in a unique position to help him, so I did. We've become friendly. Now stop trying to change the subject."

"I'm right on the bloody subject," Harry argued. "What did he say to you?"

"That's not my business to tell," she replied angrily.

Harry rolled his eyes. "Well can you at least tell me what it was about, can't you?"

"If you can't figure that out, then you shouldn't be allowed to teach."

He sighed. "He caught me at the mirror. He didn't confront me about it, but he knows. And I have no idea how to get him to forgive me for doing that." Harry sat down in the chair across the room and buried his face in his hands. "He's disappeared," he said, looking back up at Ginny. "He's just gone."

"It's probably better that he's gone now. He might actually kill you if he saw you right now," she said lowering her wand.

Harry nodded. "Yeah," he said, "I was afraid you'd say that."

"_Without_ giving me _any_ details, I need to know if you liked what you saw in the mirror." He looked at her inquiringly. "What I mean is, did you like what you saw? Is that something you want? Is it something you think you could commit to? Because Severus is not a casual guy Harry, and if you don't think you can then you should walk away now. I don't want to see you hurt. Or dead," she said seriously.

"What I saw was...perfect, honestly. I am more committed to it now than I was before." She eyed him doubtfully. "Severus is the person I want to spend the rest of my life with. I will do whatever it takes to make this right."

"Whatever it takes, hmmm?" she said looking at him thoughtfully.

"Whatever it takes," he stated confidently. He was not feeling nearly as confident when he left. Ginny's plan was perfect in it's simplicity and it's directness. He knew as soon as the words left her mouth that is was perfect. Perfectly obvious as well, but that didn't make it any easier, especially as it would involve him having to talk to Severus about it. If that's what it took, however, that's what he would do. Now the problem was figuring out how to do it.

Severus looked out over the lights of Paris from a lush hotel room. He had chosen France as it provided the only legitimate excuse he could conceive of for taking a holiday: a potions conference. He'd never attended one before and he was very glad of it.

Leaving Hogwarts wouldn't have been so bad if he weren't a war hero. Just as Harry complained, most single witches and wizards (a few married ones as well) felt the need to try to pick Severus up. It was becoming wearisome (not to mention tedious). Such attention would've been wildly flattering were it not for how repulsive and insidious they considered him for so many years. Then there was the hefty pension to consider, as well.

He remembered the first time someone approached him. It was his first foray out into the world since the war ended nine months before. Until that point he'd been able to avoid going anywhere. It was amazing what one could acquire through owl order service, but he'd eventually needed to visit the apothecary; some things simply cannot be obtain via owl. He'd braced himself and reluctantly made his way to Diagon Alley.

He wasn't sure what he'd expected, but it wasn't the stares of adulation, the whispers behind hands, or the compulsion some felt to walk up to him and shake his hand to profess their gratitude and respect. It had been rather unnerving. Even then he couldn't help but wonder if that's how Potter had felt during his years at Hogwarts.

It was at the apothecary that things had turned to the truly bizarre. After completing his transaction he was approached by a very pretty witch at least ten years his junior. She started off by asking him questions about potions. She wasn't unintelligent and Snape found talking to her came easily. After standing outside the shop for twenty minutes she invited him to lunch. He intended to decline, but was enjoying himself. Loathe as he was to admit it, he had missed simple interactions and conversation.

They spent nearly two hours in The Leaky Cauldron in pleasant conversation before things turned for the obnoxious. "I feel like I should confess that I knew who you were when I approached you at the Apothecary."

He'd thought it odd that she'd asked his name. "Why did you lie?" he asked.

"Would we call that a lie, per se?"

He nodded. "_We_ would, yes."

She smiled at him. He continued to stare at her and finally she dropped the act. "I lied because I didn't want it to be obvious that I was picking you up."

Again, he nodded, this time with significant discomfort. "That's . . . very flattering," he replied, confused but intrigued.

"Had that possibility really not occurred to you?" she asked, surprised.

How to respond was massively unclear. "Not exactly, no," he mustered.

"Well, now that you know my intentions, are you interested or no?"

He was interested. She was a pretty enough girl, a sharp witch (clearly very skilled in potions - or at least could remember enough to chat up a professional) and an adequate drinking companion. She was far from perfect, but still . . ..

"It really hadn't occurred to you that it was a possibility?"

Needless to say, it hadn't. Having been incredibly busy for the better part of 20 years, he hadn't encountered many opportunities to indulge in such activities. He hadn't encountered _any_, as a matter of fact. At least not to his knowledge; if he was learning anything from the woman, it was how oblivious he could be. "I'm a busy man. Always have been. I suppose I'm just terribly out of practice," he lied.

"You still haven't answered my question."

He smiled slightly, "No. It hadn't."

"I meant my other question," she said rolling her eyes.

He laughed, embarrassed and nervous. "I think so, yes," he replied. "I mean yes. I am."

"Good," she said smiling broadly and signaling for the check. "Exactly how long has it been?" she asked mischievously.

That was a difficult question to answer and not, unfortunately, because it'd been awhile. "Exactly?" he asked, wishing he had a different answer. "I've actually always been a very busy person."

She gave him a calculating look. "That's a real shame," she said. "Were you planning on being a busy person this weekend?"

"I _was_ planning on it."

"And now?" she asked suggestively, putting her hand over his once more.

He stared at her for several moments (long moments; they went on forever). She was sincere in her desire to be with him, her eyes evidenced that fact. He looked down at their hands clasped together. "Now I have new plans."

She smiled brightly at him. "I'm glad to hear it," she said honestly. The bill came, and after a brief scuffle Severus paid it (being tall had it's advantages) and they left. She took him back to her flat and that's where they stayed for the next three days. She was a patient woman who managed to make Severus feel completely comfortable, even naked which was a definite first, and at no time made him feel anything other than wanted (even given his initial performance). She gave him plenty of opportunities to make it up to her, which Severus was quite sure he did if the look on her face was anything to go on.

Snape spent the next six moths enjoying his own personal sexual revolution. He'd never before had such unfettered freedom and it was liberating. Not to mention he'd gone far too long in his own company not to make the best of what fate had handed him; large numbers of attractive witches and wizards queuing up to sleep with him, namely. He'd even shagged a vampire (not all it's cracked up to be). He was also intrigued on an intellectual level. Each experience was new and different. And the things people talked about afterwards was fascinating; you'd be surprised what complete strangers will let slip in the after glow of a good shag.

As fun as it had been, it had lost its luster rather quickly. It was empty and hollow and he did have standards after all. He considered looking for something more substantial, but it didn't take many "dates" to decide that it was going to be much more trouble than it was worth. A few months later he'd returned to Hogwarts.

He hadn't been laid since. Perhaps the holiday was reason enough to go out. He was in a city filled with strangers, after all. Why not take advantage of the situation? He could get it all out of his system, relieve the tension, and move forward. He might return to Hogwarts with a clear enough mind to disregard whatever feelings he had for Harry. Maybe they weren't feelings of love, anyway. It was possible - entirely possible - he'd confused feelings of lust and love. Maybe Harry was simply _near_ him. Maybe he was merely close in proximity and easily obtainable? Wouldn't, then, making a casual pickup serve as an adequate prescription?

That's what he thought, anyway. Unfortunately it hadn't worked out that way. He'd gone to one of the scheduled "mixers" determined to bed someone that night. Potter or no, it had been a little long for his tastes.

The mixer was being held in the lounge of the hotel. The community was more posh than most of those back home, but that was common of France. Most English wizards and witches were more comfortable in a classical setting and this was certainly true of Severus; true to such an extent, in fact, that he immediately sat at a very small and awkwardly shaped table in the corner, uncomfortably perusing the crowd.

It took longer than he expected but he was approached, eventually, by several people - three, in fact, before someone worth his time came along. "Can I buy you a drink?" were the first words out of the man's mouth. Severus turned his head and looked up at the sandy haired American standing beside him. They maintained eye contact for a few moments, then the man let out a nervous chuckle. "I'm sorry if that was forward. I just read one of your articles recently … you're working on a sleeping potion, yes?"

He was the only person who'd come along who didn't use the war as a reason to strike up a conversation. For this he was glad in abundance; even if all he cared about was bedding a war hero, then at least he had the decency to prod intellectually first.

Severus nodded. "I am. Please, have a seat." He gestured to the chair beside him and the man sat down eagerly.

"I'm Sam," he said, holding his hand up to flag down a cocktail waitress. "Firewhiskey?" he asked. Severus nodded. "Two, please," he said, looking back at Severus. "Your articles are _legendary_," Sam said looking deadly serious.

"_Legendary_?" Severus asked. "That seems a bit of an embellishment..."

"I assure you it isn't," Sam replied. "At least not in my house. I have everything you've ever written in a journal. I've been coming to Eurpoean Conferences for years just hoping to run into you. I _hate_ these things. You're . . . you've made potions an art form, Master Snape." Sam had put a little more emphasis on his title than was strictly necessary. His smile was big and completely amazing. It could suck one in instantly, or at least it did Severus. "I'll admit I have a crush on you."

"You're very handsome, Sam. Please call me Severus," he said with a light smile, appreciating the enthusiasm the man seemed to have just for meeting him. It went beyond just wanting his fame or money. This guy had a crush on him rooted entirely in respect for his accomplishments.

Sam was still grinning. "Severus. You're handsome, too." He didn't buy that for a second, but he himself had fallen victim to intellectually-based infatuations. There was no accounting for taste. "Tell me about your progress with the sleep potion," he eagerly requested.

Severus couldn't help but laugh thinking of Harry passed out for over thirty six hours. "Incredibly effective thus far. The test subject responds to it well. As do I. I'm optimistic."

Sam nodded as the waitress set the drinks down in front of them. "I can't wait to read about it. Of course, I wouldn't stop you talking about it if you're in the mood. Wouldn't stop you talking about _anything_, actually."

"Well, I could think of a number of things I wouldn't mind _talking_ to you about, but perhaps we should retire to more private surrounds," Snape replied.

Sam stared at him for several long moments, his mouth slightly open. Finally, he nodded. "We could head up to my room, if you wanted."

"I do want." Snape finished off his drink and stood up. "Shall we?"

Grinning, Sam drained his glass and led Severus to his room. "I didn't expect a guest," he began explaining as soon as the door opened. He began gathering papers that were laid out on the bed and tucked them under a knapsack on the table. "I know. Who goes to Paris and works?" He walked over to Severus and smiled. "I bet your room is bigger than mine," he whispered with a wink.

"Unfortunately not, I only decided to attend at the last minute and was barely able to get a room," he lied easily. In truth the hotel had bent over backwards, securing one of their best suites for him, but he had a steadfast rule against bringing anyone home with him. It was a rule that always made the leaving much easier.

Sam laughed nervously. "That was meant to be innuendo," he replied tentatively. He turned and went back to the bed, then sat on the edge. "I'm sorry. When you said you wanted to talk in private, I just thought . . .."

Snape looked at the handsome man in front of him. He had been thinking that when Sam had approached him. The young man was everything Snape could ask for in a companion for the evening; charming, well spoken, intelligent, eager. Now that he was there though, he couldn't keep himself from thinking about another wizard who matched that description. A wizard with emerald green eyes and messy black hair. But of course that man was the reason he'd set out on this adventure in the first place.

"I'm sorry, I'm a little out of practice," he said.

He watched nervously as Sam stood back up and closed the distance between them. Their lips brushed together lightly as Sam whispered, "I find that impossible to believe." Severus's pulse quickened as Sam ran his fingers down Severus's neck and kissed him. Unfortunately it was because it reminded him of that night. Harry had caressed his scars without the look of revulsion most had when they saw them for the first time, if they saw them at all. Sam was a good kisser, direct, a little forceful, exactly what Severus preferred. All he could think of was how softly the brat had kissed him and how he wanted to feel that again.

Sam backed up a couple of steps and, smiling, pulled his sweater and t-shirt off. "You're a good kisser," he said as he came back to Severus. Sam kissed him again as he began unbuttoning Severus's shirt.

Severus put his arms around him and tried to block out thoughts of Potter and despite the distraction before him he was unable to do so. As much as knew that this was nothing more than a one night stand, he could not bring himself to bed a man while thinking of another. Slowly he pulled away from the kiss. He looked down into the man's light brown eyes. "I'm sorry. I can't do this." He kissed him once more and walked out of the room.

Back in his hotel room, Severus sat at the window. Evidently his suspicion he merely needed to get laid was dead wrong. In fact, he began to suspect he might rather be with Potter than anyone else. If he couldn't follow through with someone as bloody perfect as Sam was, then he had to believe he was well-ruined for anyone else.

Ruined. And by _Harry Potter_. Ruined by the guy who, less than forty eight hours before, was wanking to Severus's deepest desires in the Mirror of Erised. A real _catch_, in other words. Severus rolled his eyes and finished off a glass of Firewhiskey. Damn Potter and his arrogance. He added some of his sleeping potion to his next glass and hied himself to bed before he could drive himself completely insane by continuing to think about Potter.

He spent the next five days holed up in his hotel room drinking and thinking, then sleeping when those activities became too exhausting. He wished he'd brought his pensieve, but even if he had there was no reason to believe he would have made any more progress than he had without it. He returned to Hogwarts the day before the students with a plan. It wasn't one of his best plans he had to admit, but it was only temporary until he could gather more intelligence.

Rumor had it Severus had returned but Harry had seen nothing of him. He had tried going to his quarters, but the man never answered and Harry didn't think it was a good idea to let himself in just now. So after a week of neither seeing, nor hearing from the Headmaster, he decided to write him a letter.

_Dear Severus,_

_I would really like to meet with you as soon as possible. Are you available for a drink this __ evening?_

_Harry _

He used one of the school owls to send it so that Severus wouldn't know who it came from until after he'd opened it. Of course, there was nothing compelling him to reply, and Harry considered it a significant possibility he wouldn't see one. By the time he sent the owl off he felt certain (disappointingly so) that he wouldn't be hearing from Severus at all.

But he did get a reply. That very day in fact.

_Potter,_

_I don't believe it would be a good idea for us to see each other outside of our professional obligations._

_Snape_

Well there was no way Harry was going to let it go at that, so he promptly wrote a reply.

_Dear Severus, _

_There are matters that need to be discussed immediately. I __**insist **_ _we meet this evening to address this._

_Harry_

He was sure to get a reply to this one. And he did.

_Potter,_

_There is __**nothing **_ _to discuss._

_Snape_

Harry could not believe this man. If ever there were anything that needed to be discussed, amended, it was this. Harry quickly penned his own terse reply.

_Dear Severus,_

_I respectfully disagree._

_Harry_

It took less than an hour to get a reply,

_Potter,_

_You have no say in this._

_Snape. _

Harry sighed when he read this. The man could be so bloody stubborn sometimes. He was worse than Ginny during that time of the month. Undeterred, in fact even more determined, he penned his own response.

_Severus,_

_I'm afraid I do have a say in this. _

_Harry_

_P.S. I'm not giving up. You can' t ignore me forever._

Harry sent off his letter and almost immediately regretted that bit he added at the end. Severus would probably take it as a challenge and Harry knew full well how competent the man was at ignoring him. Indeed, he waited a week before coming to the conclusion that Snape was at least going to attempt to ignore him forever. Or at least the immediate and foreseeable future.

"_Well, if this is how he wants to play it, fine,"_ Harry thought to himself as he spent yet another Friday night alone. Harry would simply have to resort to more creative measures. He knew what he wanted to say to Severus. He'd had it planned out ever since his meeting with Ginny, but it seemed it was going to take some initiative to get the Headmaster alone.

He looked around his sitting room thinking of how best to get the man's attention. That's when he saw the book Hermione had loaned him. He had thumbed through it briefly during the holidays, paying special attention to Snape's own creations, but hadn't really given it much thought since. Now, however, he realized that some of those spells might be just the trick. They would also have the added benefit of showing Severus that he was still interested. Not only that, but that he was even more so now that he'd seen what could be if the two of them ever made it through this mess he'd created.

He picked up the book and perused. Snape may be able to ignore him forever, but he wouldn't be able to avoid him forever. Especially not when there was a dueling club meeting the following Monday. That left him his entire weekend to plan. Luckily, this coincided with Snape having to venture out of his hole for various reasons and Harry saw him a couple of times in the hallways.

Harry took those opportunities to nail Severus with spells from the book Hermione loaned him. It was fun to watch him startle and stop instantly in the halls, especially when the sudden stops resulted in children toppling over like dominoes. Unfortunately, a sixth year ended up in detention under suspicion of blowing in the Headmaster's ear. Harry felt a bit guilty about this (though he'd laughed when it happened). Fortunately, it was Hermione's week doing detention and she could be convinced to go light on the boy. Especially if he threatened her. Of course, she would remind him it was his own ridiculous behavior that led to that detention in the first place and he should just knock it off and give Severus more time. He would remind her she loaned out Severus's property. She'd do whatever he said.

He unfortunately didn't see Severus at all on Monday until he walked into the Great Hall at eight p.m. for the D.C. meeting. Severus was already there and the platform was set up which of course meant a demonstration. "_Perfect,"_ Harry thought to himself. Severus had handed him the opportunity to get his attention and Harry was going to make the best of it. So he joined Snape on the platform and waited to see what the man was up to.


	7. Chapter 7

Potter's smug expression annoyed Severus down to his final nerve. He wasn't at all ready to deal with the brat. It was fortuitous that it was happening at Dueling Club, however. He supposed he had to deal with Potter eventually and, they having agreed to sponsor the club, were at liberty to pull no punches. He would eagerly take the opportunity to alleviate his frustrations with Harry on the Dueling platform.

"_You could also alleviate those frustrations in bed," _he reminded himself. He shook the thought off and began to address the group. "To welcome you back for the new term, Professor Potter and I are going to give you a little demonstration." Severus said, even though Harry hadn't actually agreed to the demonstration. "Professor Potter?" Severus inclined his head to Harry before taking his place at the other end of the platform. Not even waiting to see if the brat was ready, he turned to fire a hex at him and was caught off guard by a Jelly-Legs Jinx, causing the students to snicker. He muttered the counter curse and was hit with a Steleus Hex in the time it took him. This time he didn't bother to counter it before throwing a Stupefy the brat's way. Unfortunately the curse was less than effective due to his uncontrollable sneezing.

"_Clearly the brat really is that stupid if he thinks I'm playing today,"_ Severus thought savagely as he blocked a Tarantallegra Jinx. Severus non-verbally sent a Levicorpus, which Harry dodged, before sending a Bat Bogey Hex his way. Severus managed to throw a shield charm up just in time, giving Harry the opportunity to throw a Rictusempra as soon as it was down. It wasn't a well known fact, but Severus was actually very ticklish, and Harry was one of the few people who did know. They'd been walking home from the Hog's Head after ringing in the new year together their fifth year of teaching together. They'd walked because they'd been too drunk to Apparate to the gates. They'd been too drunk to walk too, but they'd been certain they could manage, and did in fact manage until just past the gates when Severus slipped on the ice and Harry had tried to catch him. He was unsuccessful in this endeavor, but had managed to get his hands on Severus's waist before they both fell down together. The way they fell had caused Harry's hands to travel up his sides causing him to giggle like a school girl, an unfortunate side effect of being tickled that Severus had never been able to conquer. Harry had then preceded to tickle him under the guise of helping him up while drunkenly apologising. That was the night Severus realized exactly what he wanted from Harry. None of these things mattered now as he cast a silencio on himself to smother the giggles. Of course that made the students' laughing seem even louder.

"_I'm going to kill him,"_ he thought as he cast a non verbal Anteoculatia Hex which Harry was unable to block due to his own distraction at Severus's giggling. _ "It turned out alright the last time I killed a professor in front of a student."_ He quickly banished that thought, it was too distracting. Clearly as he allowed himself to be hit square on with a _Spina Tinclian_, a charm he himself had invented during his school days. It was meant to seduce, not to duel. Thank Merlin for _Silencio_. The moan which would've escaped him might've been damaging to young minds.

Furious, but still attempting to remember he was in front of children, he threw _Furnuculus_ Harry's way, enjoying the children's laughter as the word 'SNOOP' spelled out in boils on Potter's forehead. Potter hit him with the _Handlen Heer_, another of his seduction charms. It gave one the sensation of someone running their hands through one's hair. He, too, was a sucker for that. He threw the same curse right back at him following immediately with another Levicorpus. This time he nailed him and approached him at a leisurely pace.

Though Potter was upside down, their faces were almost even with each other. It was a somewhat odd experience. He removed the silencing charm before hissing in Potter's ear, "You dare use my own spells against me?"

The brat just smiled at him. Severus stepped back and banished Potter's clothes, leaving his boxers simply so he wouldn't get complaints from parents. "Do you concede?"

"Absolutely not," Potter replied righting himself. "_Expelliamus_!" Severus watched helplessly as his wand flew into Potter's outstretched hand just as the hour glass tolled the end of the meeting. Harry wasted no time in running from the hall, Severus's wand still in hand.

"Back to your houses!" he commanded of the group. Children scurried quickly toward the exit. Severus stood, staring at that door and seething at the audacity of that arrogant little snot. "I'll kill him," he mumbled as he stepped down off the platform and began pacing in circles. "I'll KILL HIM!" he exclaimed, turning quickly and heading toward the corridor.

The anger was rooted entirely in frustration. That duel had left Severus more than a little turned on. In that second, he wanted nothing more than to corner the little twerp and bend him over his desk. Unfortunately, the brat would be hiding somewhere so there was no point looking for him. He'd be too much a coward to be seen by _anyone_ after what had just happened. Instead, Severus would make his way over to the Weasley's quarters where Hermione would have very much to explain to him, indeed. She'd given his book to Potter; there was no other way for him to know _Handlen Heer_.

He knocked viciously on the door to the Weasley's chambers, still seething from the duel.

Hermione opened up, a lump already in her throat. "Professor," she said, hesitantly.

"Ms. Granger," he snarled, watching with pleasure as she gulped and cleared her throat.

"Come in, sir," she finally said. He stepped past her dramatically and spun around to look at her, robes billowing around him, standing firm. "I was just about to have a cup of tea. Would you care for one?" Severus stood firm, still staring at her. After an awkward moment, she went toward the kitchenette and poured two cups of tea. Severus followed.

"Have you been enjoying those books I leant you?" he asked her, suspiciously.

"They're quite fascinating, sir. Very informative."

Severus nodded. "Indeed. Anything in particular you enjoyed? Or taught to someone else?"

Hermione pursed her lips and pretended to think. "No, nothing I can recall. Why? Has someone complained?"

"Oh, no. No _complaints_. Not by any means," he admitted, frustrated. "No complaints. I'll be needing _Charms For Charming_ back, please," he requested.

The look on her face betrayed her guilt. "Sure. Let me go get it for you." She couldn't seem to get out of the room fast enough.

Severus wasn't alone for more than a minute before Ron came into the kitchen. "What's up, sir?" Ron asked. "I was just gonna make a sandwich. Do you want something?"

Severus almost turned him down, but realized he could gather more intelligence speaking with Ron. "I _am_ feeling a bit peckish, thank you."

He stood in the corner watching as Ron pulled a large container from the refrigerator. "So what brings you by tonight?" he asked.

"I needed some of my books back," Severus replied, annoyed. Only Ron would fail to take notice of how furious Severus clearly was and remain in casual conversation. How the boy made it as an Auror he would never comprehend.

"Ah. So Harry's being irresponsible with your spells again, then."

Severus's fury compounded five times. "To put it mildly."

Ron rolled his eyes. "I can't believe how much bollacksing I take for being oblivious. I _told_ him not to, but will he listen to me? Of course not. Who does? I'm just clueless Roonil Wazlib, standing here speaking and no one hears."

Severus frowned, unimpressed. "I'm so sorry to hear that no one's listening, _Cassandra_, but I don't much care."

Ron shrugged casually. "I told him not to push you. He can't help himself with you."

Severus's pulse raced a bit at the last statement. "You told him not to push me?"

Ron glanced at him. "You think I won Hermione with my looks?" They stared quietly at one another for a moment. "Fancy a game of chess?" Ron asked.

"Perhaps another time," Severus said with a sigh. "I really need to go. No pointing in waiting on your wife to RETURN THE BOOK I LEANT HER," he drawled loudly, imagining Hermione cringing in the next room.

"Here, take this with you," Ron said, handing out a sandwich wrapped in a napkin. "Let me know about that chess match."

Severus stormed out of their quarters and made his way to Harry's. Once again he found himself challenged by the charms Potter had put up to keep people like him out. Unsurprisingly, the brat wasn't there. _"That's alright," _ he thought to himself settling into his chair by the fire. _"I can wait." _

Harry paced Severus's chambers nervously. The additional harm he'd added to Severus's would alert him in time to get into position. He'd cleared up the antlers and boils as soon as he'd gotten there and now there was nothing he could do but wait. He wasn't sure what to do about his state of undress. It seemed ridiculous to Accio his clothes and he wasn't sure how Severus would respond to him borrowing something of his. He also wasn't sure that mostly naked was not in fact the best way to deal with Severus. It could serve as a useful distraction.

Harry spent most of the night reading a biography of Nicholas Flamel. Severus finally returned to his chambers at five o'clock in the morning. His fury had waned substantially in the time he'd been apart from Harry, as Harry'd hoped. "Of course you're in my chambers," Severus began complaining, eyes rolling, as soon as he entered the room. "What do you want from me, Potter? Why are you bothering me? Why won't you just leave me the bloody hell alone? And give me my bloody wand back!"

"I'm afraid I can't do that, Severus. _Petrificus Totalus_!" Harry followed immediately with a hover charm to keep Severus from falling to the floor. He levitated him to the couch, doing his best to make him comfortable before resuming his seat.

"I really didn't want to have this conversation with you like this, but your insistence in avoiding me has forced my hand." Harry sighed, "It has come to my attention that you are aware of a certain indiscretion of mine that occurred on Boxing Day. It was arrogant, invasive, and harmful and for that I apologise. I also know that you'd like to pretend that it didn't happen, but it did and as grievous as my actions were, I am not sorry to have seen what I saw." He swallowed nervously thinking of some of the things he'd seen and fighting an erection. "I just wanted to know if you wanted the same things I wanted. I didn't trust you to tell me and I should have. I have an offer for you," he continued pulling some hairs out of his head and putting them the table. "I had some Polyjuice Potion to give to you as well, but it was in my robes."

Severus eyed the hairs on the table then looked back up at Harry. It was the first time in more than a month that Severus had voluntarily shown Harry anything with his eyes. He knew what Harry was offering him. Harry cleared his throat, "I'm going to lift the curse and give you your wand back, I am at your mercy." Harry stood up. "_Finite Incantatem_," he said before handing Severus his wand and sitting back down.

Severus laid on the couch holding his wand and staring up at Harry. He sat up and remained on the couch as he kept his eye on Harry's. Severus didn't speak - _ wouldn't _speak, Harry assumed - for a long time. Finally, absentmindedly, he began. "There is nothing I can imagine that could come up in that mirror which would make me forgive you for what you did. There's certainly nothing to justify it."

"There isn't," Harry admitted readily. "But I'm hoping that eventually we might be able to . . .," he paused to consider his words, ". . . move past this. I will not allow myself the hope that you'll ever forgive me, but I'm more than happy to spend the rest of my life making it up to you."

Severus glared at Harry for the longest time. Literal minutes passed by, just sitting together, Severus glaring, Harry looking at him softly. Severus's jaw finally stiffened and he shook his head. "As intriguing as that idea is, I'm not sure that I want to anymore. I need time to think about it."

"I understand," he said standing to go. "I'm going out of town for a few days, I'll be back Saturday afternoon. I've arranged for Ron and Luna to cover my classes. Don't worry," he added, seeing the look on Severus's face. "I've left detailed lesson plans and they both are veterans, it'll be fine. Hopefully I'll see you when I get back."

Severus made no response and Harry showed himself out and hurried to his quarters. Once there he grabbed his bag and Flooed directly to Grimmauld Place. He wouldn't be difficult to find, and Harry couldn't decide if this was a good thing or a bad thing. Knowing Severus it could be a little bit of both. He left his bag in the kitchen and headed to the sitting room. He'd sent Kreacher ahead of him to get the house ready for occupation, however brief, and found the fire already lit and a decanter and glass waiting for him. He was glad that he and Kreacher had a better relationship, but he hated to think he might be that predictable.

He threw himself on the couch and stared up at the ceiling. For some reason he couldn't help but think of the night he'd discovered Severus was ticklish. They'd rung n the New Year at the Hog's Head with Aberforth and Harry had made the mistake of trying to keep up with Severus. That had only spurred the man to drink even more. The result was that they were too pissed to even walk up to the castle (not that it stopped them from trying). Severus had slipped and Harry had tried to save him from the inevitable fall, but had succeed only in making Severus giggle and falling down himself. That night was the first time he'd ever heard Severus laugh.

Since then he'd done everything in his power to hear make it happen as often as possible, though until the duel he hadn't resorted to tickling. He looked over at the decanter that was becoming more attractive by the moment. He wondered what Severus was thinking, but for the first time in a long time he realized there was nothing he could do but pray that Severus would tell him. He sincerely hoped the man would take him up on his offer. There was nothing he wanted more in the world than to fix things with Severus. Even if he couldn't have what was in the mirror, he at least hoped that they could eventually be friends again. As much as he wanted more, as much as he knew there was absolutely no one else he could now be with, he knew he would settle for whatever scraps Severus decided to throw his way. He would, in fact, wait forever for this man. That was his last conscious thought before sleep finally claimed him.

He woke up sometime around one to find a plate of sandwiches and a large glass of pumpkin juice had replaced the decanter and tumbler. He sat up and pulled the table over so he wouldn't have to move to eat. After demolishing his lunch he got up and stretched before heading for the loo and an extra long shower. His dreams hadn't helped his current frustrations.

Once he'd cooled down and dressed he stared around his room and wondered what he was going to do with himself for the next four days. He knew for a fact he didn't want to sit around the house the entire time. It wasn't nearly as gloomy as it had once been, but he couldn't bear the thought of being cooped up there. He finally decided to visit Diagon Alley and George, flooing to The Leaky Cauldron before he could think better of his decision.

He managed to make it out of the pub with little fuss and into Diagon Alley proper. He hadn't made it as far as Fortescue's before it started. People coming up to him wanting pictures, autographs, to shake his hand, or, as one woman had done, to follow offering an excessive amount of praise and thanks for his past accomplishments. He wished he'd brought his invisibility cloak. Luckily there were others - namely Florean and Ollivander - who were more than glad to run a little interference for him. With their help he actually managed to make it to Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes in under twenty minutes, a record time for Harry.

The store was inordinately quiet. Harry paused as always at the makeshift memorial George had set up in the front of the store, the "Wall of the Phoenix", as George called it. It had originally been little more than a shrine to Fred, but as others began sending in photographs and Orders of Merlin that had been awarded posthumously to various members, it had grown into something larger. Even some living recipients had donated their own awards, himself and Severus included (though Severus's donation, until recently, had been by default).

He made his way towards the back knowing he'd find George in the development lab. He passed Lee on his way and gave him a wave. He was not dissappointed when he found George exactly where he thought he would. Unfortunately, he entered just as something exploded, knocking him on his ass. The smoke cleared as Harry sat up and checked himself for injuries. There were a few cuts and there'd be bruises in a couple of hours, but otherwise he seemed fine. He stood up looking for George and found he'd taken refuge under a table and was also largely unscathed.

He held his hand out to his friend to help him up. "There aren't any long lasting side effects that I should be worried about are there?" he asked with a grin.

"Not that I know about," the red head replied. "What brings you by today, Harry? Shouldn't you be in class?"

"Skiving off today. Didn't Luna tell you she's covering a couple of my classes this week?"

"She might have mentioned it," he drawled eyeing him carefully. Harry bore the scrutiny with a practiced boredom. He'd learned from a master and could now deploy a shield of disinterest and apathy at the drop of a hat. It was a skill that came in handy, particularly around a family as perceptive and open as the Weasleys. They were wonderful, but didn't always appreciate the notion that not everything should necessarily be shared with the entire family.

"Alright, I'll let you keep your little secret, for now," George finally continued. "But don't think you can hide from us forever, especially not when Mum is pestering me to find out what's wrong with you."

Harry groaned. If Molly had figured out something was wrong already then it was only a matter of time before she dragged it out of someone. He really hoped Severus would make some sort of move soon. Molly might not be a Legillimens, but she had an uncanny knack for extracting information. The last thing he needed was for her to try her hand at matchmaking.

"Exactly," his friend said following his thoughts with ease.

"Thanks for the warning," Harry replied.

"What are brothers for?" George asked slinging his arm around Harry's shoulders. "So was there anything in particular you were looking for, or were you just in the neighborhood?"

"Just in the neighborhood. What are you working on? Maybe I could give you a hand," Harry said surveying the work bench.

"You're a brave man if you're willing to help me," George said before launching into a description of his latest invention. Harry spent the next three hours experimenting with George and throwing around ideas for how to stabilize the product. By the time Harry left he, was in a much better mood. That was of course, until he was accosted outside of Quality Quidditch Supplies by the same witch who'd cornered him at the wedding.

"Harry," she purred grabbing his arm. "It's such a pleasure to see you again. Maybe now we could finish our . . . uh . . . conversation from that night."

Harry rolled his eyes. How anyone could be that oblivious was a mystery to him. Other than telling her to piss off, he wasn't sure how else he might be able to get her to realize he was not interested. He was beginning to think he would, in fact, have to do that or something equally as rude if he wanted to escape her. She was gripping his arm rather tightly and it was starting to go numb. She rubbed up against him even as he tried to discretely pull away from her. She took that as a sign that he was willing to follow her wherever she planned on leading him.

"Perhaps if we go somewhere private we won't be interrupted this time. Your weird boss isn't following you around today too is he?" She asked, unaware Harry did not share her opinion of Severus.

"I beg your pardon?" he asked giving her the chance to save herself.

"Severus may be a war hero, but he's still the bat of the dungeons. Some things will never change." She laughed merrily at her own words. "I mean it was nice of you to invite him, but surely he didn't think you were there _together_, or that you might not leave with someone desirable."

Harry stopped abruptly and roughly removed her arm from his arm. "Severus may not have been there 'with me', but he had every right to expect my company for the entirety of the evening. As for his intervention, I assure you it was most welcome. As flattering as your attentions undoubtedly are **I am not interested**."

She laughed and reached for his arm again, unperturbed by his avoidance of her grip. "I'm sorry, OK? Severus is a great man, and your devotion to your friends is sweet. But you really expect me to believe you're not interested? If it's your reputation you're worried about, I assure you that I am the soul of discretion. No need to play so hard to get with me."

"This isn't about playing hard to get," he blurted out, coming dangerously close to losing his temper entirely.

"Then what is about? Are you old fashioned? Want to take it slow?" she said in what Harry assumed was meant to be a seductive manner. She leaned forward, backing him up against a wall as he tried to maintain distance between them.

"Forget it. You aren't what I'm looking for"

"What makes you so sure of that?" she asked, placing her hands on his chest and running them lightly down to his waist.

"Because I'm in love with someone!" he practically shouted. If people hadn't been watching them before, they certainly were now. _ "Great," _ he thought as he extricated himself from the dumbfounded witch and began fighting his way through the gawking bystanders. He was nearly blinded when a flash bulb went off. "_Even better_," he thought as he stumbled into Ollivander's. "_Now everyone's going to know I'm pining away for someone who won't have me and just might end up killing me. Especially now_."

Ollivander was kind enough to let Harry use his fireplace to floo back to Grimmauld and this time Harry wasted no time in pouring himself a drink from the decanter Kreacher had left out for him. He finished it off, passing out once again on one of his couches.

He woke up the next morning with a terrible headache. Luckily Kreacher had left him a hang over potion. Unfortunately he'd also left a copy of The Daily Prophet. Just as Harry knew it would be the front page was splattered with his picture and the headline, "_Harry Potter In Love!_" He tossed it aside and went to the loo before dragging himself off to bed. Maybe locking himself in the old house wasn't such a bad idea after all.

In his chambers, Severus sat on the couch and stared absently at a spot on the floor. "_Harry Potter In Love!_" He chuckled and rolled his eyes again just thinking of it. Under ordinary circumstances he'd have been terribly annoyed at the possibility Potter was trying to make some stir. Circumstances were far from ordinary, however, as he'd spent the morning partaking of herbal depressants grown by Hogwarts's own Neville Longbottom. Surprisingly enough, the boy grew up to be useful in some way, shape or form. As a result, Severus could laugh about what sad nonsense passed as news. He sighed. At least there were no murderous lunatics bent on world domination on the loose. None with a real shot at it, anyway.

Neville's considerable gift for hydroponic botany had led to a sort of friendship between himself and Severus (as well as a number of other Veterans). Having run out of "The Herb" that morning, he'd sent for Neville, knowing the boy's still deeply-rooted (though well-veiled) irrational fear of him gave him top priority for delivery (not to mention pickings). A rapping came at the door and he looked down at his watch. Longbottom was early; this was for the best as Ginny was expected within the hour.

Severus sighed and got up to answer the door. Sure enough it was Neville, nervous as always. Severus quickly escorted him into his sitting room motioning for him to take a seat on the couch. The young man quickly got down to business pulling a fantastically large array of herb on the table for Severus's inspection. As always, the quality was exceptional. It was a shame it wasn't a talent Neville could openly share with the world. Strictly speaking, it wasn't illegal, but it was rather frowned upon.

"Thank you for being so prompt Professor Longbottom," Severus drawled as he poured them both a drink.

"Anything for my best customer," he replied nervously. "As you can see, I've been experimenting with some new strains," he said, indicating the plants laid out before him like an indulgent buffet. But then, was there any other kind of buffet?

Severus picked them up one by one and smelled them, indulging in the pungent aroma which relaxed him so. What a day for nerves. "Have you tried any of these yourself?" he asked Neville as he fiddled with one that was particularly aromatic.

"No," he admitted hesitantly, "But George has." He slapped his hand over his mouth as if the lone twin's extracurricular activities were any sort of secret. Individuals that smart and talented tended to need the occasional dulling of the senses; factoring in the effects of the war, Severus wouldn't be surprised if it was more than occasionally. He'd certainly begun indulging more after the war.

"George's secrets are safe with me, Neville," he said, hoping to put Longbottom at ease with the use of his first name. "I have an admirable track record of keeping things to myself."

"Yes, of course," he stammered. "Anyway, uh, he found this one," he paused picking up a sample Severus hadn't yet examined and holding it out to him, "Was particularly, uh, enjoyable." Neville looked around Severus's quarters - anything to avoid having to make eye contact with the man. Severus noticed his attention had been caught by the copy of The Prophet he'd tossed on the ground earlier. He picked it up scanning the article.

Severus sat sniffing the buds absentmindedly. Why not strike up a conversation with Longbottom? "Interesting, isn't it?" he asked as he pulled a bud off of the stem and began tearing it into small pieces on the desk. Neville didn't discourage sampling.

"I hadn't realized Harry was seeing anyone. Not that I'd be the one he'd confide in, but to have heard nothing of it before now . . .. Well, if Harry's in love, I'm happy for him. He deserves some happiness. Whoever it is must be special. Harry doesn't just go for anyone, especially not now."

Severus pushed the mutilated buds into a pipe. "Harry's prone to melodrama and hyperbole. I suspect that's what these vigilant reporters have overheard." He took a draught from the pipe and offered it to Neville who hesitated before accepting and taking a hit. Severus appreciated that even if the boy would always be a bit weary around him, he finally trusted him. Neville didn't generally join him.

After he'd released the smoke he leaned back and stared at Severus. "Harry may have a flair for the dramatic, but he's never gone so far as to publicly declare his love for anyone. Even when he Ginny were together it was simply taken as a known fact. He didn't say often, least of all in front of strangers. And we all thought that they'd eventually marry." Severus took another drag and passed the pipe back to Neville who accepted readily.

Severus found himself wondering why Neville hadn't noticed Harry wasn't leaving the castle with any greater frequency than he ever had. He supposed it wasn't like a Gryffindor to be especially observant. It wasn't like a Longbottom to be especially cognisant. "Interesting that it didn't work out between them," he replied. "There's no actual evidence he's been in love with anyone, is there?" Severus asked, beginning to worry he'd smoked a bit too much to pursue much more dialogue with Neville. He tried not to _think _ of love, let alone _speak _ of it. But he had an excuse and an opportunity. "I mean, has anything actually been different in his life?"

Neville considered this before answering, in fact he took so long Severus began to suspect that maybe Neville had smoked too much, but finally he spoke. "Depends on what you mean by different. From what I can tell his habits haven't really changed. He still goes about like he normally does."

"But . . .," Severus prompted.

"But now that I think on it there has been something new about Harry. He smiles more, looks less haunted. He's never talked to me about it, but the Cruciatus Curse often leaves marks that aren't obvious, and I'm sure he felt his fair share of it during the war. I know he gets . . .," he paused, thinking, ". . . used to get insomnia. Sometimes I would see him wandering the grounds at night, but that hasn't happened since the new year started, so I can only hope that he's getting more sleep." Neville took another hit. Severus really couldn't say anything; until Galleons exchanged hands it was technically still his. "Now that I think about it, he just seems happier. It's like he's finally figured out what it is that he wants."

Severus nodded slowly, staring at the pipe in Neville's hand. He took it back and smoked a bit. "It sounds as though you know a bit more on this subject than do I," he said, exhaling. "Only Harry can know if he's happy. Perhaps you're right. This is good," he added quickly, handing the pipe back over to Neville. "I'll take some of it." He watched as Neville began bagging some up for him. "Have you any ideas about who this girl is? Who Potter is in love with?" What did Neville know about Harry's sexuality, Severus wondered.

Neville just cracked up at that and Severus waited none too patiently as he waited for his company to settle down. "I'm not sure I should comment on that."

Apparently, he was aware. "I know of Potter's proclivities Longbottom."

"Oh. Well - then, I have a guess, but it's not really my place to tell. Especially if I'm right. But then again, just because it's the only person I can think of doesn't mean that Harry hasn't secretly been sneaking out of the castle on a regular basis to meet with someone else." He handed Severus his order and looked expectantly at him.

"This is all between us, Neville. You know I'm not one to gossip, but I'll admit to a certain curiosity on this subject," he said, hoping Neville would confess to what he thought. "Especially considering he isn't leaving Hogwarts often."

"Well," he began slowly, "The only person at Hogwarts that I can see Harry becoming interested in is . . .," he paused, clearly uncomfortable. "Well, certainly you're smart enough to put this one together. I'm a little surprised he hasn't told him himself. Harry isn't known for sitting around and doing nothing, and if anyone in this school knows what's really going on with everyone it would be you."

Severus handed some Galleons to Nevile as there came another knock at the door. Neville nearly fell from his chair. Severus laughed. "It's only Ginerva. Enter!" He called out.

Ginerva walked in taking in the scene quickly. "No wonder you're so relaxed these days, Severus." She looked over at Neville and the discarded Prophet before turning back to Severus. "Should I come back later? It seems I might be interrupting."

Severus shook his head. "Not at all. Would you excuse us? Urgent and the like." Neville nodded and left for his chambers.

Ginny took Neville's vacated chair, waving away the proffered pipe. "I'm not sure where I should even begin," she said, glancing once more at the Prophet. "Perhaps business first? Or would you rather get the uncomfortable 'girl talk' out of the way? Or perhaps I should move straight to pleading for Harry's life. I can't imagine you're very pleased with him right now, especially after everything that's happened since Christmas."

Severus suddenly wished he weren't too high to overreact. "What do you know of what's happened since Christmas?" he asked casually.

"Harry came to me, after you left Hogwarts," she said softly.

He nodded, holding his breath. "And what did he have to say about it?" he asked on a wave of smoke.

"He said that he was the reason," she paused gathering up her courage before continuing. "He told me what he did."

"Really?" he asked. "What exactly? Because I'm willing to bet he didn't tell you everything if you want to save his life."

"Maybe I_ will _have some of that if you don't mind," she said, holding her hand out for the pipe. Severus handed it over willingly and watched as she took a hit. Who knew what secrets she might let slip under the influence? She slowly exhaled before answering him. "He used some of your hair to create Polyjuice Potion and then he Confunded that blasted mirror so he would be able to see your fantasies, or whatever it is that it is supposed to show. And no, he didn't tell me what he saw, and I don't want to know. You now have something to hold over me for the rest of our lives Severus."

He chuckled. "Believe me, I wouldn't hold it over you. And I know little more about what he witnessed than you do. And I have access to my own _mind_, so you'd think I'd have some clue. Whatever it was, it was obviously agreeable to him."

"Yeah it was," she remarked before taking another hit. "How do you not know what he saw? They're your fantasies after all."

"Fantasies I've tried to bury, but I'm too weak to do it. They're impossible - stubborn, I mean. Highly inappropriate and inexplicably fascinating. I suppose I'd spy on them, too,"

"Yet, something tells me you haven't. Perhaps now would be the time to do so, especially if you're going to take Harry up on his offer," she offered conversationally and more relaxed than he'd ever seen her. He could only stare at her, wide eyed. She looked up at him and shrugged. "Did you honestly think he came up with that brilliant plan on his own? Harry's not stupid by any means, but I think we can both agree that he is, in fact, an idiot. Of course both of us knew this before we took up with him, so perhaps we're the real idiots." She giggled at this thought. It was not as annoying as Severus thought it should have been.

"I don't like to think of either of us as idiots. But then, I don't know how you fell in love with him."

"At first it was just a crush, The-Boy-Who-Lived and all that, but then I actually got to know him, see who he was as a person and I was enchanted. He's so, so . . .," she looked off as she searched for the word she wanted. "Confident. I think that was what really drew me to him, his confidence. Even when he's scared, he's still confident, or at least acts like it. What about you?"

Severus sighed as he raised an eyebrow. "It's ridiculous. I'm not sure you'd understand." He wasn't ashamed of the story or any of the details, but he wanted to remember as little as possible. Even in awe of principles like Harry's, Severus found himself functioning on the basest of human emotion. "But there's loyalty between myself and Harry now. One would think that fact would stop him risking losing my trust. But he has. I'm no less loyal to him, but I'm sick with fury and I want to retaliate. He's given me the option to, as well, but I really don't want to see what goes on in my head." He lifted the pipe to segue. "This," he began, and paused, "this is what keeps things quiet up there. It has the added benefit of of helping me recover from misplaced trust and move on. Won't work on Harry, though. Nothing ever does."

She looked at him thoughtfully. "Harry made a stupid mistake. Granted it was terribly invasive and thoughtless and childish and . . .." She paused here and Severus wondered what other adjectives she might come up with to describe Potter's behaviour. "Bloody _creepy_, when one really thinks about it . . .." There was a grimace on her face as she tried not to think about it. "But," Ginnerva said turning back to him, "His intentions were not to hurt you, however successful he was in doing so, but to understand you better. Yes, there are better ways to go about doing that, but he just wants you so badly he lost the ability to think straight."

"_He wants you badly."_ Severus wondered if Harry had really said as much to Ginerva or if she was using her own language to clear up Potter's intentions. He wasn't the type to say he "wants" someone, nor was he the type to realize that Severus wanted to be "wanted". "And if you were in my shoes? How would _you_ respond to what he did? And how would you bring yourself to forgive him?"

"Well, for starters, I'd find out what Harry saw," she said throwing him a meaningful look. "Then I'd take him up on his offer to find out what he sees, because . . . well, because I could. And then I'd make him pay. He'll never learn his lesson otherwise." Ginerva then smiled in a way that made him grateful he'd never had to face the young witch in a duel.

She was right; he was going to have to suck it up and go to the mirror. Nothing else was likely to put his mind to rest. But the idea made him squeamish. "And how would you make him pay?" He felt like he was sneaking glances at her test paper - not that he'd ever had to cheat on a test. This was one of the few times he couldn't reach a solution on his own.

Ginerva took another hit and leaned back. She just sat there thinking for a long time. She asked Severus a number of questions, which he readily answered, and then sat back and thought some more. Finally, she started throwing out ideas. They sat there for an hour debating exactly what would be the most appropriate punishment for Potter. By the time they were done Severus was certain that Potter would most definitely learn his lesson.

After giving Ginerva her potion, he offered to escort her to Ron and Hermione's chambers. He had decided to take the witch's advice concerning the mirror and now was as good a time as any. He also wasn't sure that he wouldn't think better of it once he was sober and alone again. If nothing else, Ginerva had managed to peak his curiosity enough that for the moment, it trumped his anger. Besides, if Potter were out declaring his love to the public at large, he'd couldn't have seen anything terribly repulsive.

Severus left Ginerva outside of the Weasleys' rooms and continued on with his mission. He entered the room from the secret door wanting a moment to brace himself before facing the inevitable. He approached the mirror from behind, and - just like Potter - took a deep breath, walking around to look at his reflection.

The instant he looked into the mirror he understood the danger. How truly brazen Potter would have to be, how strong of character, to observe anything in that mirror and bring himself to pursue it. Of _course _it drove men mad; after all, fantasies were what they were, but to have them realized . . .. And the risks involved . . . to _do_ something about it? To attempt to _cultivate _ it? There was real appeal in the prospect of sitting in front of that mirror for hours … days, even.

It was so real he believed he could feel Potter's hand on his shoulder, his breath on his neck. Companionable scenes dominated initially and led to more intimate exchanges. Eventually, the sensuality opened the door to sexuality and Severus immediately identified with the urgency in Potter's need for release, so to speak. Indeed, he found himself in a similar predicament compounded by the memory of the last time he found himself in that room. He stifled a soft moan and immediately wondered why he bothered. It wasn't as though he were being watched.


	8. Chapter 8

Saturday morning came too quickly for Harry, each day bringing more and more dread as the speculation of who he loved continued to play out in the media. But Saturday morning did come and he knew that it was time to face the music. _"If I'm lucky, I may still have a job when I wake up tomorrow,"_ he thought to himself as he made his way to the fireplace. He stood there dumbly with a handful of Floo powder in his hand before he threw it in yelling, "Weasley Chambers, Hogwarts!"

He knew it was rude to Floo in unannounced, but he wanted as much of a reprieve as he could get before he faced Severus, who was probably waiting in his quarters to kill him. Ron rushed out from the kitchen, wand at the ready, as Harry straightened himself up.

"You really shouldn't do that without warning mate," Ron said lowering his wand. "Though I can't say I blame you, I'd want to avoid him too if I were you."

"I don't _want_ to avoid him, I _have_ to. Survival mechanism. He's likely to end me if he sees me."

"I wouldn't be so sure of that," Hermione piped in entering from the kitchen. "Ginny was here earlier this week and Severus has been in a much better mood ever since." Hermione smiled brightly as if the idea of his ex-girlfriend talking to his would be lover was a comforting thought.

"Ginny?" He turned to Ron. "Why would Ginny be here?" And what business would she have with Severus?

"She said she needed some sort of potion, I don't know," Ron said taking a seat on the couch. "I learned a long time ago that I generally don't want to know what my sister is up to." Hermione rolled her eyes at this, though Harry rather thought that Ron had a point. Unfortunately, this was one of those times that it was imperative that he know what Ginny was getting up to.

"Ginny doesn't need a reason to be at the castle other than she has friends here. You must have noticed that she and Severus have become close." She paused here to consider her words. "Well, close for the Headmaster that is."

Ginny and Severus _were_ hitting it off. Perhaps it was the idea of Severus hosting guests, though he'd grown accustomed to visiting the man, himself. But he never felt like a _guest_. That, he supposed, was the difference. "Yeah, she might've mentioned something." Of course none of that was what really had him worried. Ginny possessed a number of the same qualities that attracted him to Severus, namely an imaginative vindictiveness and the dominance to do something about it. They were also both too smart for their own good. The idea that they were together, most likely talking, no plotting, about him was fantastically unnerving.

"Ron, would you mind running down to my quarters and retrieving my map and cloak?"

"Why don't you just Floo there?"

"Because he might be there."

"Maybe that wouldn't be such a bad thing." Harry and Ron looked at Hermione as though she were mad. "You're going to have to man up and face him eventually, right? It won't be the first time."

Harry picked up a copy of The Prophet and held it up for Hermione to see. "This little gaffe isn't in keeping with giving Severus time and space or respecting his privacy, things I agreed I'd do at Ron's suggestion. _You_ agreed." He tossed the paper back down where he found it. "I'm not sure he would kill me. I think he'd just crush every hope I have of this working and send me away." He shrugged "I'd rather just avoid him."

They stared at him for a moment before Ron finally spoke. "Look on the bright side mate, at least he knows you're serious now." Ron tried and failed miserably to keep a straight face and started laughing before he'd even finished. Hermione joined in shortly after and Harry couldn't keep hold it together any longer. Ron did have a point, and put like that it was kind of funny.

"All the same," Harry managed, "I'm not terribly keen to have that conversation yet."

"And do you see yourself becoming keen on it any time in the foreseeable future?" Hermione asked.

"Define 'foreseeable future'," he said sheepishly.

Hermione frowned. "There's a reason you can't answer that question, Harry. You can't hide from him forever."

"I don't want to avoid him forever, just for right now."

Hermione approached him and put her hands on his shoulders. "I am already more involved than I wish I was. If you want to hide, fine, but you're not doing it here." With that she firmly led him from their quarters leaving him in the hall alone.

He stumbled into the middle of the hall looking nervously in each direction. The corridor was completely empty. He slowly began making his way back to his chambers, keeping a vigilant eye out for Severus. His pace quickened as he finally realized he would make it back unnoticed.

Harry let out a deep sigh as he closed the door to his chambers. He poured himself a glass of firewhiskey and sat down on the couch. There he found a note.

_Meet __me__at__the __mirror __at__midnight__._

_Severus_

"_Well__at__least __he__signed__his__first __name__this__time__."_ Harry thought to himself. Though he'd handed this opportunity to Severus on a silver platter he was now very, very nervous. The closer the time came the more nervous he became, but he also found himself growing excited. The more he thought about it the more he realized what a good thing this really was. This meant Severus was willing to at least consider Harry. He might yet have a shot.

At the appointed hour he presented himself in the room. Snape was already waiting for him. Harry heard the door close behind him and saw Severus put some sort of non-verbal locking spell on it.

"Hand over your wand Potter."

Severus couldn't help but smirk at the look of trepidation that passed over Potter's face even as he complied with the command. As he took the younger man's wand he allowed his fingers to trace lightly over Harry's causing him to shudder just a bit. Snape pocketed the wand and motioned for Potter to stand not much farther than where he himself had stood only a few weeks earlier.

"Take off your clothes," Snape said. "Slowly," he added as he noticed Potter's haste. Once the young man was completely naked Severus bond him with invisible ropes. Harry gasped at the sensation. "You need to learn self control, Professor Potter. How better than with a practical example?"

Slowly, he circled the restrained wizard in front of him. Severus planned on getting the full view. He was surprised at how many scars he found criss crossing the young man's form. He'd known they were there, but he'd never allowed himself to believe that they would be as extensive as they actually were. Then again, one did not face The Dark Lord as often as they had without picking up a few reminders along the way.

His perusal complete he faced the man once more. Even without touching him it was obvious that he was turned on, though not as obviously so as Severus might have wished. Still, he had a whole hour in which to tease him. Harry would find no satisfaction in this room tonight. Slowly Severus removed his own clothing watching every reaction his movements elicited. He turned around to give Harry the full view as he pulled his own wand out of his robe pockets.

He saw the boy stiffen as he turned and pointed his wand straight at his chest. Severus just smirked. He sent one of his own non-verbal charms his way. He couldn't wait to see the look on Harry's face when he realized exactly what that particular charm did. He summoned the vial of Polyjuice potion from his robes and plucked a hair from Harry's head.

"It's better when the sample is fresh," he said before dropping it into the vial.

Harry cleared his throat. "It's too bad I didn't know that before I went," he remarked suggestively. Severus was unsurprised that Potter was willing to risk incurring his wrath at such a time. Indeed, he suspected Harry was _counting_ on it. He withheld, choosing instead to fire another nonverbal charm at him. Harry writhed a moment, then looked back at Severus with a silent smirk.

Severus placed the hairs in the phial and watched as the color changed from grey to bright gold. "Ever smelled or tasted your own polyjuice before?"

Harry shook his head. "I've seen it. Heard complaints about it."

Severus sniffed the phial and raised an eyebrow. He thrust it quickly under Harry's nose. "Smell it," he commanded.

Harry complied readily. "Grass," he began, staring at Severus. "And rain."

Severus nodded and snatched the phial back to his nose. "Freshly mown," he mumbled. He put a bit on his finger and held it up to Harry's mouth.

Harry observed Severus's finger for a brief second and looked back up at him. "What happens if I taste it?" Severus shrugged and shook his head. Frowning, Harry leaned in and took Severus's finger between his lips. He slid the top of his tongue over the tip.

There were a few moments of silence. "Nothing happens," Severus finally offered.

"It's weird," Harry replied.

Severus nodded. "It always is." He turned the phial upside down and chugged its contents, unwilling to give up a drop regardless of how it might taste. As he finished, he licked his lips and chuckled. "Shepherd's Pie?" he asked with some disbelief. "And is that . . .."

"Dark chocolate," Harry interjected. "It's bitter. Sorry about that."

Severus shrugged. "I don't go in for sweets," he said, his face contorting as he began the uncomfortable transfiguration. Once it was complete, he looked down to realize he really couldn't see much of anything.

"No wonder you're constantly running into things," he said taking the boys glasses and producing a replica for himself. Glasses in place he was finally able to see everything he wanted to. He pointed his wand at the mirror and used the incantation he'd learned from Potter to confund it. "Ready or not," Severus drawled before moving to stand in front of it.

He kept his eyes closed at first, but slowly opened them. At first he thought that it hadn't worked as the images and scenes flashing before him were so similar to his own. But then he realized there were, in fact, slight differences. These scenes seemed brighter somehow and the domestic scenes also included the Weasleys from time to time. Severus had never dared hope he would have a chance with Potter much less that he would want to include him in his wider family as well. All he could do was stare dumbfounded by how happy and relaxed both of them seemed to be.

Then the scenes began to shift. They were in Severus's chambers, only on closer inspection it appeared that they both lived there. Harry was trying to read out loud to Severus as the older wizard ran his hands through his hair. This brought Severus back to reality somewhat as he realized he hadn't yet had the chance to show Potter exactly what the first charm did.

Slowly Severus ran his fingers through his hair, lightly grazing his scalp with his nails. He heard Harry gasp as he also felt the sensation.

"Do you like my little spell Potter?"

Harry chuckled over a moan and shook his head, grinning. "You're incredible."

Severus just smirked. _"__You__won__'__t __find __it __so __incredible __when __you__realize __you__can__'__t __move __your __hands__,"_ he thought to himself before turning his attention back to the mirror.

The scenes had already to moved on to exploits of a more serious nature and Severus let his hands roam at will as he took in Harry's delightful imagination. They were in Severus's study, a favorite of his if he were willing to admit it, but Harry's version took it that one step further from being slightly naughty to down right kinky. It was detention like Severus had never hoped to give out to the impertinent brat.

"Harry," he drawled, "I had no idea you were so...adventurous." He thought back to some of the other tid-bits he'd gleaned from Ginerva so that he could make the best of the literal hands-on education he was about the recieeve regarding how, exactly, to bring Potter to his knees.

"Mm, I suspect you're going to learn a lot you didn't . . .." He looked down. "I can't move."

"Can you not? That'd bethe self control we talked about. You really must learn how to control your impulses Potter." Severus ran his hands over his ass. "Tell me, Professor. Do you like that?"

Harry shivered then tensed visibly. "Let me go."

"No, you will stand there helpless as I did." Severus ran his hands through his hair again and watched as Harry shuddered in delight. "Now, tell me what would you like for me to do?"

Harry stared wide eyed at Severus, or rather at himself, as the man once more raked his hands through his hair. Harry feeling every last bit of it. _"What have I gotten myself into?"_ he thought as Severus began taking his cues from the mirror. Try as he might he could not keep himself from moaning out in pleasure as he felt Severus's hands on his body. It was, by far, the most erotic moment of his life.

He wanted to close his eyes and focus on nothing but the sensations, but watching Severus watching his fantasies was a far greater turn on. And Severus wanted Harry to tell him exactly what he wanted. He highly doubted that he would be getting what he wanted tonight - namely for Severus to shag him senseless right here on the floor of the dirty old classroom.

He nearly fell to his knees. He _would_ have if he hadn't been restrained. Severus teased him mercilessly, alternating between wanking off and simply feeling Harry up seven ways from Sunday. He watched helplessly as Snape ceased his ministrations as soon as he began to transfigure back into himself.

Snape pointed his wand at Harry muttering an incantation before tossing it aside. Harry tried to move, but found it was still an impossibility. Severus brought himself to completion in front of Harry. Harry no longer felt the corresponding touches and wanted to kill the man for denying him his own release.

Snape slowly dressed himself before turning back to him. "Thank you, Potter. You've given me much to think about." That said, he strode from the room. Harry was then released from his bonds.

Snape was an idiot if he thought Harry would let him get away with simply leaving him there. No one ever had the nerve to do something like that to him; he had no idea how truly physically painful the experience was. He growled and whined as he relieved his problem.

Severus returned to his office and threw a few charms up at the door. He wasn't interested in Potter bursting in on him and running his good time. He poured a Firewhiskey, pushed some of Neville's herbs into a pipe and lit up. He was unsurprised to hear Dumbldore's voice come out of nowhere.

"You're looking rather relaxed this evening. Satisfied even," the old man said his eyes twinkling. "May I inquire as to what has brought about this pleasing development?"

Severus nodded. "Of course you may ask. Unfortunately for you, I'll give you nothing more than that I'm very pleased with myself right now."

"Only with yourself?"

Severus chuckled and went back to his pipe for a moment. "_Mostly_ with myself," he replied. "Though I'll admit I had help from others." He chuckled. "Now _there__'__s_ something I never thought I'd hear myself say."

"I never thought I'd hear it either, now that you mention it, but I must say that it pleases me. Am I to take it then that you and Harry have worked out your little spat?"

He drained the glass of Firewhiskey and smiled. "Worked it out? I'm not sure. I'm certainly satisfied we're even." Severus began to wonder what point there was keeping Dumbledore out of the loop. "You may as well know you'll be seeing a lot less of Potter. We'll be keeping our visits to my chambers for the most part."

"And how does Harry feel about being 'even'?" Dumbledore gave him a look, "Why do I get the feeling that are still things that need to be sorted out between the two of you? After all, you're in here talking to me again, not talking to Harry."

"There will _always_ be something that needs to be sorted out between us, I think," Severus admitted. Potter was completely impossible and there was no reason to suspect that would change. He wouldn't _want_it to change, if he were honest. "Having said that, he probably doesn't think we're even."

"Then why aren't you doing what would make you even?"

"Because I'm toying with him," he replied, as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Clearly." He rolled his eyes. "Bloody daft Gryffindor."

"You do realize he is the last living descendant of Slytherin and that one day he will live up to that heritage. Surely you do not want to be on the receiving end of any payback that would ensue."

Severus answered him with a wicked grin. "Actually, I'm not so sure I wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of payback like that."

"I really don't want to know what all of this is about, do I?" Albus asked wearily.

"I don't know," Severus replied carefully. "I wouldn't rule it out. But I'll spare you. Suffice it to say, things are precisely as they should be with Potter."

"If you say so, but I won't be surprised when you find out he disagrees," the old man said merrily. It was almost as if Dumbledore were looking forward to the climax of this little drama as much as Severus was.

"Never once did I suggest he would agree," Severus said. "Or if I did, I didn't mean to. I'm rather looking forward to his next move." He smoked a bit and stared at the wall. "I wonder what he has in mind . . .?" he trailed off.

"I'm sure you'll find out soon enough," replied Albus

"Oh, I promise you, it can't happen soon enough . . .."

Harry knew it was way too late, but he didn't know what else to do and so found himself banging on the door of his friends's quarters at nearly two in the morning. Thankfully the next day was Sunday and they could have a lie in. It took quite a while, but eventually Ron answered the door.

"Harry, what are you doing here? Do you have any idea what time it is?"

"I need to use your Floo."

"Why can't you use your own Floo?"

"Because I can't get into my rooms right now."

"Why can't . . .." Ron stopped himself abruptly. "You know what, it's too late to be having this conversation. You know where it is." With that, his friend let him in and stumbled back to his bed, leaving Harry to find his own way home.

Once he was back in his quarters, Harry poured himself a drink and thought about what had just happened. He was too turned on to go to Severus. His impulses would override his fury and they would have . . . incredibly good sex? He pushed the thought aside. Severus had gone entirely too far in his pursuit of vengeance. It was a fair point that he'd violated Severus's privacy, but he'd never held the man hostage and tortured him. Where'd he get off thinking that was an apt punishment?

Teeth gritted, he muttered a string of obscenities and cursed the chill that ran down his spine as he recalled all-too-clearly that clever spell he'd experienced. Delightful and infuriating. If he were near Severus he'd be as likely to punch him as jump his bones. Perhaps he'd do both. At any rate, it wasn't the right time to go to Severus. Better he take the time to clear his mind of fury and act rationally for once. If not rational then at least with some awareness of his actions and their potential outcomes. He finished off his drink, took a bit of Severus's potion, and went to bed.

Harry woke up the next morning clear headed and intent on finally proving to Severus that he was his equal in all things, even revenge. He summoned Kreacher to inform him that he would be taking all his meals in his room that day. The first point that would be addressed was his lack of wand. Severus had not seen fit to return it last night before he left. This, of course, limited his options.

He had been studying and practicing wandless magic, however; and though it would be years before he was truly proficient, there were a few spells he had managed to master. Harry didn't doubt that Severus would keep his wand on his person as if it were his own. To get his wand back he'd need to get Severus alone. How best to accomplish that?

Afraid carrying it with him to dinner would be too conspicuous, Harry'd dashed off to the Great Hall a few hours before dinner and tucked his invisibility cloak under the table. He'd be able to carry out his plan easily with the cloak handy.

As usual, Severus did a remarkable job pretending Harry didn't exist at dinner. In fact, he might've improved his technique somewhat. Harry ignored him right back. He was not going to give the man the satisfaction of knowing that he'd gotten to him.

Less than halfway through dinner, Severus stood and left, saying little to anyone on his way out. Harry allowed a few seconds to pass before he, too, stood and, taking the cloak, followed Severus out of sight. He tossed on the cloak and carefully made his way down to the Lab behind Severus. He was able to sneak in just before Snape closed and locked it.

He made his way silently to a corner waiting for the perfect time to strike. He watched as Severus wandered about the labs idly not seeming to be able to concentrate. Finally the man sat down on one of the stools and pulled both Harry's wand and his own from his pocket. He laid his own on the table in front of him.

Harry watched as Severus performed a few simple spells with it. For some reason that bothered Harry more than anything else the man had ever put him through. You did not go around using other people's wands without permission. _"__I__can__'__t__believe__he__would__do__that__,"_ Harry thought to himself as he watched Severus begin to move on to more complex magic. Harry took a deep breath, before channeling his temper and summoning both wands to him.

Severus looked up in amazement as both wands flew towards Harry. At the last possible second he dropped his cloak and caught them deftly. Harry silently bound the man before he'd even had a chance to fully comprehend what was going on.

"I think it's time you and I had a little talk, _Headmaster_," Harry drawled in his best impression of Snape. Harry walked towards him and leaned down to whisper in his ear. "I told you I didn't need my wand."

Snape's eyes closed and a smile crept across his face. "Indeed, you did," he finally acknowledged. "I suppose you're keeping in mind I can function admirably without the aid of a wand _or_ an invisibility cloak?" he replied.

"Can you?" Harry eyed him evilly before muttering an awfully long, awfully obscure curse he'd found while doing research for his N.E.W.T. level classes. "Care to give it a go?" He watched as Severus realized exactly what sort of spell Harry had just used on him and then struggled as he tried to free himself.

"It's time you learned about trust Severus."

"I hope you aren't suggesting one should trust a person who has just restrained one unnecessarily," he replied, annoyed.

"Unnecessarily?" Harry asked, circling Severus. "It is in fact entirely necessary, sir." He paused to run his finger up Severus's spine. "And you only have yourself to blame as you're the one who taught me that."

"Oh, I see," Severus mumbled, shivering. "Tell me. What do you intend to teach _me_ today?"

"Trust. Now tell me Severus, what is it that you want?" Harry watched as the man swallowed a number of times before turning his head away. "That is why I have to restrain you to talk to you. Otherwise you'd just throw me out."

"And who could blame me?" Severus replied. "Anyway, you can't force me to talk to you."

"You're right. If I could we wouldn't be in this sorry mess," he said irritably running his hand through his hair. "Because I never would have gone to that mirror as you if you had trusted me enough to be honest with me."

"Ha!" Severus shouted. "You wouldn't have violated my privacy and spied on the depths of my desire if only I'd told you I liked your kiss?" he laughed. "Yes, that seems perfectly reasonable, Potter."

"It is reasonable when you consider that a) I would already have known your desires and b) I was not the only one spying that night." Harry stood to face him and leaned down until his face was inches from Severus's. "You could have said something then, but you stood there and let me do everything I did."

Again, Snape swallowed hard. "What would you have done?"

Harry trailed his fingers along Severus's jaw. "Now that would depend on what I wanted." Harry's hand drifted down to Severus's chest. "Whether I wanted you to see my fantasies or not. Clearly I wanted you to see them. To know them. Did you not want me to know yours?"

"Of course I did. In time." Snape cleared his throat. "I certainly didn't want them stolen from me."

"Yet you turned me away every time I gave you an opportunity to share them with me. You know me well enough to know that I am not a patient man. How long did you think I would wait for you to make a move?"

"_I_ _don__'__t__understand_how your impatience justifies your antics."

"I never said it justified them. And you could have stopped me anytime you wanted," he said. Bringing his hand back up to Severus's chin, he forced the man to look at him. "I, on the other hand, was bound and wandless, incapable of stopping you even if I had wanted to, all because you didn't trust me not to change my mind. Am I wrong?" Severus tried to jerk his chin out of Harry's hand but was unsuccessful. "You asked me in the room to tell you what I wanted. Do you still want to know?"

Severus sighed. "You know I do."

"I want you to trust me." With that statement he lifted the curse he'd laid on Severus and stormed out, tossing Snape's wand over his shoulder as he did so.

Harry's plea for trust resonated in Severus's mind the remainder of the evening and much of the following day. He kept to his rooms, considering how he could prove to Harry that he trusted him. Not, of course, that the brat had given him any reason whatsoever to trust him, but he supposed he hadn't exactly proven himself trustworthy, either.

He arrived at dinner still uncertain about his next move. Harry was in attendance, busy at the task of ignoring Severus. He quickly resolved to get Harry's attention by any means necessary. "_Handlen Heer_," he muttered. He watched as Potter gave an involuntary shudder, but otherwise continued to ignore him.

"_Handlen__Heer_," Severus muttered again. Potter's reaction was the same. "_Handlen __Femora_," he mumbled.

Potter's hands shot down to his lap as he gasped. He quickly covered it up with a manufactured coughing fit. Severus grinned. Apparently Potter enjoyed that little sensation. But how to get him to acknowledge Severus . . .?

It might have been a dirty, dirty move, but it was an irresistible one. "_Toccare__Prostata_." Harry actually jumped a little at the sensation. Harry turned and glared at him.

"This is neither the time nor place, Headmaster."

"I know," Severus whispered. "That's what makes it so much fun."

"I am not in the mood for that sort of fun right now, sir." Harry turned back towards Hermione.

Severus sighed and decided to take a different path. He slipped his hand gently onto Harry's thigh, more to get his attention back than anything. "Look here," he whispered.

Harry turned to look at him. "What do you want, Severus?" He asked wearily.

"I'm sorry for the way I've treated you," Severus said quickly, his volume conversational rather than private. "Getting even isn't nearly as important as getting over oneself and I'm old enough to know better." He began whispering again. "Whatever I've thought you did wrong is forgiven."

Potter put his hand over Severus's. "Now is not the time or the place for _that_either," he said firmly. Severus looked down certain Harry was about to remove his hand. Instead, he squeezed it lightly. "We can discuss this later over a drink, I promise." Harry took his hand off of Severus's.

"Your quarters or mine?" Severus asked eagerly.

Harry grinned. "Wherever you feel more comfortable."

Severus nodded. "My place is nicer."

"I'll see you after my rounds then." He turned back to Hermione. Severus made to remove his hand from Harry's thigh. Harry put his hand back on top of Severus's and placed it firmly on his thigh once more. It was all the Headmaster could do not to smile and ruin his reputation forever.

It was just after eleven when Harry knocked on his door. Severus, more nervous than he felt he should be, let him in and gestured him towards the living room. He took his time to lock up for the night before following. _"I hope I'm not being presumptuous."_ he thought to himself as he walked into the sitting room. Harry was standing in front of the fire. He turned to look at Severus as he entered the room.

Severus stopped short at the look of impassivity Potter wore. They just stared at each other for a few moments before Harry finally broke the silence.

"Come here, Severus." Severus obeyed without any hesitation and went to stand before Harry. "Good. Now give me your wand."

Severus swallowed at that. He knew that it would be the ultimate sign of trust for him to willingly hand over his wand (especially as he'd never done it before); but could he really trust the man in front of him? He searched Harry's face and eyes in vain for any indication of what the young man was feeling, but he had taught him too well, it seemed. For the first time ever Potter had managed to close himself off completely. It was unnerving, to say the least.

Severus looked down at Harry's outstretched hand as he waited for him to comply. He thought back to all Potter had said the night before. He wouldn't wait forever. Severus slowly drew his wand and placed it in Harry's palm. The young man quickly wrapped his fingers around it and pulled his own wand out. He lay them both on the mantle piece before guiding Severus into his favorite chair.

"Unbutton the top of your robes Severus," he said as he walked over to the cabinet and poured two Firewhiskeys. Severus complied even going as far as to push his collar open wide staring at the fire as he did so. He didn't notice Harry's movements until he looked up and found the man standing in front of him. Instead of handing Severus a drink he put them both on the table. Slowly Harry reached out and traced the scars along Severus's neck before moving his hand up to Severus's face and gently kissing him.

Severus was once again stunned by Harry's actions; this was certainly not what he had been expecting. Harry pulled back and looked at him. Severus willed himself to drop his own mask and allowed Harry to see everything. Finally Harry smiled.

"Now. Tell me what you want."

"What I want now or in the long term? Because honestly, when you tell a man to unbutton his robes, the mind is going to pursue that track, " Severus replied.

"I'll settle for what you want right now. Long term we'll work out as we go,"

Severus stood up abruptly hauling Harry to him before kissing him soundly. "I'd much rather show you. You know talking about these things isn't my strong suit."

"I can settle for that for now," Harry replied before pulling Severus to him for another passionate kiss. Severus quickly took control, deepening the kiss and, with a mere wave of his hand, vanished his and Potter's clothing.

"You're going to have to teach me that one, Severus," Harry said breathlessly as Severus began kissing his way down to Harry's neck, biting him none too gently. He smirked as he heard the young man moan.

"Perhaps," he said making his way over to Harry's ear. "If you behave, of course."

"Hm. I haven't ever really behaved. It seems to have paid off for me thus far," Harry replied, smiling. He pulled Severus's mouth back to his own. The kiss broke rather suddenly.

"Thus far being the key phrase, young man. I'm not one to tolerate your nefarious antics," he joked, looking serious as ever.

"All the more reason to misbehave . . .."

Severus chuckled. "Shut up and come to bed," he ordered, grabbing Harry's hand and dragging him into the bedroom. "Bed," he ordered more sternly, annoyed with watching Harry stand there, naked and clueless.

Harry shot to the bed swifter than Severus imagined was possible. Pervertedly, a smile crept over his face. Harry looked up at him expectantly. Severus chuckled darkly as he slowly made his way over to the bed.

"Eager much?"

"You have no idea," Harry said puling him onto the bed as soon as he was in range. Harry pushed him and down and straddled him once more before kissing him again. There was passion there to be sure, but there was something else in it as well, and Severus could only marvel at the sensations he was feeling as Harry slowly kissed, licked, and bit his way down his body. As always, Harry surprised him by skipping over the obvious and instead devoted his talented mouth to every other inch of his body while simultaneously exploring with his hands.

"_He's going to be the death of me,"_ Severus thought idly as Harry made his way back up and finally took his length into his mouth. That was the last coherent thought he had for quite awhile.

Harry smirked as he heard Severus moan in pleasure at his touch and writhe underneath him as sucked the man's cock. This is something he never would have managed on his own, Polyjuice Potion or not, and he'd been wanting to do it for a long time. He stopped only when Severus grabbed him by the hair to guide him back up to his mouth. Harry grinned as he felt himself flipped onto his back.

"I don't want to wait anymore, Harry," Severus whispered in his ear before gently nipping at his lobe.

"No one is stopping you," Harry managed to gasp out as he felt Severus's hand wrap around his erection.

"Tell me what you want Harry," the man drawled as he lazily stroked. Severus sat up placing his hand on Harry's hip maintaining the pace of the exchange. He stroked a little making Harry moan even louder. "Tell me what you want." Harry bit his lower lip as Severus added his mouth, slowly licking him from base to tip. "Tell me..."

"I want you to make love to me Severus." Severus froze for a moment. No one had ever asked that of him before. Love had never before featured in any of his bedroom activities. Harry propped himself up on his elbows and looked at him, though he didn't seem all that distraught at Severus's hesitation. No he just looked up at him with those green eyes, darkened by his lust and looked expectantly at Severus as if waiting for some kind of reply.

Severus licked his lips. "I'm not sure I know how to make love, Harry." He said it simply and openly hoping the young man would understand. He felt Harry's hand close over his, moving it slowly up and down his shaft. Not once did he take his eyes off of Severus.

"You're doing all right so far," he said quickening the pace just a bit. "I trust you, Severus. Whatever you come up with I'm sure will be..." he threw his head back as Severus once more took control.

"You're sure it will be..."

"Quite...satisfactory." The boy was damn near panting now and Severus was barely touching him. Although the urgency was still there, there was a gentleness in the whole exchange that Severus found thrilling. This was nothing like anything else he'd ever experienced. It was turning him on far more than he expected it would.

"I really cannot wait any longer Harry," he ground out, his need overwhelming his desire to draw this out as long as physically possible. He spread Harry's legs wide. As much as Harry was clearly enjoying himself, it did not escape Severus's notice that a look of trepidation passed over his face.

"Harry, have you done this before?"

"Not with a man," he said, looking away, embarrassed.

"_I can't believe I'm his first,"_ he couldn't stop himself from thinking. Severus leaned down and stroked his cheek before forcing Harry to look at him. He kissed him gently. "Are you sure this is what you want?" he asked hoping the answer was yes. He could stop if Harry wanted him to, but he really didn't want to.

"Yes, Severus, I'm sure," he replied before bringing Severus's mouth back to his.

Severus couldn't keep himself from moaning in relief. Slowly, he sat back up. He looked down in wonder at the wanton display Potter made, laying before him, legs spread and fully erect. He smiled. "That's a relief," he replied. Severus slowly slid across the bed and between Harry's legs. As he kissed him, Severus stroked Harry's cock between his fingers and massaged his perineum. One finger a a time, he eased into Harry's asshole. With each new addition came a deeper, more enthusiastic moan.

Severus smiled. "You _are_ ready for this, aren't you?" he asked rhetorically. Harry moaned a response. He kissed Harry again as he slid in the third finger. Harry grabbed the back of Severus's neck firmly.

Severus broke the kiss, took his cock in hand and whispered a lubrication spell. He guided himself just outside of Harry and took a deep breath.

"_Is__this__really__happening_?" he thought.

He thrust into Harry delicately. Harry supplied another moan of approval. "Mm, Severus."

Severus grinned and continued slowly, convinced he'd quickly mastered the art of genuine lovemaking.

He lifted Harry's legs over his shoulders and slipped back inside. Harry jumped as Severus's cock made contact with his prostate. "Mmmm..." He was grinning. "Amazing, Severus."

Severus wrapped his fist around Harry's cock tightly and began to massage. Harry grinned. Severus let his hand slip down over Harry's balls. He took them firmly in hand and pulled and rubbed, pushing them up towards his cock. Severus grabbed both in his hands and kneaded them solidly.

Up, down, clockwise, counterclockwise . . . Severus stroked Harry in every imaginable way as he sped up. "Like that?"

"Yesss," Harry hissed. "God, yes."

Severus smiled. He liked to be thought of as a god, even if he was only calling one to mind. He thrust into Harry faster and harder. "Are you going to come for me?"

"Mmm hmm," Harry moaned, panting. "Yesss."

Again, Severus sped up and tightened his grip on Potter's cock.

Harry came suddenly, covering Severus's hands in sticky mess. He kept pushing into Harry, eager to ensure the first time was more than adequate. What could up the ante? Severus reached up and, staring into Harry's eyes, licked the come off of his hands. Harry moaned again and chuckled exhaustedly.

A few more thrusts and Severus found himself spent. He collapsed onto the bed beside Harry. He felt Harry's hand reaching for him and for a moment was worried that Harry might be a cuddler, but the young man merely took his hand in his own. They lay side by side staring at the ceiling and holding hands for quite awhile before Harry turned his head to look at him.

"That was perfect, Severus. Thank you." Harry leaned over and kissed the tip of his nose. "Now I want you to fuck my brains out. Whenever you're up for it again."

Severus grinned, hungrily. "Few more minutes and no problem."

Epilogue:

Harry grabbed his wand and stormed out of his and Severus's chambers. Severus reached him just as he reached the hall and grabbed his arm.

"Where are you going?" Severus hissed as Harry tried to yank his arm free.

"I'm going out." They stared at each other angrily, neither of them noticing Ginny and Ron making their way down the hall.

"You can't just walk out because we're having a fight."

Itwas their first fight. Harry could hear the underlying fear in Severus's voice. He was scared that even after five months Harry really was leaving him. He stopped trying to get away and turned into Severus's arms.

"I'm not walking out," he said running his hand down the older man's chest before cupping him. "I'm simply taking a walk to calm down. Now. I've grown just as fond of your balls as I'm sure you are and if we keep talking about this right now I'm not sure I'll be able to stop myself from hexing them off."

"Why do I always have to walk in on these conversations?" Ron lamented as they took in the scene in front of them. Harry stepped away from Severus removing his hand as he did so.

"What have you done now?" Ginny asked. She had her hands on her hips and was glaring at Harry. Severus smirked at his diminutive protector.

"I haven't done anything. It's just a fight. Like a 'two people who are used to having their _privacy_," he looked at Severus pointedly, "and have just begun living together' kind of fight."

"Well. I was just stopping by to see if Severus fancied a Chess match, but I can see he's busy. I'll be in my quarters if you're up for it later, sir." Ron turned on his heel and retreated.

"An interesting choice of words," Severus muttered under his breath causing Harry to laugh and Ginny to giggle.

"I'm going to leave you two to do whatever it is you do do when I'm not around," Harry said. "Severus, I love you, but you're pissing me off right now. I'll see you at dinner and we'll talk later." He said squeezing Severus's arm reassuringly. "Ginny, try not to be such a bad influence on him."

Turning to go, Severus caught him by the arm once more and pulled him into an embrace. "I love you too, brat," Severus whispered in his ear before kissing him soundly. He released Harry, now slightly dazed, before gesturing Ginny to precede him into their chambers.

Harry walked out of the castle already feeling better about their fight. They would make it through this, hopefully without anyone being dosed or bound. At least not without consent. He was halfway to Hogsmeade when he ran into a very excited George Weasley walking up the path to the castle.

"Where's Severus?"

"In our rooms plotting with your sister." The look on George's face when he shared that bit of news put him into an even better mood. This man at least seemed to understand why that could be a very bad thing.

"Let's hope they don't get it into their minds to take over the world or something."

"'Chosen One' or not I'm moving to Antarctica if it comes to that," he said half seriously. "Why are you looking for Severus?"

"I'll show you, but only if you promise not to tell him yet. I want to be there when he finds out for the first time."

"Finds out about what?"

George pulled something out of his pocket and handed it to Harry.

"You've got to be kidding me." Harry looked up at George in wonder.

"Nope. That is Severus Snape on a Chocolate Frog card."

"You have to stay for dinner tonight. But first come have a drink with me and help me come up with ideas to counter whatever ideas Ginny and Severus might be cooking up."

"That is an act of futility."

"Yes, but it's entertaining. Let's go." With that Harry grabbed George and apparated them just outside The Hog's Head.

Later that night he discovered exactly how futile his and George's brainstorming had been. He loved every second of it.


End file.
